Ali Globe

Dec 06, 2007

    

Baby Update

May 26, 2007

Some of you have been asking so I thought I would update..

The baby is due Sept 3rd...26 weeks down 14 weeks to go.

Time really does fly I woke up thinking the other day oh no I have 14 weeks I'll never be ready by then...lol. 

I'm feeling good most days sometimes I have issues with the heat but haven't passed out yet.

We decided when we got pregnant we didn't want to know the sex till he or she came because we don't want stuck with all Blue or all Pink and in my family thats what happens at the shower...lol

The First Year..Post- op

Nov 03, 2006



09/05/05
Well tomarrow is the day,I'm all set, packed and everything,just have to wait for the clock to reach 4 am so I can get up and get ready to go.I'll be home fiday 09/09/05 if everything goes well so I should be posting again friday.

Thank you to so many of you who have contributed to this journey and God bess you all in yours.
Hugs,
Shel




09/12/05
I'm back home again, the surgary went uneventfully ,I was in the hospital till friday the 9th,I went for my 1 week post op apt today and lost 3 lbs and becouse i kept a food diary since i have been home they were able to explain that i needed to increase my water intake becouse i am on lasex still i need to put enough in for my body to know to get rid of it,Also the more I get moving the better the fluid flushing will get.
Also I need to double my protine intake so my body knows to start letting go of stuff I don't need.

The rest of my staples got removed today and I go back in a few days to get the drain removed.I'm off surgical meds and on liquid tylonal for pain, all that realy hurts is my back now that the staples are out I'm moving around more.
 It kinda sucks that I can't do anything i'm used to. No dishes, laundry,cleaning , you know daily stuff but hay gives me more time for walking,,,,hehehe

Someone asked me if I was glad I had this surgary and I said how the heck should I know I just had it less then a week ago and I'm still drugged........lol

More to come...

09/14/05
I went and got my drain out today and did an "official" 1 week post op weigh in.... -16 lbs.



Weight Chart moved to profile



10/12/05
Yesterday was 5 weeks post op, I feel good, I been walking more.
With the 17 lbs of fluid gain from the I.V. that I have had to lose I'm down 57 lbs. I figured it was time to update and maybe even ad a pic, it's not the best pic but it's a pic...lol

I went on real food today, I had some chicken and some mixed fruit in  pear juice, and oven backed squash. so far so good, other then that I stuck with stuff I'm used too......lol

5Weeks post op pic on right...

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11/04/05
It's been 8 tuedays and almost 2 months by calander date, i'm going by tuesdays. I'm down to 360 now and can eat almost anything i want, not that i do though.
I still have trouble one day with foods that were previously no problem it defanitly is  trial and error.
I'm still not ever hungry although when I don't eat by 4 hour periods I do get an uncomfortable pain in my left side to remind me...lol
I also took an 8 week pic to add.

November

Well It's November now and I'm still doing pretty well with the eating and walking.
When the weather is nice outside I walk around the corner and down the block,
Sometimes on a good day I walk to the store a couple blocks away and set and
have a decaf coffee to take a break before I walk back.


I still use the protine shakes twice a day , I tried Tuna Fish but it doesn't settle well,
It feels more like I swallowed a rock. I do eat things like eggs,sometimes they work
sometimes not, just a side effect of things healing i guess.

Some things I can eat without alot of trouble are : cottage cheese, mushroom soup,
turkey, string cheese, mashed potatoes,90%fat free hamburger , refried beans,jello
and pudding , most of the things are SF(sugar free) and FF(Fat free) I drink stuff like
Skim milk,decaf tea and decaf coffee, walmart version of crystal lite in grape and
 peach tea and of course  water water water.

As far as healing I have all the drains and staples and everything out,I have been cleared
 to go back to normal activities with the exception of not lifting more then 30 lbs at a time.
I still feel tired but with just having major surgury that is to be expected now n then and I
have lost some inches also.

I got to drive at 4 weeks and now that I am recovered from surgury this far I have been taking
my mother to the doctors and for stress tests and such for chest pains, She has blockage in her
heart and needs to go in for a heart cathiterization Nov 25th.
Turns out they put her in the hospital the 21st for kidney problems and did the Cath the 25th and then
they did a Triple bypass surgury on Nov 28th.



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December

Here it is a new month, Due to the fact my mom was in the hospital we cancled Thanksgiving till she
 gets home, So I didn't have to juggle that hurdle of what not to eat that day,We plan to have dinner
when she does get home though.With going to the hospital everyday I'm doing good with the
walking it's a long walk from the parking lot to the elivator and then to the end of the hall, but they say
mom should be leaving for home soon. I made a salad at the cafateria and it didn't settle well the day
of her heart Cath so I decided to wait awhile before trying that again. Eating has been a challange
becouse of being at the hospital most all day long but I have stuck to things like mashed potatoes, yogert
turkey and cheese sticks must be doing something right becouse I am still losing pounds and inches.


As far as the drinking goes I have been drinking mostley decaf coffee and decaf tea becouse those
are free at the hospital. When we get lunch I get a milk to take with me and drink later, and when I remember
I take water with me in the car to have for the day. I counted the steps frommom's room to the general parking
spot in the parking lot and it is about 750-800 steps one way. I do that walk to the car 4-6 times a day , no
wonder I am still losing pounds and inches..lol

We brought mom home around the 10th but she went back to the hospital the next day becouse of the fact
that her dialisis cathiter was not working so she spent another week there and then they sent her to a
nursing home to do rehab before she could come home but they told us she could spend the day at home
either christmas day or christmas eve day and then it would be about a week and she would be home for
good around the 1st of January. I still got my walking in at the nursing home though up and down the halls
and i would do excersizes with her during the rehab excersize sessions. Now that she is closer to home I
have been eating more "normal" and drinking more water and crystal light , still losing 20 lbs a month.


My mom ended up with an infection on the 21st that sent her back to the hospital and She passed away On
Dec 22. She made me promise to have Christmas weather she was still in the hospital or in the nursing home
and since I promised we had Christmas anyway....for the kids. I didn't eat much after she died I live mostley on
water and milk becouse of the knot the saize of a baseball where my little golf ball tummy is, even a protine
shake hurts and comes back up.







January

I found out while making funeral arraingmants that My mother had no Insurance So not only did I suddenly lose
my mom now i will be losing our home too, Alot of people are telling me "it's just a house, let it go" Now I have
30 days to clean it out before they forclose it and take everything away. I'm not eating and I could care less
about excersizing, unless you count spending everyday sorting and packing away my mothers life. This month
 I have only lost 10 lbs I'm sure the surgon won't be happy with that but I don't realy care at this point.
I went to my pcp and she gave me Atavan for nerves it seems to be helping becouse I am eating a bit now and then
and I don't cry and shake all day everyday.


I need to find a way to get refocused on my surgury and health becouse right now I just don't care about anything
and I know in my head that I should.





Hi all I know long time no update...I'm sorry bout that life was busy with taking care of my mom (also my hero) She passed away Dec 22nd.


I'm back to taking care of me again and loseing again and I also have Pic updates too.


This pic was taken the night before my wedding...05/04
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This one was taken Today... 02/06
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this one taken09/05
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And my new face pic as of 02/05/06..5 months as of tomarrow
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My 6 month pic aken 3/06
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03/22/2006

well in the last 6 months I have lost as of today 93 lbs according to the surgons office, my pre op weight was 418 and today I was at 325.

I'm not to worried about the lack of being 100 lbs lost yet I still think 93 lbs is great concidering the the emotional and physical stresses I have been under the last 3-4 months.
I have gone from a size 56 bra to a 44 46 depending on the make , the sweater I put on today was a 2 X, and the pants are a 2xor 24/26

I am on NO meds now for blood sugar or high blood preasure, I'm losing MEGA inches, and although I lost my baby march 10th After 20 yrs of not being able to concieve I now know I can thanx to this surgury and the weight loss it has helped me achieve.

I have now been cleared to go back to my normal activity so I will be walking and lifting weights again and back to being a loser....





Posted at 5:32 AM PST on 04/17/2006

~Weekly Weigh In~

surgery weight 418
current weight 318
goal weight ???
total lost 100lb
Today I became a member of the "century club"

I posted this the same month on the on the "september board"

This surgury is a big usless waste of time !!
Original Post by Shelly T at 5:31 AM PST on 04/05/2006


No not realy, but now that youve clicked here you may as well keep reading.....lol

I hear alot of people say this or that thier surgury didn't work or thet they can still eat this or that .

At times like that or like now with us on the september board, It's NOT the surgury , IT did what it was suppost to do or we wouldnt all be losing as much as we have.

What happened to our commitment, to our driving force...

9-12 months ago we would have moved heaven and earth to get this surgury done, and we did, and got it done ,

6-9 months ago we were watching what we were eating and doing and we had a plan that we stuck to (mostley) ,

3-6 months ago we began to relax, wow this is working, even if i don't walk or work out EVERY day I still get to lose,and i can sneak (insert bad thing here) and it won't make much difference.

3 months ago to today... the excuses snuck in...Oh I know I'm not suppost to have (insert bad thing again) but I just can't help it. I would walk or workout today but it's just to....cold, rainy, snowey,hot,My life got to busy and so on so I'll do it tomarrow okay maybe the next day if it's a nice day and I have time.

NOW!! at least for me....I'm done with excuses,If I could jump through hoops and work so hard to make time to get this surgury I'm not going to waste it. If I could convince myself 6 months ago I didn't need the (insert bad things here) I can do it again , and if I could make time a yr ago to wait in a medical office to get through whatever procedure I had to have to get this surgury done then I can make time to walk or work out.

We are going into month 7 , It's time to renew our commitment to follow up care with this surgury. Knowing what to do isn't enough , If it was none of us would had this surgury. Just becouse we CAN doesn't mean we SHOULD (insert bad habit or excuse here).

It's easy to make excuses and blame others but it boils down to WE had this surgury so WE could make a change, well lets not waste it.Lets recommit, not tomarrow, not next week but NOW right now lets get out driving forse back out and make the difference we wanted in the first place.

Okay who's with me??




05/12/2006
~Why do this to yourself~

When I was pre op I would tend to do things cuz it was easy,Like sit and watch the kids play outside, bring food in by my chair to eat all throughout the day cuz it was easier then cooking and preparing it , just to tireing,
things like that.

Now 8 months post op I usualy do things becouse it is a challange I try to cook meals that are good for me and also appealing to hubby.
I walked a mile one days to pay bills and get to the bank just to see how long it would take (45 min) 1 mile one way and 3 different stops,I also do more in an avrage day then I used to in a week .

Today I did yard work, I inhareted my mothers house and I havent done any major yardwork in 5 yrs here , today I seperated and planted a dozen lillys along our property line and trimmed the the pine tree branches to 6 ft high instead of hanging almost to the ground, raked under them, sawed off some saplings, watered the garden and rose bush, did the dishes made my version of chicken parmasan and cleaned my bedroom, sure i'm tired, BUT at least now I get tired by doing it and not just wishing I could..lol





Have you tried this??
I thought this was kinda neet...and wanted to share it.

http://www.thedoctorslounge.net/calc/bsa.htm






Will This RUIN my marriage??

Being 71/2 month out from surgury I can tell you that most people gain so much more then they lose, what is it your afraid of losing? As far as being afraid of dying well most of the people arn't afraid of dying at all , they are afraid of living and of change.

I also don't think thet a relationship gets stronger or weaker becouse of the surgury, it has more to do with who we are as a person, some get more confident and stronger and don't want or need thier mate anymore becouse they find new self worth, some have mates who are only with them becouse they are fat,insecure and controlable and when that changes they leave,some get so wrapped up in the dinamics of the surgury and such that they don't make time to keep that bond strong, some it only gets better as time goes on, it's an indevidual personal thing.







What are you eating? Help?
Response from Shelly T at 11:11 AM PST on 06/13/2006
Neer Lake Erie, PA � RNY (09/06/2005) � Rodolfo Arreola, MD


yesterday I had
1 protine shake
1 granola bar
turkey, 2 cheese sticks
1/2 c spinach 1/4 c blackberries

today so far I have had
1/4 of a protine shake
2slices turkey and a cheese stick grilled on 1 slice of whole grain bread,
gave most of the bread to the dog though.

I make up the protine with equal amount of ff milk and drink it throughout the day.

Some other things i use are cottage cheese,rocotta cheese,sour cream,cream cheese,potted meat,beef n beans like in a taco,penut butter,peaches,pears,blackberries

My surgon is gonna freak next week, he had me add the shake just for the fact I don't get in much "food" so I don't think the shakes hurt too much at this point.






I have more Pics on Yahoo 360 so I don't take to much space up on this page...the link is...

http://360.yahoo.com/toyz_r_us_girl2002
Enjoy!





06/16/06
Well it's been just over 9 months now and I think things are finally sinking in, This realy does work!!




This was me a couple weeks ago...

I had more pics taken yesterday while I was trying on cloths to see what fit now, yes it's only been a month and I'm changing my wardrobe again..lol
Most everything is 22's and 1-2xl now.
I thought maybe the pics would help me see what everyone else is seeing.
Some of the stuffI just didn't like on me so I'll be thinning those ones out the door too.

When mom passed away I gave away most everything under a size 24 cuz I honestly at the time thought I would never get smaller then that.

Good thing my friend who had the surgury in July started in a size 26 and is giving me the left overs.......hehe I shouldn't have to shop now till I'm a size 10.

Maybe I'll go later and put up a few new pics. I took one of me in hubbys favorite redwings jersy, that way he could have a pick of both his loves.........

Me a couple days ago.......

I found a dress today I fell in love with but with losing sizes so often I wasn't gonna pay $28 for it.

It was black and cotton gauzy type material had colorful flowers but didn't look like a garden and i said can i try it on, knowing it would never fit yet and lemme tell ya I looked freakin awsome in it, i almost cried right in the store but not if it won't fit in 2 weeks it's not worth $28

So I hung it up and came home with a smile that didn't cost me a thing.

Today....

I got the dress!!!
I went and asked the woman if I could just take pics in it since I wouldn't be wearing it enough to buy it at $30, She said yes.
After trying the dress on and the pics, she told me how proud she was of me and all the work I had done to get this far,And how beautiful it made me look when I lit up wearing that dress, Then she told me for all my hard work She wanted to make sure I got such a special reward and offered me the dress for $10.........I got the dress !





07/14/06
Well here it is another month gone by, just about 10 1/2 months out now.
It's almost 4 am in my world and I seem to do all my best thinking after the rest of the world goes away.

If you notice I still don't have a century card on my profile...

Someone asked me how I could lose 100 lbs and not be extreamly happy and proud of myself.

Well it's not the tipical experience for me. The first 60 lbs  no one realy noticed becouse I started out at over 400, then by the time people started to notice instead of wow your looking good i would hear how sorry they were my mom was sick,my mom died, i lost my baby(same week I made century club), or my hubby was gone(it's temporary) but all the goals that should have been enjoyed and celibrated were met by painful and depressing moments.
In all honesty if i could take all the weight back and it would would reverse these last 10 months I would be tempted to concider it . I wouldn't do it , but i would give it a second thought.

I'm hopeing the next 10 months is more of a celibration for me...





I am losing an avrage of 10-11 lbs a month and I'm fine with that becouse it is still comming off.

I have things sagging in places I couldn't even find bones in before surgery.

I wanted to be in a size 20 by July 4th , it didn't happen cuz just when I thought i was almost there my body did this whole droop and sag and reshape thing.

To some those all might sound like bad things but you know a yr ago none of them would have been possible, at all, and now they are just one step closer to being a thinner more active me. so it IS a good thing.





7/25/06
Well it's not the 4th but I got in the size 20's

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


Can we say WOW..


The First Year..Pre op

Nov 03, 2006



           
"FAITH is knowing it , Even when you can't SEE it

!"


09/22/0...I have been contemplating this surgery for about 3 yrs now but was putting it off in hopes my life would take other directions(wife,mommy,stuff like that)Due to varied medical reasons the mommy thing is out so theres not really any reason left to wait So...I have decide it's time my outside looked like the me i feel is hidden inside.I also have a friend going 10/04 to see about getting her referral so we can do this with the buddy system.




09/24/04... Went to my PCP yesterday and we talked about the surgery and she said she would send the paperwork through for the referral and see what happens.Weighed in at 442.




09/30/04....Got a call from my PCP's office today , I have an appointment on 11/15/04 To go and see Dr.Arreola for the 1st consultation. I felt kinda happy and also kinda nervous at the same time.



10/05/04
I figured out this morning if i set goals of losing 10% of my weight each time,this is what it would look like from 442.
442(10'05'04),397.8(09'05),358.1(11'08'05),322.3(03'28'06),290.1(06'25'06),261,234,211.5,190.5,and 171.5
i stopped at 171.5 because i want to stay around 170,hopefully i will remember to come back at each of those goals and put in the date of that goal.



10/09/04
Hi all , just popping in to update,nothing much is new.
Went to my mom's house to help her with flea control,she had Lazer eye surgery so i help out as much as i can.
  My cousin was there , she is 7 yrs old but way wise,She wanted to discus my surgery with me , I didn't tell her ,her mother did.
So we sat down on the couch and talked.

She told me that she watched a video of my surgery and wanted to explain it to me so i wouldn't be scared....so sweet.

This surgery through a 7 yr olds eyes...
they are going to make you get out alot of blood to make sure your not sick just fat ,then they take you to a big room and make you go to sleep,when you go to sleep they poke holes in your tummy and then they cut your guts but you don't bleed cuz they tie them together again and then they cut your inside tummy in half and get string and tie your extra guts to your left over inside belly and move the other one on your side.
Then when you wake up you get to drink tea and water and jello and you get to eat popsicles now too, then after months and months you can eat the same food like a baby, and your fat goes and goes and goes and one day it just makes a big POP and poof it will be all gone.
THEN..you won't be betic,or tired or to tired to go places(she doesn't understand thats because of agraphobia) and stuff.
The whole time she is giving me visuals with hand movements and such,I asked her if i would be skinny like sissy , her sister is about 130 lbs, and she said well noooooooo you wont have that big ball in your tummy like sissy cuz she is pregnant and your not. you will just be skinny.....LOL

Well anyway thats how my day went. kinda cute just had to share.





10/15/04
Hi all,My friend got news yesterday that her referral to the surgeon got through so she will be doing the buddy system with me.
THANK YOU AIRKAAAAAAAAH !!!
hehee





10/16/04
This is a poem I wrote the other day after waking up from a very wierd dream:

   ~Silly Worm~
Butterfly come fly with me,
Lets show them now what we can be.
Out of this cocoon it's time to fly,
Tell this shell one last goodbye.

With friends and family and God above,
Don't be afraid , emerge with love.
It's been far to long since we decided to hide,
Lets show them now the beauty inside.

No longer just some silly worm so round,
No more hiding on the ground.
It's time to show the true beauty at last,
Time to let go of all the past.
Don't be worried no reason for scare,
Through all of this i will be there.
Lots of changes are on the way,
Tomorrow brings a brand new day.

I looked into the inside and I did see,
That silly round worm was really me.
Now I'll get some rest I'll need it soon,
For busting out of that old cocoon.








10/27/04
Hi again..
Just having one of those reflective days , My friend and I were talking yesterday about the "moment" we knew that we were headed on this journey for sure.
For me it was a night that i was setting and feeling sorry for my fat self , back hurt,legs hurt, i wanted to go for a nice long walk and clear my head, but couldn't. I believe in fate and destiny and all that stuff so when i went take a shower and go to bed I was looking in the mirror,and to be honest it pissed me off,If i could feel her and on line be thought of as her ,then why couldn't i see her , why couldn't I help her be, Be who? Be me!
No I'm not talking bout a super model or a rich dynamic example for people to admire, I just wanted to be me , the me I feel like in my head. Strong,independent,full of energy,able to go for long walks ,dance all night,hike in the woods,work out 2 hours a day.
 So right then i decided i was gonna put it in Gods hands I did everything I could think of at that point except cutting my stomach open and letting her excape like some scene from alien,thank god i hadn't lost all sanity cus i may have just tried it...lol

I went to the bathroom and turned on the radio, heard part of a song and then the electric went out, no music,no lights,no hot shower, just me and that piece of song alone in the dark to connect.
This is that piece of the song.....

So doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe me something?
A day in the life of someone else

"Cause I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself,
so irritating
Don't want to be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else"

~Pink~Don't let me get me~

Then it came to me I had been offered this opportunity and passed it up (canceled) and moved away from family and friends and life to find out who i was,well I am her,and i want to let my outside look like my inside feels, yes i know it won't be easy,yes I know I may even die,but if this is what they call living could dying be much different? wasn't I already pretty much dead?
Yep I am her and I am going for this surgery,and I am going to live,but most importantly of all "I AM" and while I am I refuse to waste any more time dying to be alive...




11/03/04
Well I went to the doctor today to get blood results and talking a bit more about the surgery ,She is only my pcp but she is as into learning all she can about the pros and cons of the surgery so she kinda quizzed me today on what she had been reading up on, I passed hehe
then we went over my blood work i get every 3 months i had elivated heart enzymes she thought was do to the flu so she had it redone, it only dropped .2 not good, then my triglisorieds were over 250 not good,my Ha1c test (3 month sugar levels for diabetics) was up to 6.8 not good either
She told me that the discomfort in my chest is because of the raised triglisoried and the enzymes .
I Came home with 4 new prescriptions one of which was effexor rx, and she also told me to get fish oil gel caps and take 1000 mg twice a day and the oral b-12 vitamine complex. She also wants me to do a stress test after i have been on the meds for about 4 weeks and re due the blood work.
she also told me that not smoking was no longer optional so as of now I'm a non smoker,she has been leanient about that the last few months.
she also said this surgery is no longer an option but a matter of medical nesessity ,she wants me as stable medically as possible by the time i get bloodwork done for pre op.
ok i think I'm done whining




 

11/16/04
Hello again,
I went to my consultation yesterday,It was very informative and the doctor is an awsome man.
My official Pre-weight is now 429 ,they also took three measurements...Neck(20 in)waist(65 in) and Hips(70 in ),they took pictures,one front and one side.
My insurance requires a 6 month doctor documented diet,which is ok because I have been following the same low fat low salt diet as hubby and giving her weights with each visit so that is already done.
the testing I need is :
pulmonary function test....DONE
nutritional evaluation........DONE
blood work for abg,cxr,T3,T4,Tsh....DONE
an ekg........DONE
a psych eval.......DONE
and a sleep study eval- he's not sure I'll need the sleep apnea test.......DONE
I was happy with everything there yesterday until they scheduled the sleep apnea eval,It wont be until Feb 8th.....DONE
When I got home I had spent so much time at my apt I missed getting my cardiac echo done, so I called to reschedule and I do that on Friday now......DONE
Yesterday evening my PCP's office called to see how everything went,when I told them the sleep study was in Feb,the girl asked if i could call and get it changed and if not if i could schedule it myself at another hospital,All the other tests i need to do can be done within a month.
So I will be on the phone all day today scheduling this and that...lol




3/22/05
Well here I am again , i know it has been awhile...sorry
I have gotten most of my testing done , the sleep study was scheduled for April 7th but they called and now it is tonight...wow tonight already, All i have left to do is the blood gas and the lung testing , I even quit smoking too.
Will update again tomorrow.




NEET STUFF
http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/weightloss.phtml
http://www.tickerfactory.com/ezticker/ticker_designer.php




3/27/05
Well my last test to be done is the pulmonary function test and that will be done the 31st, then I just have to wait for the aproval.
I have made arrangements with everyone i need too concerning hospital stay and aftercare and such, We are just all waiting now.




Just want to say THANK YOU ! to Brandi for all her help,she did an awsome job.




3/28/05
I woke today with jitters i guess you would say, my last test is in a couple days then i just have to wait for the surgeon to call.
I woke up with a zillion things going through my mind, mostly "what if's"
I know it will all be okay but I'm starting to get nervous is all.






3/31/05
I'm DONE!!
I did my last tests for my pre op testing...The blood gas and the pulmanary tests. Even better news is that when I explained to the girl that they were the LAST 2 tests i needed before it could be turned into to insurance and scheduling a date , she said they would be into the doctors office and the surgon by 2pm today !!

Boy was I in for a let down this afternoon , seems that there was a problem with my stress test and now I must do a heart cath,and also from someone I know going through this too , we are also required to weigh in a doctors office at least once a month and talk about our weight issues, I think i have been there every month but if not do I start all over again and wait ANOTHER six??
I am SOOOOOOO frustrated about all this, and i was this >--< close too





"Life is sacred, no matter how painful"....Pope John Paul 2





04/14/2005
Well I get to go see the cartiologist 04/27 and he will decide if i need to have the catheterization done....more waiting..lol
I think i'm getting good at this patience thing ok maybe not.
Has anyone actualy drivin thier doctor insane with thier impatience...hehe

On another note I went to a support meeting last wed. I liked it, informative and caring,although by the time my friend and i finally got into the building(somehow the doors got locked) it was about 1/2 over, we do intend to go again though.





04/18/05

I posted this on the msg board and thought it would be good to add here also for lurkers and the curious.

              My HEAD IS HUNGRY !!
I'm still Pre-Op, my advice is to not wait but start battling it now when a slip up or bad choice won't hurt as bad.
The thing i found helped me the most was having someone point it out to me.
How could someone NOT know they are eating? It becomes a habit, second nature,and i was doing it (head hunger eating)alot more then I even realized.They say the first step to ending a habit is knowing why you do it, I think it is more being aware that it's being done.

If it isn't a scheduled meal or snack time ask yourself WHY am I eating this?
Bank overdrawn in the last couple days?Car needs fixed?The cat ate your favorite plant? then ask yourself if maybe your eating to choke down emotions you wern't allowed to have as a child? Feel like being angry and acting out?If your good all day you get "this". Feeling emotional and want to cry? Aunt so and so died who happened to be your favorite? Don't cry , tears won't bring her back here have cake instead. Feel realy excited cuz you had a great day? I'm busy right now , have some ice cream we will talk about it later.

Yes you can blame your elders for the food habits, OR, you can start to focus on healthier ways to deal with emotions and issues that still find you seeking food as a comfort.
Food is NOT your friend !! it is a sourse of fuel and energy to keep your vessle going. You wouldn't overfill your car with gas when it didn't need it would you? All that excess gas pouring out on the ground and being wasted makes just as much sence as all the excess fuel we take in having to go somewhere(hips,thighs, butt, belly,wherever you collect it) becouse we don't need it. The body works basicly the same as that, fuel in(food), fuel out(exersize).
Weather it be adult habitual influences as a child, Abuse as a child,Emotional stuffing as a child , the thing you have to keep reminding yourself is you are an adult now and you can make your own mind up, you don't need that way of helping and healing anymore, it's not realy doing either is it??

Hope you find your peace within.
Have you hugged your inner child today?






Getting records RE-Sent...
Today I went into the hospital records room ready for a huge fight becouse the surgary center told me that they still didn't have my test results and i have been doing tests from last nov.

The part that made my heart smile was this conversation...

Me: I need to know who to talk to in order to get my record forwarded to my Dr.
Her: let me see if they have been sent...Yes they were all sent
Me: well when I talked to his office yesterday the woman said she had no records
Her: his phone number?
Me: I don't know
Her: his address?
Me: I'm not sure at the moment
Her: Do you know his Fax number?
Me: No I don't sorry
Heras she looks almost as confused as me by now) Then how do you get ahold of them if you need them,And how am I suppost to send these records out(She had them pulled up and ready to send)
Me: I have it all at home
Herkind of snickering in a nice way) Then why didn't you bring it ?
ME: ( took a deep breath and looked at her) Well I don't do well with people or in public and I didn't think it would be this easy I realy thought I would have to come in here and fight with someone for an hour and not accomplish anything anyway...lol
Her: Ok Mrs T lets try it this way , I'll give you my name and # and you go home and call me with his fax # and I'll send it all out then.


You could tell this poor woman was trying hard to keep her composure and be professional,I probably seemed like one of her kids asking for something they didn't know they could have...lol

As I walked out of the room I could here her giggle but thats ok so was I..lol

I called her an hour later with the fax # and she ok i'll get those right out.

(She sent them the same day , I called and checked )






If your asking yourself "Should I do this" here is my thought on that...
When I was givin the recomendation of this surgary yrs ago I turned it down becouse i was just fat (Obese to the doctors) but i was healthy and active and my health was not (yet) in jepardy So I thought.

I even left my home town and moved to Missouri so that i could research this surgary one way or another without outside influance and presures.Even found a doctor i liked the looks of but he was too far from where I was at with no transportation so i figured it was a sign it wasn't time yet.

4 yrs later I have diabetis,high blood preasure,and a number of other problems,I'm now on 16 pills a day, and through having the pre op stress test they found a problem in the results and now I have to put the surgary on hold till I am cleared by a cartiologist who will be checking me out to either clear me or give me a heart catheterization.

Wanna hear the strange part? After i chose a doctor and decided to do this and got all the testing started the surgon from missouri relocated not only to erie but into the same office my surgon is in...lol

I can't tell you what to do , but knowing now what i do , I would have taken the opertunity when I had the chance.





4/25/05
 I'm not so much much the waiting type

  I now know the number of my pcp,the surgary center, the sleep center, my local hospital and hospital where the sleep studdy was done almost by heart..LOL


I feeling kind of discouraged today so I called the girl at my surgary center who handles the paperwork for applying to insurance and asked her how realistic is was for me to think I could actually have surgary done next month or if I am just fooling myself and should look twards a later month,
She told me I needed the letter from my pcp and the sleep study results and then she could submit , and yes it was realistic to think I could do surgary next month, I told her about my pcp holding off till i get the report back from the cartiologist, she said we didn't need that to submit and to let my pcp know that they can get aproval and then schedule acordingly.
Okay I got my sanity and a little glimmer of hope back.  

  Called my pcp's office and the nurse was busy and going to call me back(we have been playing phone tag since) After that I called the sleep study place and informed them i called the hospital where it was done and she said she didn't have the report back yet and told me that even if they got it back , if i had to do the second half it would take 3-4 months to schedule so not to plan on surgary till at least July or August,and she would call me. I told her I knew they have alot of patients to deal with so If they don't call by wednesday I will call back , she said no need we will call you....I'm calling her today.
  The friend I am planning on doing the buddy system with had the test the same night and she talked to the girl right after I did and her result were just comming in on Fax , she was told she had apnia and had to be scheduled for the second night, they scheduled her for that on june 11th. Wich means it will be the middle of August before they get those results back.

It sure is some roller coaster trip they have us on isn't it?





4/27/05
I had this dream last night...
In order to have surgary i needed to pass this written test with 100% well i got ALL the answers except there was one unfinished question and when i asked them what the rest of that question was they said If you don't know we arn't allowed to tell you but if you wait we will get back to you tomarrow or the next day, wait? I can't wait I have 10 min to finish this test,then they told me well you obviously don't know the answer so you fail the test, your surgary has been cancled, try again next year.





04/27/05
I went to see the cartiologist today with the outlook that as long as whatever they found was fixable I would not let myself lose hope.
 He was a very nice man, went over all my tests ,ekg's ,stress test , echocardiogram and said that he concludes that the shadow was just a shadow due to weight.He said after the surgary if i am still having issues to make another apt and come back to see him.He added in a very nice and polite way that i do have 300 extra pounds to cary around and yes that could very well in itself be causing the stress.
  We also talked alot about the WLS , The only time i felt on guard with him was when he looked at my mom and said to her "Why in the world did you let her get this size?" I told him that she had nothing to do with my weight and that a certain age kids begin to think parents know nothing at all and do as they please and that i was no different. I was responcible for getting this size and i am responcible for getting to a healthy size again and looking forward to this surgary becouse i will no longer need to eat what i do now to fill up and that as the weight goes i will be more able to move and burn the calories i do take in. He smiled and said that was the answer he was looking for and felt i was well educated and prepared to have this surgary and not waste my second chance.
 After the talking and going over the tests and all he said he would send my letter of release and recomendation to my PCP and my Surgon.

I also got a call from the sleep apnia office , i have mild apnia and will have to fitted with a c-pap before i am able to be cleared for surgary, My apt for that is June 19th but they have me on the list for the next available cancelation. I have to use it for 2 weeks and go back and get re evaluated again.





05/08/05
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY MOM !
Okay i'm going to try and post some pics of my Mom, hope this works...lol

My mom is my Hero !! you go girl!!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com This pic was taken about 20 yrs ago at around 400 lbs.

I have worked pretty hard the last few months helping her get out of the "fat girl" mindset , We went shoping for new cloths(took me 20 minutes to convince her to go from the 22/24 section over to the 16/18&18/20 section hehe, got her a new hairdo (no more bla hair )and took some pics so she could see it and let it finally sink in. (youhoo mom your not fat anymore !!)

Image hosted by Photobucket.com This pic was taken on 05/05/05 and she has now lost 200...No surgary, just 20 years of hard work.




05/28/05
Today is just one of those days....
Heres something I posted as a responce to someone asking how the frustration of waiting was handled.
Hope this also helps others reading and feeling frustrated....

My Conceltation with my surgon was in November,I'm still working on stuff for surgary to be done.
I am SOOOO frustrated by this process,lets just say it was a good thing I got my psych eval first,,,,lol

I am now on 6 new meds and waiting on an apt to go in and get the CPAP evaluation so they can report to the pulminologist and then I wait 3-4 weeks for them to decide my level of need and write a script for the machine,and then I have to have the machine for 2 weeks and then see the polminologist to get cleared before they can even submit to ins for aproval.

I had everything else done by the end of March , First of April and have to wait till June 19th for the dang sleep thing That plus the could be 6 week wait for the polminologist clearance would be the first week of August.
Then I have to wait for them to submit to insurance for aproval and see if i get denied or not. In the last 6 months I have been working on this the Ins has changed thier requirments 3 different times (a diet history to 6 months pcp evaluated diet to just 3 failed diets in the past wich of course they changed to just a week or so after I finished the 6 month diet thing,,,Grrr, so who knows what they will want by the time I get through the polminologist.

There are alot of hoops some have to jump through and others seem to apply and be aproved in no time other have waited years, but the one thing each of us has in common is we have made the decision to do this and we are hear to support each other before, during and after this surgary.

Keep up the hope and get a good hobby you'll need it....lol
Post here alot these are good people and a great suppost system.
Have I thought about giving up?Yep,Do I give up? Yep..Have I cancled any of my Apts? No , I know eventually I'll be done...Someday





6/18/05
The girl from the sleep center called today to conferm my apt for sunday night and i told her that depended on how fast they would get the results back becouse I'll be losing ins the first of July or at the latest first of August due to housold changes and there was no point in getting it even done if there wasn't going to be time to see the polmanologist afterwords, she said i thought you were doing this for that bypass surgary and i told her I was until they screwed around so long there would be no way that is even an option anymore by the time i would see the polm. and then I hung up ,she called back and said she would make a note to try reading it a.s.a.p. ,I told her good luck.






06/21/05
Okay let me say first due to what they are calling "Change in the dynamics of the household" I will be losing my Ins on or around the fisrt of August and Surgary is now out of the question it seems.(I was sooo close) Anyway....
I went for the cpap fitting, the girl said I slept about 6 hours, I told her I knew i would sleep becouse in the 48 hours b4 that I got about 2.5 hours of sleep(we have a cockatielchick that was born on the 11th and mommy pulls feathers so they have supervised visits every 2 hours so we have been taking turns with keeping watch), plus I always sleep when I don't feel well. I had a doctors apt with ,y pcp yesterday, turns out I have ear and sinus infection and my throat is raw and red.
I called the sleep apnea center when I got home yesterday and tried to explain to the girl that I would no longer be doing the surgary becouse of losing insurance the first of August and that if it took till the last week of July for them to even read the results I may not even have the script for the machine in time to get it and certainly not enough time to sleep with it 2 weeks and have the review with the Polmanologist do to the fact that thier timing would put that in the 3rd week of August.
She said that She would make a note about the insurance in my chart and see what she could do about having my chart be one of the first ones done so that i could get the machine and have it at least 2 weeks before the apt.and made me an apt for July 28th to see the polmonologist.I also told my friend whom I was going to do the budy system with that she would have to be doing the surgary alone and she said she is not doing it without me so they better just change that...lol
I told her unless she knew of some twist of fate I hadn't thought of then thats how it was going to happen.
I'm still in a bit of denile though,I thought last night that if I got to see the polm on 28th if they could just get aproval and surgary done in the next 48 hours (LOL) maybe just maybe it could happen.

I got depressed for awhile about it and stoped comming to the board was going to just leave it that way as to not waste anyones time since I wouldn't be doing the GB after all.
I got an e-mail from someone who noticed I wasn't on,So I got my but back in geer and got my but back on board, so now those guys are stuck with me...lol





Some pics of my birdkids.

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This is Beebs next to my car keys for size refrance.

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This Nelly 9 days old and still nakid..hehe

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This is Beebs, addicted to OH....lol

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This is Prince Charming,He is the daddy bird and got his name becouse the moment we brought him home and he saw Mocha he started singing "pretty bird"
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This is Mocha she is Prince's mate and the mother to Beebs and Nelly

Not a bird but one hot chick...hehehe


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This is my cousin the one that tells everyone I look just like her only I weigh a little more.





06/24/05
Well  went to spend some time with my friend who is going through the buddy system with and they called and told her that her surgary is scheduled for July 26th at 7 am.I honestly with her the best with her surgary and support her 1000% I'm just confused about the facts.
If we both had the same surgary center, same ins, same testing, then why is it I have to be cleared by the polmanologist and she doesn't?? They also told us as long as we were doing the buddy system we could be scheduled for surgary the same day back to back, then why is it she has her date already and they havent even sent in my paperwork??

I went to her house (no phone at home now) to call them and ask these questions and when they called back , they called back her to let her know surgary had been scheduled and when I called them back when she hung up the girl said oh the ins. person is gone for the day but you can call back monday.






 

From my highest weight,, that I know of.





  What do I tell my friend??

Maybe she does know she is eating that much and maybe she doesn't realise it at all, some people eat out habit like some smoke, before ya know it , it's gone and you don't remember it.

This surgary takes alot more commitment then just a 10 day diet as you know,And even though she may be willing to try that, it won't work for her,When it doesn't work,let her know that although she isn't a wls patient that your proud of her for trying and maybe find some healthy recipees for her to try. help her ween out the small evils that help her hide.

Also tell her how you excersize and things like that to get moving and that she can moderate them to her level of activity.

One of the things that upset me the most about good hearted "friends" is they were always talking about doing this or that and that i shouldn't or couldn't becouse i wasn't THAT size or i wasn't THAT in shape.

It changed for me one day when i was in a doctors office right after i became diabetic and she said  i needed to get active.After I snapped on her about the "THAT SIZE" theory. She explained to me about moderation theory.
So you can't lift 20 lb weights in each hand like your uncle does, you can lift a can of green beans to open them for dinner, use those for awhile.
So you can't run a 2 min mile, you can walk for 2 min so walk a min then turn around and walk back.
She also said add more each week.

Well I figured if I can do it and change my weight now that i was diabetic and on meds i was doing it "normal" just like the people That size, I ended up in the E.R twice becouse they thought i might be having heart issues,I had bloodwork done becouse I still wasn't feeling right and my pcp at the time sat down with me and said she was sending me to a diatition becouse i was malnutricioned, me a 480 woman, doesn't that happen to anorexic people weighing 80 lbs?

Turns out when we sat down and looked at my daily intake i wasn't getting near 1800 cal a day she wanted me to have.
For breakfast I would have 1 egg white 4 oz apple juice,lunch was 1/2 can tuna on letuce, and dinner was 1/2 chicken breast with 1/2 c green beans, any other time i would take lettuce and put it in a bowl and chop up celery in it, no dressing or fancy things just lettuce and celery. same diet every day , day after day becouse i knew it was good for me and easy to remember.

I also tore the tendon away from the bone in my ankle when i forced my body to get up one day and walk a mile, i would walk and take a break and walk and on the way back up the hill to my house just the second house from the corner my leg gave way on some black ice and that was it. Doesn't that happen to marathon runners after 26 miles, no it happens when your muscle becomes exauted from way more activity then it's used to athlete or not.
It was while I was healing from that when I had to use the moderation theory becouse i was off my foot 6 weeks.

If she isn't ready to start with moderations then she isn't ready or at least not informed about them , I never was and went from one extreem to another it was the week I lost 27 lbs that alerted the doctor something may be more wrong then she thought.

At the 480 lb stubborness I was when I became diabetic my life was pass or fail, at least my midset was, and there is NO WAY i would have even concidered this surgary then.
Now I eat fish chicken low fat beef sometimes veggies and fruits and carbs too and yes now and then i even splurge, and I can now walk a mile in 45 min,probably 30 if i push it. I lost and lost and started gaining again and as of this morning weigh 428, 1 lb less then at my surgary consalt.
I did it yes and I did it slowley at MY pace becouse i am not like everyone else i'm me.

Sorry this seemed to turn out like a bunch of babbling but maybe your friend just needs to know that you started way back here at one time and she has to take the same small steps you did at first, If she isn't ready to do that there is no way this surgary would help anyway as it 90%human and 10% tool.





07/01/05
I'm losing insurance on or around Aug 1st as some of you know.
I talked with the surgary center and I retook the PFT and will be having my pcp fax them to the surgary center and the polmanologist office.

When I took and failed the PFT the first time I had a lung infection and asthma reactions, whenever I took a normal breath I coughed till I puked, of course I failed it....lol

The Surgon is waiting for me to be cleared by the polmanologist, it isn't an insurance thing, so i'm hopeing if this was is passable he will submit for insurance at least even if i still have to see the polmanologist on the 11th of July, If not I have to see him first and get the release wich could take up to 48 at least to get the result and clearance.

They said they would do what they could to get me in for surgay in July (IF) everything goes alright.

The surgon won't be back till July 6th so I won't know anything till the 7th. I'll keep everyone updated.





07/12/05
POLMANOLOGIST APT.
I went to the polmanologist yesterday my apt was at 2:15, the girl tells me at 2 well you don't have a pcp referal and if you can't get one in 15 min we have to reschedule you,I said where is a phone...lol

I talked to the polmanologist and he said he saw no problems with my tests so he was going to write the clearance letter and it should be to surgons office within 48 hours , I beged him please please pleaseeeeeeee send it sooner, told him about ins. he said it wasn't him it was the trascriptionist.
The girl up there also said she could give me the script for my cpap but that the ins hadn't cleared it yet but when they did she would let me know.

I talked with girl at the window on my way out and she said she would try to see if she could get the fax to the surgon this morning, and that she would call ins and dbl check on the cpap clearance while she was at it.

I thanked her as cheerfully as I could and headed home , When I got home there was a msg on my machine, she called 2 min before I got home, my cpap has been aproved make an apt, and the fax was sent to surgons office they should have it by the time I get the message. I called the cpap place and I pic up my machine friday morning at 11 am, and then just out of curiosity I called the surgons office and asked if they recieved the fax yet, I talked to Jennifer and she said she got it , put it in my chart and is giving it to the nurse this morning and if all is ok they will send it to insurance today. When I call or she calls me later today I'm gonna see if they can get me in ASAP when it's aproved so I can have at least 1 check up before the ins ends.
 I'll let you know more when I find out.









07/21/05
I called Ins on the 19th and they said IF anything was submitted they never got it and to call and see if it can get it resubmited, I called the surgary center and She said they would call Ins and see what was going on. I missed when she called back so called her the morning of the 20th and she said they did get it , and I was aproved and the nurse would call with a date that night or the next morning.
Today she still hadn't called by 11:30 so I called her,She got the book out and set up my date for Aug 15 and then after we talked about all the details she said oh wait your BMI is over 70 you need a filter put in befor surgary we have to cancle that and get ahold of the cardiologest to see when they can put in the filter then we reschedule your date and get ahold of you.
So thats whats new with me this week.




7/30/05

I'm STILL suppost to be waiting on a date, It seems that it is impossabe for two offices side by side to corolate a cardiologist and a surgon, I have decided to just go ahead and pay bills and if I don't have the money for the trip for surgary oh well it must not be ment to be, I'm tired of being "on hold" for nothing to happen so i'm taking the money I set aside and getting the stuff I need for the car.

On a better note though, My friend Erica had her surgary the 26th, she did awsome and came home yesterday, Her weight at consult was 288 at check in it was 278 and when we left yesterday she was 273.4
thats 4.6 lbs off already , she hates her pics now but i'm sure eventually she will get past that and let me post them...lol






08/08/05
I got my date....
Aug 24th I go and do the pre op stuff.
Sept 6th I have to at the hospital at 6 am I'm first.
My birthay is the 4th so i guess I get a real good presant..hehe
She said enjoy your B-day cuz the 5th you start clear liquids.

!!! FINALLYYYYYYYY !!!

Am I nervous ? Not realy . it still feels kind of like one of those dreams your not sure you woke up from.




08/12/05
 My hubby wrote this , what a wonderful man he is...even if he did make me cry..lol

this isnt shelly t , but its her husband , shes been through so much to get where shes going. i am the proud husband of a good woman who knows what she wants, which is a better life for herself and i. i love you so much my love. i wont be behind you in this , i wont be in front of you in this , i will be right beside you trying to be the best man i can to you my love. i know this is a strange way of doing things for me, but iwant the world to know how much i love shelly t . shes a sexy woman now , and she will be sexy even after its all done. its just like how she says it " her inner self will now be brought out to her outer self " . this is for everyone to read , but more importantly this is for my dear wife who has made such a sacrifice for herself to do this . i love you my love. 4 ever 4 always. ... love rick




08/23/05
Weighed in a 408 this morning.
Hi again,
Well 2 weeks to go...I woke up ill the other day and now I have to go to PCP for clearance that what I have isn't serious and will be gone by  the 6th.
Am I nervous yet, nope. That could be though that I am not an emotional type, I deal better with facts and figures then I do with emotions.



About Me
Neer Lake Erie, PA
Location
35.8
BMI
RNY
Surgery
09/06/2005
Surgery Date
Sep 22, 2004
Member Since

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