5 Years and the journey has just begun.

Oct 02, 2011

I have been pretty slack in keeping up my blog, but I have always managed to write a post on my surgiversary each year. This year is quite a milestone. It has been 5 years since I had my surgery, I have had few if any side effects or complications. I am doing quite well, because I picked a highly qualified surgeon and chose a safe place to go. So much has changed even since then in the world of weight loss surgery. It is much more attainable and they know so much more about it now. One thing that has NOT changed is that programs do NOT prepare their patients for all that this journey will require of them. They do not provide them with the MH counseling that they will inevitably need. They do not understand how to help older post ops stay succesful. They also not tell patients that once they have lost their weight during their honeymoon phase the likelihood of regain is hight even if you do all the right things. It is just a part of biology and the working of your new body. It is a shame that these programs are not comprehensive and prepare people for the long run. But then we have to remember that these programs are a business and it is not good business to work with post ops that are further out, they may scare they newbies and they dont generate much income. I am very grateful that there are places like OH for people to come and get the " real story" and that there are support groups and WLS connections to be made that help each person find their way. This is so important to this journey. The friends I have made here on OH in the PA forum have been the second best gift I have been given since i lost the weight.
Where I am at now is a new Chapter. I am in therapy that is very intense and I am learing so much about myself. I am learning that my food issues are an addiction, and that I am struggling with Complex trauma. I have spent most of my life checked out by eating or struggling to stay present. I have had regain because I have returned to my addiction to food to try and deal with the ongoing trauma and its impact on my life and relationships. What I have found is that the surgery was easy, this stuff this work I am doing is translating into the fight of my life. But it is a fight that I am willing to enlist in. I have come too far to stop now. I have had to make some very hard decisions about the people i allow in my life, and each day I struggle to stay optimistic. But I know in the end the work and the pain will be worth it.
Never forget thta you must deal with why you became heavy, sometimes you dont even know why.  But it must happen or there is not true healing. Never give up before your miracle. I wont.

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