5 Months Post-Op

Aug 15, 2010

I am now 5 months after surgery and the honeymoon is over. I've lost 8 lbs this month, my weight is 185 lbs. I've lost another 4 inches overall. I feel like I'm hungry now...sometimes...am I? Is it just head hunger? Is it all my bad habits coming back? I feel good, but I'm mentally going crazy. I can definitely eat more now and I think it's scary me. It's also tempting me to try things...bad things...(ok here we go). I've try pizza, chips, candies, Ice cream, cookies, popcorn, fried chicken...can you think of anything else??? I'm so disappointed in myself and I feel like I've failed myself and everyone around me... The thing is I try these things and I don't really want it, I feel like I couldn't have it for so long that I have to have it, or at least try. I don't eat much of it. I don't really have the dumping either. I did feel a little lethargic and nauseous after a couple of things, I could definitely tell that it was too much sugar or fat...So it was definitely a learning experience for me. I got on the right track again. Not cause I was feeling nasty when I was eating these things. I COULD NOT waste this amazing opportunity I was given. I could not throw away this tool I was given. I have to learn, learn, learn...how to use it, how to live a healthy life and learn how to believe in myself, I have to believe that I can do this, that I CAN change. It's not about what you cannot do, it's all about what you CAN do!

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