nyg_girl80
I was trying to think how I would tell my story since I am sure all our stories are probably very similar , so I decided to tell you
all a little about myself, My name is Pamela ( you can call me Pam ) I am 34 yrs old I have been married for 6yrs but together for over 10, we have a son ( my husband's step son) who will be 15 in July , our daughter who will be 10 in July ( yes October very popular month 
...LOL I am 5' 7" and currently weigh 337 and I did once have a goal of 150 ( my weight before I had my son was 140 but that was a LONG TIME AGO) but now I would just like to fit into this beautiful sun dress I bought long time ago to inspire me and
as you can see it didn't happen...I can say that now with sarcasm but before no way.
I gained this weight with my first pregnancy and by the time he was 4 I had almost lost it all then got pregnant with my daughter and
well it all came back with a vengeance, I tried many, many , many diets from WW to Dr.Phil and I will admit I did loose over 150 with the Michael Thurmond diet but also my hair so I stopped and in about 2yrs it too came back with more than left, I do suffer from low
self esteem and even though my husband loves me for who I am and is supportive of me I still feel guilty .
I will admit I have never had an embarrassing fat moment in public that is but when I go out I feel like people are starring at me
and I worry how this will affect my children, see my mother was over weight when I was a kid and I remember kids making fun of her and how this made me feel I dont want that for my kids especially my daughter, and to make sure they dont have a weight issue I have been watching allot of what they eat and making sure they stay active.
I am also a BIG ( no pun ) NEW YORK GIANTS fan ( for those who dont follow its a NFL football team) I even got a tattoo with there logo ( my first tat ever ) and actually looking forward to many more, LOL
I also collect polar bears or anything with a polar bear on them ( I have about 400 items)....basicaly my room is NYG and polar bears something else my hubby is ok with...
I guess what it comes down to is I am so DAM tired of being this way , shopping in the plus size I want to shop in a fancy store no more wal-mart and I want to buy a Victoria Bra but I am also afraid , terrified is more like it of loosing my hair if I have any weight loss surgery its the only part of my body I like ( besides my feet 
) I wish there was a magic pill to help me and people like me but like someone once said I didnt get over weight over night and wont loose it that way either.
I have so many other goals like playing with my kids, fitting in the seats at the movies and Giants stadium , not crying when I look in the mirror, wearing a bathing suit in public and being able to see my feet standing straight up without having to bend over...
