i am so aggrivated. frustrasted!!!!!!!

Apr 29, 2009

I just realized that I am almost 18 months post op. Okay I have 3 months to go but I am screwing up! In the last 2 months I have been eatting candy, potato chips, and french fries...plus drinking soda.
Its stress eatting just like in the past! Since I was diagnosed with having breast cancer and my niece being here, and not being able to work ..... I picked up one candy bar and there I went.
I am so tired of being here alone....fighting cancer by myself dealing with having another surgery and wondering how am I going to pay my bills is just making my head hurt. My niece left Monday to go back home...she said her reason for going home was she missed her Dad and friends. I believe her but now I am back to being here alone and that lonliness is tearing me apart. Scott doesnt know how bad I really am I wont tell him when we talk I make sure I am always cheerful....How do I tell him that I feel awful and that all I want to do is sleep?
I am thankfully working two days a week. But when I am finished I am wore out. Then I am out looking for other work.
So that causes me to stress out, cause I have to explain to prospective employers that I have to have Wednesday's off and then there is that look...
and I know I did nt get the job.
Last year I had to move to a cheaper apartment and I hate it here! I am looking for an aprtment to move to that is in a better area and will not be more than what I am paying. Only problem with that is the lease...I want to be able to leave when I am released from my doc so what to do.....
more stress
And I miss talking to Shirl...
yeppers the upbat girl is on a downer

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About Me
Wheatland, OK
Location
33.1
BMI
RNY
Surgery
11/05/2007
Surgery Date
Jun 05, 2007
Member Since

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