Rosansamuel
Ok, so this is my story so far. I am 23 years old, almost 24 in February,I am 5'5'', and i weigh in at around 315 lbs.. I stopped checking after i saw that number, so lets just say.. 315..anyway.. i have been overweight all my life.. and to my surprise, it wasnt ever a health issue for me. It was a social issue, for sure.. no invites to the cool parties, no boyfreinds till i got to college (my 1st kiss was actually in college also.) The funny thing is, no one ever made fun of me. I wasnt invited to parties by the cool kids, but I had other ideas in mind, and i focused on school and getting into college. By the time i left high school i weighed about 260. all my freinds would say, you arent fat, you are just a big girl.So i came to terms with being the fat, funny girl, that everyone likes having around to entertain them. Problem is, this got old, real quick. I started dieting for the first time in college, and dropped about 15 or 20 lbs.. the boys noticed.. but i lost freinds because they didnt like that i had stepped out of my role. I mean, how dare i expect to be competing with them for the men?? *sarcastic undertone* Well i was enjoying the attention, but i was still about 240 lbs. I would occasionally go to the doctor, for unrelated issues not having to do with weight.. But i always cringed when i stepped on the scale, thinking, "here comes the, 'you gotta lose weight' lecture." It never came. Doctors didnt say a word. They would take my blood pressure, i thought, "for sure i will get a lecture about this." That lecture never came either. It was as if, there was a big fat elephant in the middle of the room (literally..lol.), and NO one was talking about it! So i became indifferent to my size.. I was having fun, had freinds, had men interested in dating me.. i was in college.. i even made the volleyball team.! yay! but all the while.. my weight was creeping up.. my menstrual cycle vanished.. and my clothes were all too small for me.. I eventually had to drop out of school due to financial aid reasons, and once i was home, and not walking 1 mile to class back and forth.. the lbs kept piling on. By this point, i am at about 265 or 270.. I met my boyfreind Javaughn, who i am still with (our 3 year anniversary was Dec 19th ) and i got BIGGER. everyone said, its fine, its "happy weight". just means you are happy and comfortable.. yeah right! lol. Well, fast forward through all the eating out and not exercising, and here i am.. 315 LBS!!! I STILL havent gotten any lectures from doctors at all, but i am started to feel the effects of having an extra 180 LBS on my 5'5'' frame. i am constantly out of breath, my arms and legs fall asleep all the time, and even cause me to keep waking up in the middle of the night to adjust myself.. i have heart burn, STILL no period (and at my age, kids are right around the corner.. i would like to have a child or 2), i have chronic lower back pain, rashes in my between my thighs from the friction that sometimes bleeds, and under my breasts as well.. its a whole mess. i feel like i am almost being punished for not having 1 big problem like diabetes or high blood pressure.. instead i have a million little problems that are all adding up fasting that i can count them! The one major little thing with me lately, and sorry if this is TMI.. but.. since my waist as i know it is slowly disappearing, i cant .. ahem.. how shall i say.. twist my torso.. and therefore.. i am unable to properly wipe my own booty!!!!!!! when you stop being able to wipe your own ass.. that was IT for me.. i called the doc right up and scheduled a consultation. I have had freinds who had the surgery, but for years.. i ignored my weight.. and almost had the reverse of anorexia.. i convinced myself that i was sexy, and volumptuous, and that i was just "THICK". well now i know better, and i am taking the first step to a new, healthier, leaner me.. I look forward to hearing from everyone and anyone! Take care!
