Monday, August 31st, 2009

Aug 30, 2009

Another month has passed and I wonder where all the time goes.  I had so many blog worthy moments this month but never took the time to sit down and right about them.  I'll try to summarize my month in a few words.

I started the month having recently arrived in Onederland.  At the time I had a closet still full of clothes and because it was a mess, I wore the same 3 or 4 things over and over again.  This month I cleaned out my closet and only put back what fits.  It left me with 3 pairs of pants and 2 jeans.  I have about 20 shirts since those are easier to "fit" with tucking in, etc.... I had about 6 pairs of panties.  I bought the panties at Target and WalMart for like $5 a pack...gotta love that!  I am in size 8 panties.  Can't wait until I'm in size 8 pants!  For now, I'll wear my baggy 14s. 

The one bra I had was sort of loose in the cup and left my deflated boobs needing some additional support.  I went in to Lane Bryant to try on bras since this is what I had been doing for 15 years or more.  I did fit in the smallest DDD they had.  I got a 38DDD in the Balconette.  I love that bra and it keeps my boobs sitting where there supposed to be, so it is sort of sad for me that I have to find a new bra store.  While I was there though, I did try on a pair of 14 pants and decided against them because for a couple of reasons.  
1. I can buy 14s anywhere, so why should I buy them from LB
2. They were $25, and I haven't paid more than $12-$15 for any article of clothes (except shoes) since surgery and probably won't again.
3. They were a bit loose and it was the smallest size they had!!!!
All in all, my very last  Lane Bryant shopping experience was fine.  I got what I needed and walked out thinking I'll never go in there again, God willing, and now I've got to find a new place to call home.  

Sometime during the month I heard the carb monster calling my name.  I've never been a carb dodger and have always enjoyed them without limitations as long as they were from whole grains, dairy or vegetables.  On occasion, I'd enjoy some frozen yogurt or NSA ice cream, which is a lot of sugar or sugar like products, but all in all, I don't run around avoiding them.  There was a day or two in there though that I had some chips from On the Border, a bit of sausage and beef lasagna and a yummy yeast roll fresh from the oven.  What it did for me was make me realize what my role is in my life.  I can choose to eat these tasty items in moderation, I can avoid them and be afriad, or I can eat them in darkness and feel remorseful afterwards.  My preferred path is moderation and holding myself accountable to what I eat and then offsetting it with some exercise or weights later.  So far, so good, but the thougths led to some additional self reflection and I'm guessing my surgery got me here and I'm going to be the one to carry me the rest of the way.  I've sort of felt the load being transferred for some time, and it's like now I'm riding my bike along and realize my dad isn't holding my seat anymore. "Look dad, no training wheels...I'm doing it all on my own!" I don't know how much of it is true, but I like to think I've got some control on my life and I've really learned a lot.  I also know I can fail, but I'm not letting that be an option.

I am spending a lot of time outdoors with my puppy.  Having someone or something depend on you is a selfless thing and that is not something I've ever done very well.  Little Scout leaves me no choice and I'm becomming a better person for it.  He's softened my heart a bit and is such a joy in my life.  We go on walks every day and he's helping me from being lazy and I'm helping him grow up to be a strong beautiful lab.  What a great relationship.   Scout and I went to visit my dad this weekend and he was a joy to have around.  He played with my stepmoms schnauzer all day and night until they were both too pooped to get up and eat.  I've never seen Scout so mellow and I can't wait to take him back. 

It was great seeing my dad.  He hadn't seen me since March, about 80 days post op.  I've lost another 75 or so pounds since then and he was amazed.  I am trying to set a good example for him since he's a bit over weight and diabetic.  I worry about him and his eating but no it isn't my business, so I can only teach from example.  I love my daddy and only want the best for him.  I am really looking forward to going back soon since I know Scout won't be a problem to travel with.

So with all that, I've had a great month.  I've lost another 7.5 pounds since it started and wait for it...wait for it....I'm officially "moderatly overweight" according to the OH BMI chart.  

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About Me
Allen, TX
Location
28.3
BMI
RNY
Surgery
12/01/2008
Surgery Date
Dec 25, 2006
Member Since

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