QuinTesSenTialLyME

What would you do in pursuit of your goals?

Mar 02, 2010

 

With Lent starting yesterday, I began the process of thinking about what I am willing to do without for the next 46 days. I was thinking about what foods I could give up, and what treats I could do without and brainstorming with a co-worker when she said something interesting "shouldn't you give up something that would really kill you to have to do without?" Somehow that comment got me thinking about what I have sacrificed (or given up) because of my weight over the years and what I have recently been willing to do to reach my weightless goals.
 

It could be said, for years, I have set aside my personal life goals because I had little self confidence (or assurance rather) that someone else could find me attractive. Let's tell a story to explain. I have always had this idea that I was going to get married and have kids in my late twenties. I had the notion that I would meet someone special around 25 and get married by like 28 and have kids soon after. I had always seen myself as being a young fun mom. Through the years I had come to realize that I used by weight as a shield against rejection. I came to believe that no one would want to date me because I was fat, and I just settled on that notion sometime in college. Along with those thoughts came the revamping of my plans for family and a meaningful relationship. I began to wonder whether or not it was something that I would ever have and I began to except the possibility of not achieving that major personal goal. I let go of a dream because I was not willing to put myself out there and I was not willing to put myself out there because of my physical appearance.
 

Since I started this weightless journey, I have defiantly regained the notion of having a family someday and defiantly began to embracing my new found confidence. I am much more comfortable in my own skin and a willing to do almost anything to reach my weightless goals. In pursuit of my goals I have taken up running. I run over 20 miles a week and I actually enjoy it (when I am done). Exercise is a daily part of my life now. I can no longer spend an evening watching television, I have to do something! I have adopted a healthier diet. With my tool (surgery) I am able to control my portions, but I have to continue to make good food choices everyday. I drink my 8 glasses of water (plus some) even though I am in the bathroom 20 times a day. I am running a ½ marathon in May. I will reach my goal weight by July! I go out and have fun and I am willing to try new things every day. I am lucky in that I did not have to sacrifice much in the pursuit of my goals, I just had to change my mindset and embrace the changes that came my way. As for the relationship, it is still a work in progress, but I am a firm believer in the notion that you have to love yourself before you can love someone else. (BTW I LOVE ME!)
 

To bring this all back around, for lent I am going to give up using my credit cards and go back to paying for everything in cash. It has nothing to do with losing weight, but weightless is my focus 24/7. Every choice I make in pursuit of my goal can be considered a sacrifice and I want to make them beyond the 46 days of lent.
 

So my fellow readers….what are your willing to sacrifice (or not) in pursuit of your goals?

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Update on Life

Jan 20, 2010

So I have been really neglecting this blog. I have a valid reason; I have stepped from behind my words and in front of a camera. I have been doing Video blogs since the beginning of December (http://www.youtube.com/elf134). Being accountable to viewers really has inspired me to continue to succeed. I feel like I would be letting a whole bunch of people down if I don’t do well. Anyway, a life update. I have reached my half way mark. I have lost a total of 45.5 lbs since May 12th. I reach 50% (44) gone at week 36. I have 44 lbs to go before I reach my personal goal of 138 lbs. For New Years I made a few resolutions. They are as follows: ·         Complete my ½ marathon training ·         Run a ½ marathon ·         Run 3 5Ks ·         Run 3 10Ks ·         Complete a sprint Triathlon ·         Go to Bikram Yoga once a week ·         Eat healthfully 90% of the time ·         Log my meals everyday ·         Go white water rafting ·         Go abroad ·         In general travel more ·         Make more meaningful connections ·         Have someone to ring in the New Years with! They are lofty goals but highly attainable. I am running my first 5K of the year on Valentine’s Day, and my ½ marathon on May 9th. My goal is to get to my surgeon’s goal by my surgiversary, which is 150 lbs. In the past, I have not lost more than 4 lbs a month, but this month I got a body bug and changed up my diet and I have lost a total of 7lbs so far and it is not even the end of the month yet. I stepped on the scale this morning and it read 178.5. I will not count it, since my official weigh-ins are on Tuesdays, but wow! I am excited. I have come to some interesting realizations over the last month. Never will I ever eat only 800 calories a day. I want to eat a balanced, healthy diet that I can maintain for the rest of my life. I like to exercise and I love to run. It is crazy, but at the same time running helps me drop the weight. I wear a size 12 now. It is funny I wore a size 12 when I was 150-165. I am at 180.5 wearing a size 12 so who knows how small I will become. I brought my very first bikini for the summertime yesterday. It is a scary thing, but something that I have always wanted to do. I have a confidence now I never had before and it is a great thing.
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6 Month Update

Nov 19, 2009

I have been at a plateau for a while. It seems like i have been gaining and losing the same 2 lbs for the last 2 months. I got a fill on Sept. 29th of 1 cc, ans since then I have lost 3.5 lbs, which i lost as of Tuesday. So here it the dirty, I have been really against tracking my food the last two months. I felt like i was getting obsessive about it so took a break and focused on my running. So I ran the 5k in September and ran 2 more times and stopped for two weeks. Then I started training for a half marathon, and stopped tracking my food, and stopped losing. After much gripping and complaining to my friends and family and saying that I will not do I hate it, it is horrible, I bitched one more day and started tracking The second week on November. Oh my goodness, i was eating a lot of slider/sweets and the calories add up like crazy. i thought because i was having protein shakes every day, and eating yogurt in the morning I was doing well. Not the case. I had a really eye opening look at the crap i was choosing to eat and decided to cut it out all together. I have recommitted myself to tracking and clean eating. Incorporating fresh fruits and veggies has been a new and daily challenge. Do to the amount I work out, I am on a 1200 calorie diet. it is not too much food and I am eating the right things again. The scale moved for the first time in 3 weeks. i am in the 180s, 188.5 to be exact. It is great that I can finally find the correlation between eating right, tracking and exercise. I think I am finally putting it all together.

So I have not gotten up the nerve to try LA boxing yet. I am going to take a trial week a Bikram yoga. In all this I have continued to lose inches. I have lost a total of 30 inches since surgery and can fit a size 12 pants. Crazy! Running is awesome, but i need to mix it up a bit and have been going back and forth between getting a trainer, yoga, or kickboxing. I think boxing will do awesome things for me, but I need to really see if i want to commit the money to that. Yoga is to reshape my body. My frame is muscular, so I want to try and achieve a leaner look with yoga.

I think I cannot really complain because last year at this time I was think about having surgery, in two week, it will be the anniversary of my consultation, where i took the steps to be more healthier. Today i can say I am ten times more healthier than i was at this time last year
. This is my measure of success.

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5 Month Post-op Update

Oct 12, 2009

So as of Sunday I was down to 192. Last month My Doc had me go get a upper GI to make sure everything was as it was supposed to be. i am fine. He game me a fill of 1 cc about a week ago, and boy do I feel the difference. After a hellish weekend, I am committed to no more soda ever. I drank some of Friday at lunch and had that uncomfortable feeling all weekend, it was just air, but it sucked. I also, need to work on the eating slowly thing and to stop snacking when I am bored. I snacked like crazy on Sunday. Anyway, the problem that i am currently having is that I cannot get all my calories in even with the snacking. Prior to this fill I was at 1200 calories a day, now i am barely hitting 800 and at that low I do not lose. I work out at least 3 times a week or more and not getting enough calories really slows down the weight loss. It is really weird I think. My next milestone is to hit 50% lost which is about 13 lbs away (179). I am reassessing my goal weight. It is at 138 right now but to be a healthy BMI for my height and have a cushion I am shooting for 134. I cannot ever remember being below 145 ever. I do not know if it is realistic as I do have a larger frame, broad shoulders and basic muscular structure. Who knows! Anyway that is it on the weight loss front.

On the personal, I am trying the whole on line dating thing. It is so-so. Not impressed but not disappointed either. I totally have pictures up of me 20 lbs heavier, as i would want somebody to except me as I was and get the added bonus of the the hotness I am becoming. HEHE. We shall see. i will keep you posted. All in all it is slow and steady weight loss. Now if only i can fugue out how to stop myself form buying so many new clothes!
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THE 5K

Sep 25, 2009

So the entire week before my 5K I was sick. It was so bad I was really thinking of not doing it, but On Saturday I woke up and walked to the Race Site. Let just say it was an experience. My friend could not run it with me, so I was there all by myself (in retrospect it was a good thing). I registered asked a bunch of first timer questions and walked over to the start line. Let me tell you once that whistle blew and we were off, it was great. All the people who were trying to place ran right on by then the people who were there to get through it started. I tried to keep pace with a couple of groups, it took me a while to find a group that was going at my pace, and once I found them the race was on. I was running, running, running (they had people stationed to point us in the proper directions) then It happened. I got the the half way mark, grabbed my cup of water and continued on. Not 3 minutes later I had to walk. It was such a mental thing because i was not tired, but I just stopped going. I walked 30 seconds then started up again. Next obstacle was the hills, (which i did not train for), so again I was power walking up the hills. So we get up on top of this one hill and you can see the office buildings in the distance, and that really helped me to power through the last quarter mile. I ran ac cross the finish line with a time of 36.06 which is approximately an 11.30 minute mile. I trained for a 10 minute mile so I will take 11.30 if I have too. At any rate, it was fun and addicting, and inspiring all in one. Training motivated me to work out, 9i got in at least 3 workouts a week) and it was just a great time.

So here is my dilemma. Now that I do not have a goal that I am working towards, I have completely stopped running. I know I want to train for a 10K in May, so I am all about continuing, but I don't have to start yet. Hmmmmmm....what to do in the meantime?

BTW- Surgery Update: Since I was sick< i lost like 10 LBS since the last time I saw my doctor, now he doesn't want to give me a fill. He is all about the numbers. If even the realize band website says that my weight loss has plateaued and I need a fill, shouldn't that be a sign! Urgh!
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sO i AM GoING tO PoST foF MoNth 3 (late) mOntH 4 (early)

Sep 03, 2009

So i have been delinquent in my posting. I am a month behind and that is because i got promoted at work and can no longer write my blog post during the work day.  Sadness!. Quick update. last month I lost like 3 lbs, and wanted a little tweak in my band. Instead of a tweak i had to get blood work and go to the hospital for an upper GI to make sure my band hadn't slipped or eroded. It is fine. Since my last appointment I have been really considering what I have been eating and I think that it is more than a cup at a time, but to be honest i stopped tracking as rigorously as i was. I noticed the week i stopped tracking i lost weight. Coincidence? Maybe, but in my head it correlates. At any rate i reached onderland last week (199.5) and although the scale is sucktastic, i am in a size 14 clothing and completed the C25K program with no trouble. My speed as increased greatly at soccer and I run for fun now. BTW the treadmill is not so fun anymore, so i am trying to switch to outdoors. And I AM RUNNING MY FIRST 5K NEXT WEEKEND (which happens to be on the 12th my official 4 month day).

I feel better about myself image, but still have a lot to work on. The goal for this month is fruits and veggies and iron tablets oh my! My nutritionist has commented on my unique ability to stay within my calorie range while eating cookies and chips. I have such a sweets addiction I am coming to realize and I am trying to work on it. For some reason my day is not complete without a desert....although i did not have one today. Can i get a WHAT WHAT! I notice if I eat right i do not feel like i have to work out but if i have sweets or chips or something i will make myself go tot he gym (mind you I go to the gym/work out at least 5 days a week). Anyway, what started out as a I will post soon got changed into my update. Oh well. off to bed.

XOXO - Elizabeth

Weight as of 4 months is 194.5 LBS! Yippeee!
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2 Months Out and Not sure How I am doing

Jul 16, 2009

Since it is 2 months (4 days ago) I thought I would write about my progress so far. Overall I think I am doing well. I was hoping to lose more by now and I am not impressed with my results since my first fill but overall I am doing well. Since last time I wrote I had a bachelorette party and a wedding, each weekend I did not worry about counting calories, but eat consciously. I notice a lot of people on the broads seem to be resistant to recording/logging food. I do this religiously everyday on the realize band website. It keeps me honest and it forces me to read labels. I record every good food I eat and every not so good food I eat. I have found that allowing myself a treat once in awhile makes the process easier, but I have also come to realize that if I allow myself just one day the next day I am craving sweets again. I actually went through my apartment and got rid of any foods that I consider trigger foods. It has been much better going. Since my fill on the 22nd of 5cc I have lost 1.5 lbs. It is so frustrating not to see the scale moving more rapidly, but the last time this happened the third week I lost 5 lbs. Lets keep our fingers crossed to see what happens on the 21st when I go to the Dr. for a check-up. Let me tell you it took some convincing to get them to give me a fill. But they did so the work was worth it. I can still eat anything that I want; I have no problems with food at all. To me that is not the greatest thing, but I would hate to be throwing up and such. I also try to eat as normal as possible. Since progressing to solid foods in week 4 my nutritionist upped my calories to 1200 for two reasons, First I was getting hungry between meals and second because I wasn’t losing weight when I was only eating 800 calories a day. With my age and activity level I think it is for the best. You can tell that this is true because the week after my first fill I could only get in 800 calories and I was working out and still did not lose one lbs. On another note, people at work are noticing that I am losing weight, but I am not saying that I had surgery. No reason in particular, but to me until I get restriction, this is all me working out and eating right. Speaking of working out, I started the couch to 5k program as soon as I got the okay to run from my Dr. at 4 weeks. I am actually on week 5 and am doing pretty good I think. It gets easier as I go along. Also, I play soccer once a week and today added a weightlifting video to my routine. I was thinking about getting Tracey Anderson Mat Workout DVD. It looks good and I much prefer long and lean to bulky, which I tend to do. Basically I have been working out at least 4 times a week. I am so not one of those people that can work out for 2 hrs a day. I do not have the time nor the inclination to do it.
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1st Fill

Jun 24, 2009

I had my first fill and I have 5CC in my 10CC realize band. Can I get a Hell Yeah! I am super excited because i thought that they would only give me .5cc and was really worried. But they didn't and i am feeling great. i have some restriction, I am on liquids so who can tell, but it is awesome. Key is I am not hungry every second. BTW I so lost 5.5 lbs last week. Crazy crazy crazy. working out is paying off. Yeah. i heart my band.
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Thoughts

Jun 11, 2009

So I was at a support group meeting yesterday and had a aha moment. I weigh the least out of anyone who has gotten banded in the support group, so while the girls are pulling awesome numbers (43 lbs in 2 months) i have lost about 24 lbs, 12 per-op and 12 post op. Anyway the thing that i realized was i am such a numbers person. I know my clothes are fitting better, i am following the rules, and exercising and my clothes fit better, but still I want the number to translate on the scale! This is something I am going to have to work. I am really good and only weight myself once a week,, but darn it the number needs to freakin move faster than 0 - 0.5 lbs a week. Whatever though, i need to not be such a numbers girl and just do what i am doing. as long as I follow the rules i should be fine.

On another note i started couch to 5K last week and it is great. I am going to totally disregard common sense and do it two days in a row. i have to go out of town and it was too late on last night. Excuses excuses, i just need to get to the gym!
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I'm Banded---Yippee

May 13, 2009

I was banded yesterday morning. I went in at 6:00 AM and was home by 1:45 PM. I am doing fine, everything just seems to be moving along great. I am doing everything my Dr. orders, as usual having trouble getting in all my protein. I have has 1/2 cup of yogurt and 1 oz of sager free pudding. I am on full Liquids and I am so not feeling hungry. It is crazy...I am not hungry for the first time ever. I only have a little uncomfortableness. I am not in Pain which is awesome. I have not taken any pain meds and am doing great. I feel like i have done 100 crunched, which i have never done in my life, but otherwise all is good. Anyway, i am banded and on cloud nine!
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About Me
Arlington, VA
Location
30.8
BMI
Surgery
05/12/2009
Surgery Date
Mar 17, 2009
Member Since

Friends 42

Latest Blog 13

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