I'm a Scrooge

Dec 07, 2009

I used to LOVE Christmas. I always kind of hated NYE, I hate the pressure people put on the holiday, and I hate the crowds and clubs and obnoxious people. And my birthday is on New Year's Day, so that part always made it even worse. But Christmas, I really loved going all out. Buying the best present I could, decorations, music, parties, I loved it all. This year though, I feel like there's nothing to celebrate. I'm having a really rough time loving my job, my student loans are going into repayment, I live with my parents, dare I go on? I feel very guilty for being sad too, because I know I'm lucky to have supportive parents and friends, and I'm lucky to have a job and an education. Many, many people in America and throughout the world don't have that.

I just don't feel like there is anything to celebrate this year.

Am I thankful? Yes.

Am I joyful? No.

I'm too stressed to enjoy the little things right now. I'm stressed at work, I'm stressed with school (I now won't finish my master's till July, rather than May), I'm worried that I haven't lost enough weight on my diet, I'm worried about the economy and whether I'll be able to pay my student loans back, I'm just stressed about everything.

1 Comment