nikkemo
The best birthday Gift
Jun 03, 2009
Finally after weeks and weeks of bouncing between 5lbs, it finally happened. I finally hit Onederland. And on my birthday too. I woke up this morning feeling like, ok let's get the corny cubicle decorations and balloons over with. Try to smile at the people who say you look great to your face, but then say I can't believe she had "that surgery" and she cheated(yeah ok, as my pouch decides to play Throw some D's and reject whatever food it doesn't like that day, I took the easy way out). But right now, none of that matters because it's my Birthday, I'm 29 and finally made it to Onederland.
4 comments
6 month check up
May 19, 2009
and it's not good. I'm anemic, my PTH is elevated and Vit D is low. So that means I'm leeching calcium from my bones. Nice. And my vit A is low too. My B12 is too high. That seems to be the only thing I absorb. And I am in a stall. NUT thinks it's because I'm not eating enough, I skip meals and my diet is not up to par. I should be getting about 1200 cal, I'm not. I should be incorporating protein, fruits, veggies and starches in my diet. I don't. And I'm a slow loser. Yeah, but I'm doing good with my B12. I guess that's the cause of my tiredness and general disdain for life right now.
Sad thing is I take my vits daily. I guess I just don't absorb them. So now I'm on super doses of vits. My goal for the next month is to switch up my exercise to break this stall, increase my food calories and eat a more balanced diet. Wow.
If you are reading this and slippin on the vitamins, please correct it now. Apparently it's hard to fix deficiencies especially the vit A one. And since I'm so young(hahaha) I need to correct that calcium things like now or be a hunch back in 40yrs. Oh and if you like your teeth too. Apparently you need calcium to keep your teeth in your mouth. LOL
2 comments
Sad thing is I take my vits daily. I guess I just don't absorb them. So now I'm on super doses of vits. My goal for the next month is to switch up my exercise to break this stall, increase my food calories and eat a more balanced diet. Wow.
If you are reading this and slippin on the vitamins, please correct it now. Apparently it's hard to fix deficiencies especially the vit A one. And since I'm so young(hahaha) I need to correct that calcium things like now or be a hunch back in 40yrs. Oh and if you like your teeth too. Apparently you need calcium to keep your teeth in your mouth. LOL
Life is too short....
May 04, 2009
Last night my little cousin died in a car accident. She was only 23yrs old. 5yrs younger than me. She was so beautiful, smile that could melt the coldest of hearts. Her personality lit up rooms when she walked in. The last time I saw her was last year. She lived 30 minutes from me. Family is the only thing you have when all the chips are down, when the wheels stop spinning, the money runs out and your love packs their bags and moves on from your life. Family is who will always be there, even when you step on their heads to climb your way to the top.
I tend to take things for granted and never realizing the blessing it is to have friends and family in my life. Those who love me despite all my faults, ups and downs, and my constant need to be free of them. I took my friendships for granted, my health for granted and my youth for granted. No day is promised and I'm so grateful for being able to tell my friends and family how much they truly mean to me. If you are reading this, I pray that you do the same. Make amends with those in your life that are on the fritz. Appreciate the blessings no matter how small. Recognise the beauty in yourself because this is the person most likely to be left out.
And if you can please keep me and my family in your prayers.
I love you Meka. I was truly blessed to have you in my life for the last 23 yrs.
3 comments
I tend to take things for granted and never realizing the blessing it is to have friends and family in my life. Those who love me despite all my faults, ups and downs, and my constant need to be free of them. I took my friendships for granted, my health for granted and my youth for granted. No day is promised and I'm so grateful for being able to tell my friends and family how much they truly mean to me. If you are reading this, I pray that you do the same. Make amends with those in your life that are on the fritz. Appreciate the blessings no matter how small. Recognise the beauty in yourself because this is the person most likely to be left out.
And if you can please keep me and my family in your prayers.
I love you Meka. I was truly blessed to have you in my life for the last 23 yrs.
is it just me
Apr 27, 2009
or does everyone else's pouch gets grouchier the further out they get. I'm eating less and less as time goes by. Nothing seems good, everything smells great until it's time for fork to hit mouth. Then, yuck. I wave of disgust and nausea hit me and I end up eating a stick of cheese. Man, if you would have told me a year ago I would be surviving on cheese and beans, I would have laughed at you.
My diet is very much like the beginning: string cheese, refried beans, chili. I choke a couple of bites of chicken and fish down. I had 3 slices of an apple and that mug is still deciding if it wants to go down or come back up. This WLS thing is definitely a roller coaster. Who ever thought the chick who never met a hamburger she didn't like, would be turning down food. SMDH
Could it be, yep it is
Apr 20, 2009
I'm in a 14. I couldn't believe it. I had to try on several things that was a 14 too, you know, just to be sure. Damn it feels good. Last time I was in this size was 2001, eight whole years ago. I felt so good I was almost tempted to get on the scale. Notice I said almost. That daggone scale will be the death of me.
2 comments
Next stop Dumpsville, population me
Apr 11, 2009
I love cereal. Before surgery on a lazy Saturday morning and afternoon, cereal was my go to food of choice. It was so convient and easy and most of all, easy and convient. Now Cinnamin Toast Crunch was my absolute favorite followed by Coco Puffs when I was craving Chocolate.
Well today from my Tylenol Sinus induced haze I think what should I eat. Protein requirement have been met and I really don't feel like eating anyway. I want Chocolate. So I procede to fix me a nice 3/4c serving of Coco Pebbles. First spoonful was heaven and I could eat it all while laying on the couch. Beautiful. I finished my pebbles and put my bowl in the dishwasher. Then my pouch makes a noise that's not that familar. Thinking nothing of it, I continue watching my Deuce Bigalow-Male Gigaloo. Next thing you know I'm balled up on the floor praying for death and the dry heaving to stop. I call my mom because obviously something has to be wrong with me, must require her to make the hour and half drive to my house. She laughs and says that's just a dumping. Oh no, it can't be. I don't dump. She laughs again. What did you eat. Coca pebbles with only 11g of sugar. I've had more than that in 1/2c of juice.
So I follow mom's order of lay down and let it pass. Somewhere between the last prayer and that call, 2 hrs passed and I woke up feeling normal again.
Coco Pebbbles are the devil and must be destroyed. My pouch has yet again kicked my ass in a fight I didn't even know I had entered. As I sit here and wonder what I did to my pouch to deserve such a violent treason-like mutiny, I can't help but laugh. Had I simply ate a boiled egg and cheese stick, all that could have been avoided.
So now I say goodbye old friend, my chocolatey companion. While I enjoyed you all 27yrs of my life, today we part ways. My pouch hates you and like the tyrant ruler she is, I must obey or feel her wraith.
Sings Boys to Men End of the Road as I toss out the box of Coco Pebbles.
6 comments
Well today from my Tylenol Sinus induced haze I think what should I eat. Protein requirement have been met and I really don't feel like eating anyway. I want Chocolate. So I procede to fix me a nice 3/4c serving of Coco Pebbles. First spoonful was heaven and I could eat it all while laying on the couch. Beautiful. I finished my pebbles and put my bowl in the dishwasher. Then my pouch makes a noise that's not that familar. Thinking nothing of it, I continue watching my Deuce Bigalow-Male Gigaloo. Next thing you know I'm balled up on the floor praying for death and the dry heaving to stop. I call my mom because obviously something has to be wrong with me, must require her to make the hour and half drive to my house. She laughs and says that's just a dumping. Oh no, it can't be. I don't dump. She laughs again. What did you eat. Coca pebbles with only 11g of sugar. I've had more than that in 1/2c of juice.
So I follow mom's order of lay down and let it pass. Somewhere between the last prayer and that call, 2 hrs passed and I woke up feeling normal again.
Coco Pebbbles are the devil and must be destroyed. My pouch has yet again kicked my ass in a fight I didn't even know I had entered. As I sit here and wonder what I did to my pouch to deserve such a violent treason-like mutiny, I can't help but laugh. Had I simply ate a boiled egg and cheese stick, all that could have been avoided.
So now I say goodbye old friend, my chocolatey companion. While I enjoyed you all 27yrs of my life, today we part ways. My pouch hates you and like the tyrant ruler she is, I must obey or feel her wraith.
Sings Boys to Men End of the Road as I toss out the box of Coco Pebbles.
So the whispering starts
Mar 26, 2009
At work that is. Now I am all for being open and honest about my choice to have surgery and what not. But must every freakin time I come in the breakroom to get either coffee or water, I have to answer the question of how'd you do it. My answer is not going to change. If you see me outside walking my ass off, drinking water like it's free shots of Henny at the club, then put two and two together. If you choose to remain the weight you are, then just say looking good and keep it moving. But why hate because I am no longer at the vending machine buying up all the peanut M&M's and a coke. And me and ole girl was cool. Now she rolling her eyes at me and whispering behind my back.
I don't know why it is bothering me so much, but it is. I love talking to other big girls about surgery options. I feel like I am paying it forward. A coworker put me up on game back in 2005. I thank God for her everyday since because she is the real reason I gave it a real thought. I feel like I tried to lead the horse to water and she is refusing to drink. I'm ready to shoot the damn horse.
But on a much brighter note:
It's strawberry season and the patch by my job is in full bloom. I love fresh strawberries and I get to have chocolate strawberry protein smoothies and strawberries and ff cool whip for dessert. I love the springtime.
8 comments
I don't know why it is bothering me so much, but it is. I love talking to other big girls about surgery options. I feel like I am paying it forward. A coworker put me up on game back in 2005. I thank God for her everyday since because she is the real reason I gave it a real thought. I feel like I tried to lead the horse to water and she is refusing to drink. I'm ready to shoot the damn horse.
But on a much brighter note:
It's strawberry season and the patch by my job is in full bloom. I love fresh strawberries and I get to have chocolate strawberry protein smoothies and strawberries and ff cool whip for dessert. I love the springtime.
3 months out
Mar 11, 2009
and I am down 43 lbs since surgery and 59 total from the highest. I'm 2 lbs away from being half way to goal. I am kind of excited but still in disbelief.
One of my wishes for this surgery was to be pain free. i can happily report that i have been pain free with exercising for about a month. Now all pain comes from 4" heels but thats a whole nother issue and a problem I will gladly accept in exchange for becoming healthy and trying to be cute at work.
I never in my wildest dreams imagine these changes happening as fast as they have. Its like I have been reborn and am just now starting to live life again. Its very fun and I sure have missed a lot by sitting in front of the fridge and laying on the couch. I didn't realize how miserable I was. I guess its like Mater said(Cars)" You don't have to know where your going, just have to know where you been".
2 comments
One of my wishes for this surgery was to be pain free. i can happily report that i have been pain free with exercising for about a month. Now all pain comes from 4" heels but thats a whole nother issue and a problem I will gladly accept in exchange for becoming healthy and trying to be cute at work.
I never in my wildest dreams imagine these changes happening as fast as they have. Its like I have been reborn and am just now starting to live life again. Its very fun and I sure have missed a lot by sitting in front of the fridge and laying on the couch. I didn't realize how miserable I was. I guess its like Mater said(Cars)" You don't have to know where your going, just have to know where you been".
Migraine ramblings and protein rants @ 9wks
Feb 22, 2009
Sometimes I feel like I am the only one who gets sick of eating protein. Today was one of those days for me. I just didn't feel like eating. A migraine is kicking my butt and I'm so over it. I mist have dragged my butt out of bed at least 3 times to see what looked good. Nothing looked good. Now pre WLS, my migraine buster was 32oz Coke, Maxalt, Naproxen, and a Snickers. That combo right there would have me feeling better in 2 days. Now I have eliminated all but the Maxalt. And this is the first time in almost a year that I could not break a migraine. Needless to say, I have not met my protein goals for the day and am ready to remove my own brain with tweezers.
Sometimes, I feel like I am the only one in the struggle. Like I am the only one who struggles to make better food choices and to keep protein first. And sometimes I would like to make a post about it. But then there are the holier than thou self professed WLS gurus who are just waiting to rip a newbie like me a new one for being honest. But such is life. I know there are good days and bad days. Today is just one of my bad days(ok, weekends because lets face it, yesterday wasn't so good for me either). Thank god tomorrow starts a new day and I can start over.
On a way more positive note:
I tried on my new favorite Old navy jeans. They are getting big. Thats so crazy. 2 weeks ago I had to hold my breath to zip them and now they are loose. Its little incentives like this that keep me going. I swear I think I'm the worst WLS patient in the world and my body is showing me that, nope you not that far off track. Its hard not comparing yourself to others, especially when you see people who have lost XXX amount of pounds in XXX amount of days, and you are not doing the same. But then I look in the mirror and see a real change. I didn't see it before but I see it now.
My goal for the next 3 weeks is to maintain my protein goal of at least 70g and 8 cups of water each day. I know that seems low but for me, thats good. Also I need to remember that second dose of calcium.
My new favorite protein shakes: Nectar roadside Lemonade and Crystal Sky. Its a great change from my chocolate shakes and I can mix it with Crystal light and Hawaiian Punch.
5 comments
Sometimes, I feel like I am the only one in the struggle. Like I am the only one who struggles to make better food choices and to keep protein first. And sometimes I would like to make a post about it. But then there are the holier than thou self professed WLS gurus who are just waiting to rip a newbie like me a new one for being honest. But such is life. I know there are good days and bad days. Today is just one of my bad days(ok, weekends because lets face it, yesterday wasn't so good for me either). Thank god tomorrow starts a new day and I can start over.
On a way more positive note:
I tried on my new favorite Old navy jeans. They are getting big. Thats so crazy. 2 weeks ago I had to hold my breath to zip them and now they are loose. Its little incentives like this that keep me going. I swear I think I'm the worst WLS patient in the world and my body is showing me that, nope you not that far off track. Its hard not comparing yourself to others, especially when you see people who have lost XXX amount of pounds in XXX amount of days, and you are not doing the same. But then I look in the mirror and see a real change. I didn't see it before but I see it now.
My goal for the next 3 weeks is to maintain my protein goal of at least 70g and 8 cups of water each day. I know that seems low but for me, thats good. Also I need to remember that second dose of calcium.
My new favorite protein shakes: Nectar roadside Lemonade and Crystal Sky. Its a great change from my chocolate shakes and I can mix it with Crystal light and Hawaiian Punch.
To my surprise
Feb 12, 2009
the scale said 218....
I could not believe it, so I weighed again and it still said 218. OMG. I saw the dr and he was so excited for me. I love Dr. Zane. He is such an amazing man, really funny and caring. I know everyone says this about their surgeon but its so true. He cleared me for all food. I asked him was that including things like cucumber( I am craving cucumbers with chili &lime). He said yep. Just small portions and remember to chew slowly and small bites.
I am just so excited. I don't see him for another 3 months. My Valentines weekend has started off right. He asked me when was the last time I was under 200. I had to think about it. The last time I saw under 200 was in 2002, I was working for animal control, walking like 5 hrs a day and I lost from 200 to 170. I thought I looked really good. Probably too good because that was the year I got pregnant with my son. I was 170 for all of 3 months then I blew up again. I delivered at 216. Before that, the last time I was under 200 was when I graduated from high school in 1998. I was 178. I will never forget those numbers because I couldn't believe it. Then the summer before college I blew up to 200. Its been over a decade that I seen under 170.
Now I can't believe that I am 19lbs from wonderland. I'm trying to think of a goal weight. I orginally thought 140 but now more realistically I'm thinking 150. Anything after that will be icing on the cake.
0 comments
I could not believe it, so I weighed again and it still said 218. OMG. I saw the dr and he was so excited for me. I love Dr. Zane. He is such an amazing man, really funny and caring. I know everyone says this about their surgeon but its so true. He cleared me for all food. I asked him was that including things like cucumber( I am craving cucumbers with chili &lime). He said yep. Just small portions and remember to chew slowly and small bites.
I am just so excited. I don't see him for another 3 months. My Valentines weekend has started off right. He asked me when was the last time I was under 200. I had to think about it. The last time I saw under 200 was in 2002, I was working for animal control, walking like 5 hrs a day and I lost from 200 to 170. I thought I looked really good. Probably too good because that was the year I got pregnant with my son. I was 170 for all of 3 months then I blew up again. I delivered at 216. Before that, the last time I was under 200 was when I graduated from high school in 1998. I was 178. I will never forget those numbers because I couldn't believe it. Then the summer before college I blew up to 200. Its been over a decade that I seen under 170.
Now I can't believe that I am 19lbs from wonderland. I'm trying to think of a goal weight. I orginally thought 140 but now more realistically I'm thinking 150. Anything after that will be icing on the cake.
About Me
Orange, CA
Location
36.7
BMI
Surgery
12/16/2008
Surgery Date
Apr 30, 2007
Member Since
