Sami U.

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(all the things I am feeling, running, unknown, sleepliness)
Hello darlings, an update from Sam follows:
I am good, trying to get back in the swing of things with my weight loss program. I gained 20lbs last spring with my short 13 wk pregnancy that ended with a miscarriage in June 09.  Now I want the weight off like yesterday, and I am afriad to try to get pregnant again, but I do want another BABY!
I have an appointment with Dietary next Monday, and I am beginning my food logs again.
My husband is fighting me and himself with the FEAR of having the baratic surgery with Dr. Myers.  He has been seeing Dr. Goldberg and Dr. Myers staff since September 2008 now, and if he doesn't have the surgery by mid March my insurance will force him to start the approval process all over again. SO THAT SUCKS BIG TIME!
I am trying to get him motivaed to have the surgery and feel so much better, but he only seems to see the glass half empty and the loss of income while he is off work!  The entire process with him and his health scares me to death.
I am happy about the good health of my son, he is so smart and does well in school.  I am finished with my MBA program and will graduate on January 3, 2009 on Thomas fifth birthday.
My step-father (whom I consider my father) and my minster J.R. are both in Riverside Methodist hospital right now with life threaten conditions.  So I have been running back and forth from work, home, school to the hospital after I find a babysitter because children under 16 are banned due to the flu in the hosptials.
I hope my world slows down soon, so I can catch my breath. 
I am happy to say that I am having a small amount of sucess getting back into the swing to losing weight, I just have to remember it will not be as easy as it was right after my surgery!
Love
Sam -  when life sends me lemons, I make lemonda now with splenda not SUGAR! LOL :)
I will copy and post this to everyone, because I almost never get on this site anymore.  I need to update my blog and post some pictures.  I have one recently of me in a ball-gown, it looks really good!  I felt like a princess dancing with my son in a ballroom with 300 guest and 26 debutanes that were being presenting for the Polish society club in Pittsburg last weekend.

So I am over the moon with happiness about being pregnant again, but I a worried about the weight gain!  My gosh I went from 174lbs to 192.6lbs in just 12 short weeks.  It is really FAST weight gain, I am trying to slow down and be more careful about what I am eating, how much and how often so that I DON"T need to fight so hard to get back into my tiny size 10 Petites when this baby is born in December 2009.
I am also very BLUE daily, my Dad said that means this will be a GIRL because I am so depressed.  I just want to eat, sleep and not much of anytjhing else right now!
I will write more later, I need to get out of work right now.
Love
Sami Sue
P.S. My little boy is very excited about becoming a BIG brother!

I grew up in Southern Ohio 20 minutes below Cambridge on a horse farm. I lived in centeral California, Mississippi, Texas, Florida and Alaska since I left home and joined the Air Force in 1986. Was stationed at Travis AFB near Fairfield Califiornia for nearly six years from 1986 to 1992 after Desert Storm ended. I enjoyed the Pacific Coast when I could get away from the base on weekends. I liked the Flordia coast, but not as much as the Pacific coast. I only lived in Florida for four months before my first marriage ended, really badly, so I don't think I was appreciating the costal view as much as I may have at other periods in my life.

I love to travel. The coast line in Alaska was near the image of your Maine photo. Except with not nearly as many houses in most locations in Alaska. I lived there for three and half months over the summer of 1997 working in salmon factories for easy cash while on break from Ohio State during my under graduate years. That was one of the best and difficult summers of my adult life. I learned that you can never go back and capture your youth and carefree feelings, but maybe that isn't necessarily a bad thing. I like to remember those times as some of my most happily divorce times in my life...LOL:)

I am so grateful that waited a good 16 years before I married my second husband. It was the best and smartest decision I ever made.

This weekend I had to go buy more pants because my size 12/14 regular sizes are sagging in the butt and waist by mid-day. Gosh this is really starting to get expensive now. I had three pair of pants that I bought back in the spring that I loved, on clearance for $30 year from Ralalph Lauern and now they are to BIG. I am kind of upset, but on the other hand really HAPPY to be wearing a size 10/12 JUNIOR from one of the teen shops as Easton...gosh that was weird taking my little boy into a teen shop dressing room, he was peaking out from under the door looking at all of the young, young girls and smiling from ear to ear. He loves young women because they always stop to talk to his cute little self. He was enjoying it much more than me. I forgot how long young girls spend in the dressing room, I had to wait and wait and wait. There was eight dressing rooms, and we still had to wait. I will wait until I am alone next time, so I can get in and out without Tommy hanging on every other rack of clothes.

Later
Sami Sue

I am 13 months out, started at 274 on August 21, 2007 and today I weigh 168 pounds wearing a size 10P! GOD it feels good. My advise for replacing a wardrobe is the watch the clearance racks like crazy, never pay more than 10 or 20 dollars for new clothes until you get past your one year point because everything will continue to quickly begin to fall off of your body in a few short weeks. Stop wearing any type of sweat clothing because it makes you feels slumpy (is that a real word?) I purchased almost an entire wardrobe in a size 14 this past spring when I stopped losing at 178 pounds. A nice wardrobe, and now it is all BIG, which is wonderful, but I paid to much money for the clothes!!!
I learned to go to all of the 2nd hand clothing stores and pick and select things that wear classical for work until I stop losing weight. GOSH that feels strange to say.
I do buy SHOES, all of the time! I love wearing my high heels now, GOD I look great in four inches heels.
Today I am wearing a cute short waist zebra striped jacket, a little Vera Wang black tank, black Ralph Lauren slacks, and high, high, black shiny Vera Wang shoes with big dimond stud earrings. I must say, I am so darn CUTE.
I am very tired today, spent the weekend on the farm chasing my son and nieces around taking pictures of them for hours in the beautiful fall weather, with the horses, on the wood pile, working with my Dad and brothers. Sometimes I miss the farm after a weekend like this one.

Blessings
Sami Sue

I am loving being a THIN girl, I am having so much fun shopping, and shopping and then shopping some more. The most fun I am having currently is being a mother to my three year old who keeps me busy and being a student, actually have the energy and taking the time to continue my education for my Master degree feels good. I am now at the point of looking at the different job oppurtunity that will be available when I complete my Masters degree. I am looking forward to the increase in PAY.
I am still doing well working with the thearpist every week. My husband is doing OK, not GREAT, not bad, just OK with the entire getting approval for the weight loss surgery process. Currently he is making me crazy, but I guess that is normal when someone is very stressed about decision that they feel hopeless to control. I have hardly discussed the surgery with him outside of him scheduling his different appointments since he went to Dr. Myers office on September 4, 2008. I think that he would actually perfer that I would fight with him, because I HAVE NOT! He has been making me a little crazy.
I need to get back to work. I have to study, buy a new calcultor that will process the power to function (this is not an option on a normal calculator - crap) I hate algerbric formulas. I have been trying to re-do my living room on a budget, not easy to do. I found several nice covers at Bed, Bath and Beyond today at lunch. Now I need to get a extra hand full of money and just go buy the covers and pillow covers to redo my living look style from French Shaby Chic to dark choclate Modern in style.
I am now in a size 10P, bought a great jacket at Talbots last week in a size 10 I was so excited.
Later
Sam

An update on a busy Saturday afternoon. I must devote tomorrow all day for homework and studying for a big exam that I need to take before my class on Wednesday. Once I complete Wednesday at 9:30 PM I will do a little dance and jump for JOY!!!! This class MBA 716 is the must difficult class of the MBA program and is the one class that most students must repeat in order to graduate because they can't maintain a B- or higher. So when I get done with a decent grade I WILL BE SO HAPPY!
I had a great day in thearpy, gosh thearpy works so much better when a person stops and actually listen to the thearpist! In my past I have had thearpy two or three times while in college and in the military, but I never found it to be so helpful as I have now. I am trying to decide if I am just more open to the experience, is it the actual medication that is allowing me to slow down for a few minutes to listen to what the thearpist is actually saying, or what? It is all a mystery to me, I am grateful that I am in thearpy during this time with Stephen getting ready for his surgery. It is so helpful to have someone to talk to about how I am feeling, and someone to help me KEEP MY MOUTH shut about what I think he should or shouldn't being doing to get prepared for surgery. It is a minor miracle that I have been able to get the ball rolling for Stephen and now back away and allow him to follow the process without my in put or master minding the entire situation like I normally do with all other aspects of our lives that I want done in "Just a Certain Way". Gosh, I am such a control FREAK. My thearpist said the "my control freak issue isn't a bad thing" I keep trying to remind myslef of that. The control issue was my waying of coping with an Extrememly difficult childhood that I almost never discuss with others because I don't feel that it is always helpful to blame your present and current behaviours and actions on your childhood. I guess it is helpful to recongize why we behave the way we do in any given situation so that we can change our behaviour in the future. OK I need to get back to my chores.
Later darling, I miss all of you.
Air kisses,
Sami Sue

Thomas my toddler is having minor surgery on his nose on Friday September 26. I am doing so much better and Stephen seems to have really came around about the surgery after his appointments with Dr. Myers and Dr. Tell yesterday. She actually recommended that he begin seeing a counselor in the event that the surgery doesn't go well or he isn't happy about the surgery afterwards she doesn't want him to blame me is what he said. He and I discussed that yesterday for a short while so we will need to sit a little longer and discuss at length but I am relieved that he is on his way and is getting advise from professional about what needs to happen to him and for him to best serve his health. He is down to 272 pounds now with Weight Watchers. Dr. Meyers said that he should have the RNY and didn't recommend the sleeve like we thought which I found interesting. OK I will right more later. I need to find a minute and set and write a long update now that I am past my one year date. I am so happy with the therapy that I began in early July, it is making a huge difference with everything right now from school, work my marriage and my sanity!
My right breast is almost all healed now from two different biopsy in August except the other day it turn a funny green color after being clear of bruises for nearly a week. It made me laugh, I asked Stephen if he thought it might fall off with the weird green color. He looked so alarmed when I asked, it made me laugh harder. OK I am at work and must get back to it. I am up in Delware volunteering with the United Way Campighn on Tuesday Sept 16 all day. School is going really well, I only have two more classes to get through of this accounting. YEAH and one more test.
Love
Sami Sue

My husband is having his first two appointments this week. He is still very undecided, but getting all of the appointments done in case he makes up his mind to get it done before the end of the year. We have a big insurance cost issue that he needs to decide before December 31, 2008 to have the surgery or it could end up costing us a great deal more.
So I am sending prayers that this is the right thing to do for him and our family.
Actually we just had words "ahahah" if you know what I mean about money and his need to take off work Friday for this doctors appointment. MEN make me crazy, small business owners are the worst when it comes to planning things and covering expenses. I feel like I must save every extra penny to pay for everything related to this surgery because he is being so difficult. I swear I am going to lose my mind soon if he doesn't do something about his weight and health issues. I driving around worried about becoming a HOT THIN widow, I was being ficeishes if you didn't catch on that...I have to go now more later on this saga!
Love Sami Sue

Today I weighed 171 pounds, horray. The best thing today is that I am wearing a size 10 dress that I have not worn since college like 12 yrs ago. Gosh it feels so good. My husband said "I would do you" that really made me laugh.

I am currently having issues with my mouth and an imbalance where I continue to have a flat weird taste. None of my doctors can figure out why, the only relief I have recieved is from advise I got from some health food people who told me to take liquid vitamin B and liquid vitamin D and place it under my tongue to go straight to my blood stream and into my brain. Strange as it sounds, it is the only thing that is helping. Now I am trying to figure out this mouth imbalance issue.

Later
Sami Sue

Life is good, I am down to 172.4 as of this past Sunday. I have a second OPEN biopsy scheduled next Friday Aug 22 to remove all of the cells because they are the kind that they worry about turning into cancer as I age according to what they are telling me. It is not cancer, but is the kind of cells that they like to remove. So I will have a minor out patient surgery on Friday rest over the weekend and return to work Monday August 25 like new.
Stephen hasn't talked much about his weight watchers, my biggest concern is keeping him on schedule at this point. My insuarance plan is not nice if you miss a week during the 12 wks required.
Love and blessing
Sami Sue
P.S. Started counseling for eating issues, it is going really well after just four weeks, I feel like I am making big strides with why I have been eating my way through all of my stress in life.