saraweeks

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Happy april fools. I just got home from my Nut vist and i have acheived my first goal i lost a total of 12 LBS in six weeks to show that i am making changes to my nut. I am very happy with my acomplishment and have set my next goal, I want to lose another 10lbs in the next six weeks to show dr. todder that i am a good candidate for surgery. lets see how i do.

WELL i LOST 5LBS SO FAR AND I HAVE TWO WEEKS BEFORE MY NEXT NUT VISIT. I HAVE BEEN DEALING WITH A LOT OF EMOTIONS SUCH AS DO I REALLY WANT TO HAVE SURGERY? I AM NOT AFRAID OF SURGERY AT ALL. I AM A LITTLE FEARFUL OF WHAT WILL HAPPEN IN 40 YEARS. THERE ISN'T A LOT OF STUDIES ON THE LONG TERM EFFECT OF GBS. PLUS A LITTLE PART OF ME BELIEVES ITS NOT GOING TO WORK FOR ME. I KNOW THAT SOUNDS STUPID BUT I HAVE STRUGGLED FOR SO LONG AND I AM A SKEPTIC.

OK, i am over my pissed off depression that i need to wait another 6 weeks to get a referral from my nut to see DR. TODDER. Thanks to a post from another OH member I found the DAILYPLATE!!!! I love this site, I cant believe its free. Thank GOD some one made this site free, I cant afford another membership to another diet site. I am determined to lose 10 lbs between now and April 1st.  I will be victorious!!!!!!!

UHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am soooooooooo angry!! So i gained 1/2 lbs from my first Nut apointment to the next. My NUT said no i will have to see you again in 6weeks. Its not going to take me 6 weeks to lose one friggen pound. Iam sure this will put off my surgery date for at least an extra month!!  I dont have much to say, just pissed!!!!!

The waiting is getting to me!!! It is so depressing, I am trying to achieve my goal but i keep defeating my best intentions at every attempt to try to lose weight. This is why I wanted to have gbs any way, I cant lose weight by my self! I need this tool, before I 'am handicapped by my weight. I just want to hide under a rock somewhere until i get a surgery date.

I just want to be normal. I was thinking today what it would be like to not have the burden of being over weight. I have always been obese,  I don't know what it is like to be a normal size. I want to go shopping and get new clothes that express my style, but right now i have to get what fits. I want to go to Mexico and lay on the beach with a stiff drink in my hands, but I feel out of place and unattractive. I want to sit in any waiting room chair and not worry if its going to fit my but,or if it might break god forbid!!! 

http://www.youtube.com/urjunk78

Well, I chose to make a you tube video blog of my WLS journey. I love taking pictures, or video of my family and friends, but I like having my picture taken as much as getting a root canal. I avoid a camera like the black plague One day at work a very dear friend of mine took a picture of me when i was off guard. I took a look at the sneaky shot and my heart broke! "THAT'S ME", I secretively thought to my self. Who was this fat old lady looking back at me from the view finder? That's when i decided to take monthly pictures of my self. Taking pictures and video of my self is like weighing your self weekly, it keeps you in check. actually its a slap square in your face of reality.

Well, I am still waiting for a surgery date. I am getting closer!!  I have been to my nut *2, physical therapy, support group* 2, pre sleep study and the sleep study, I had my blood drawn to prove i don't smoke any more. All i have left is my phsyc eval on the 25 of feb. Once i finish with that then i can see the surgeon, get a surgery date and get insurance approval. I started a vlog on YOU TUBE if any one is interested its @ urjunk78.  I started the video blog so that I can see my self and the weight loss once i have surgery. Plus all the brave souls that tracked there weight loss on you tube have really helped me in this journey. I am just giving back. check it out! lol sara

 one year  has passed since I decided that WLS was what I needed to become a healthy person. 
I went to my PCP Dec of 2007 and was referred to Vanderbilt WL Surgical center in Nashville
TN.  I went to a introductory meeting at Vanderbilt and was then positive that WLS was for me.  Then I hit my first road block, Insurance!  My Insurance plan had a WLS exemption clause. I was devastated, I decided the world was cruel and I gave up. Meanwhile I gained 20-30lbs. I was so frustrated!  I pleaded with HR to carry an insurance plan with out the WLS exemption.  No deal, the small business couldn't afford the change in insurance. I then decided to find a job that didn't have a WLS exemption in there benefits package.  I found that job! Now one year later i finally have the first piece of the puzzle, an insurance plan that covers WLS (when medically necessary or when your BMI is over 50).  I moved from Nashville to Maine and found a new PCP that refer ed me to Eastern Maine Medical Center Weight loss surgery center. I have attended their intro to WLS meeting, two support group meetings and have appointment for physical therapy, dietitian, phsyc eval, sleep study, and the surgeon. I am hoping to have a date for surgery some time this spring/early summer. That is upon the approval of my surgery by my insurance provider which is now ATNA.