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Stripping
Mar 22, 2008
Stripping away your personal touches. I asked Jim if we could sell the house in July( at least put it on the market). He said yes .It was an hollow victory. My mom asked how a felt and I told her I didn’t’, I should have told her I couldn’t. I had to make my point that this house is too empty it’s too big and too much for one person too handle. I started depersonalizing the rec . Room (the first room you see when you come in) . I took down all my Redskins Photos of friends and such. Then I put up memorabilia. Clinton Portis, Camden Yards, Beer signs. Then I went and took down all the wedding photos I had in the guest bedroom. This is something that my guest could remember and smile about. It feels like I too am getting de sensitized. It is not my home it is a house I now have to sell. I even thoughts of the Wisteria I planted when we first came here is something I will have to give up. Jim said it would destroy the fence. I say it will enhance it. I planted a dogwood tree near the house and Jim said it would ruin the foundation..That is the way he is, not seeing the possibility but blaming that act. Too bad for him…he doesn’t get it.
Waiting
Mar 21, 2008
It seems to me that all this life has you do is wait .
Wait till your old enough,
Wait till you have enough money,
Wait till you hit the lottery,
Wait till you have the latest gadget.
Wait an hour before going into the water after eating
Waiting for the ball to drop
Wait for your hopes and dreams to arrive.
Waiting for Godot.
I’m not a good waiter. I rather pursue. At least my dreams…………..
Wait till your old enough,
Wait till you have enough money,
Wait till you hit the lottery,
Wait till you have the latest gadget.
Wait an hour before going into the water after eating
Waiting for the ball to drop
Wait for your hopes and dreams to arrive.
Waiting for Godot.
I’m not a good waiter. I rather pursue. At least my dreams…………..
Wild week
Mar 20, 2008
First on Monday I had My Docotors appointment. He would like to see me at a BMI of 25 . I;m at 26.5 right now. Plus I need to excercise more. My lean body wieght is not good. but I dressed in my lightess dress. I lost 10 lbs since december.
Tuesday was weird- I thought I had a stoke. I was looking at the computer when My eye vision went fractal. Almost as if I was looking through a crystal . I had to get my administrative assistant to take me to urgent care. It started to clear up but then I got a real bad head ache and Naussea. The doctor had me go for a catscan. he said it looked ok. And thought that maybe I just had a migrain. Which I've never had before. But my boss was telling me that people can get Stress migrains. Anyways since then I've been getting very bad sleep with Night sweats and waking up every hour and ahalf. Could be the menopause as well.
Wednesday.- Another High profile President's conversation. Yea! UUGGGG! It's like beating a dead horse. OK people let move on.
Thrusday Today is my Biggest stress day out of the whole week. Made even more so with the Monthly division meeting. Since I have to get the food for the breakfast, do the didvision newsletter and set up the AV......and never ever let you forget your a man cause i'm a womaaaan W-O-M-A-N and I'll say it again.Lord have mercy. I even bought Peeps! See
Tuesday was weird- I thought I had a stoke. I was looking at the computer when My eye vision went fractal. Almost as if I was looking through a crystal . I had to get my administrative assistant to take me to urgent care. It started to clear up but then I got a real bad head ache and Naussea. The doctor had me go for a catscan. he said it looked ok. And thought that maybe I just had a migrain. Which I've never had before. But my boss was telling me that people can get Stress migrains. Anyways since then I've been getting very bad sleep with Night sweats and waking up every hour and ahalf. Could be the menopause as well.
Wednesday.- Another High profile President's conversation. Yea! UUGGGG! It's like beating a dead horse. OK people let move on.
Thrusday Today is my Biggest stress day out of the whole week. Made even more so with the Monthly division meeting. Since I have to get the food for the breakfast, do the didvision newsletter and set up the AV......and never ever let you forget your a man cause i'm a womaaaan W-O-M-A-N and I'll say it again.Lord have mercy. I even bought Peeps! See
Wine & Weight loss
Mar 13, 2008
During the Football season I started drinking wine. Light, White Wine. Why, I use to be a beer drinker, but I learned that beer could hurt my stomach and even make it grow. Because of the carbonation. So that is why I haven’t even had a diet coke or soda since July.
Now back to the wine, I started with the four pack, The little ones. Not bad, but then I could polish off a bottle in a night. Then it got so bad I do one of those 5 liters boxes in two day. Having a small stomach you can get drunk faster But you can also get sober faster. (I wonder how this effects the inebriation test police give you? But I’m not stupid enough to drink and drive.) I’m just stupid enough to drink & email my soon to be ex.
Anyway Mom and I had a good talk I I can’t function in that state. I lose control. I lose vision and goals. That’s great if I’m at a party. Or Vegas with the girls! Not so good when I’m home alone and I have to get up and go to work the next day and I’m feeling sorry for myself. I also note that it doesn’t help with sleep either (having a glass before bedtime). A nice hot bath is a better alternative. I’ve also been watching PBS. I know you guys are laughing right now; But Wayne Dyer and Dr. Amen (talking about the Brain) have a lot of positive messages
I’m not feeling sorry for myself any more. I have plans (without Jim) that I have to make. I have dreams that I know can come true. And now I have to move on. Good , bad, right, wrong ,he said ,she said----------- it doesn’t matter anymore.. I matter. I have potential. This weight loss is a positive tool.
Wine is not!
Now back to the wine, I started with the four pack, The little ones. Not bad, but then I could polish off a bottle in a night. Then it got so bad I do one of those 5 liters boxes in two day. Having a small stomach you can get drunk faster But you can also get sober faster. (I wonder how this effects the inebriation test police give you? But I’m not stupid enough to drink and drive.) I’m just stupid enough to drink & email my soon to be ex.
Anyway Mom and I had a good talk I I can’t function in that state. I lose control. I lose vision and goals. That’s great if I’m at a party. Or Vegas with the girls! Not so good when I’m home alone and I have to get up and go to work the next day and I’m feeling sorry for myself. I also note that it doesn’t help with sleep either (having a glass before bedtime). A nice hot bath is a better alternative. I’ve also been watching PBS. I know you guys are laughing right now; But Wayne Dyer and Dr. Amen (talking about the Brain) have a lot of positive messages
I’m not feeling sorry for myself any more. I have plans (without Jim) that I have to make. I have dreams that I know can come true. And now I have to move on. Good , bad, right, wrong ,he said ,she said----------- it doesn’t matter anymore.. I matter. I have potential. This weight loss is a positive tool.
Wine is not!
My Mom
Mar 11, 2008
Is such a calming force in my life. She has called me almost every day since Jim left. She came down this weekend and we did shopping therapy .Which included lunch and breakfast out. We are taking 2 trips together, one in June to Las Vegas (Infocomm) a conference that I missed last year because of my surgery and we are going to Canton, Ohio to see Darrel Green and Art monk get inducted into the Hall of fame. Go to the luncheon, a tailgate party and the Game Sunday night. She was worried about starting out early Sunday morning to make it up to Ohio so, she suggested that we head up to Wheeling, West Virginia on Saturday. Find a hotel then head up later Sunday. Wheeling has got Slot Machines ;-) go MOM! i just called my nephew , maybe we'd better go to Pittsburg and see Chris and his family instead of wheeling. He said it would be ok to spend the night before Canton.. I can't wait! Anyway it work it got my mind off of things with Jim. And trying to start living a life without him in it. I think I’m going to be OK Marie Osmond said something very profound today. Women need to Climb Mountains instead of crawling in holes. " I'm climbing!
. Oh and just so you know, don’t drinking and email at the same time. Very bad!
By the way she is turning 85 in May!
. Oh and just so you know, don’t drinking and email at the same time. Very bad!
By the way she is turning 85 in May!
Predictions
Mar 07, 2008
When I made up my fist vision board i wanted to be Sara Jessica parker or Like her. Confident, strong, Self assured.
Built on positive images and I put it in my closet, where I would see it everyday.
So I decided I wanted to have another place to go. another Journey, so this is my NEW vision board. Still needs some extras but other wise I like what it says. It is on my refridgerator.
I highly recommend them.
Built on positive images and I put it in my closet, where I would see it everyday.
So I decided I wanted to have another place to go. another Journey, so this is my NEW vision board. Still needs some extras but other wise I like what it says. It is on my refridgerator.
I highly recommend them.
Choices
Mar 06, 2008
In this life we all have choices. What to eat when we get up in the Morning, what to wear. All choices we make on a daily basis, but what about the Choices that we don’t make. The ones that are made for us? The ones we don’t have control over? What do we do about them? The Out of control Choices. How do we handle them? I got a simply unreasonable request for 8 wireless mics this morning. So I asked my office mate if people here on campus thought I could pull these things out of my___. He said to me “Well, we know you can’t do that , because it’s gotten smaller” I just had to sit here and laugh.
It just shows there are now new choices to be made. Like Do I really want to stay here in “The Burg”?
I could go back up to D.C. It’s not like anything is now holding me down. I’d be closer to Mom & Linda No more long commutes to the Redskins Games. I know there are choices to be made, but I don’t have to choose now (at least not about the Moving).. I ‘m making a vision board. It’s how I want to be in the future. I made up one a couple of years ago and everything I put on it has now come to me. I’ll post it tomorrow!
As far as what has happened the past month. I’m blaming it on the Full moon eclipse .
It just shows there are now new choices to be made. Like Do I really want to stay here in “The Burg”?
I could go back up to D.C. It’s not like anything is now holding me down. I’d be closer to Mom & Linda No more long commutes to the Redskins Games. I know there are choices to be made, but I don’t have to choose now (at least not about the Moving).. I ‘m making a vision board. It’s how I want to be in the future. I made up one a couple of years ago and everything I put on it has now come to me. I’ll post it tomorrow!
As far as what has happened the past month. I’m blaming it on the Full moon eclipse .
Old me, New Me,
Mar 05, 2008
Goosebumps
Mar 04, 2008
Today I went out to voluteer @ heritage. what a surprize when I Looked in the Doggies playroom and found these Geeese!
If you want to read about them go here...
http://www.vagazette.com/news/local/va-news3_030108mar01,0,6981127.story
If you want to read about them go here...
http://www.vagazette.com/news/local/va-news3_030108mar01,0,6981127.story
Better days
Mar 03, 2008
It was nice yesterday 70 degree weather. I popped the top on the convertable and drove all over. I like driving with the wind in my face. My hair blowing all over. Not a care in the world. My 2 guest are going into heat. Oh joy. They are going back on Saturday. I've been eating alot these days but and losing weight. Went to walmart and got into a pair of size 8's. Yes I bought them. Hostess makes a blueberry muffin 100 calorie pack only 7 g of sugar. and just the right size! It's going to be a good day!
It's going to be a good day!
About Me
Location
25.2
BMI
Surgery
07/02/2007
Surgery Date
Mar 19, 2007
Member Since
Before & After
rollover to see after photo
Hiding under black
230lbs
