SkinnySoon
I am 29 year old female living in Pennsylvania. I began struggling with my weight toward the end of high school, after joining the Army Reserves. As a side note, I joined to help pay for college. My Mom thinks that all of the stress that the military puts your body through, somehow messed up my system and that is why I have weight issues. However, if you look at my family, many of them tend to be overweight (not obese). Unfortunately, I seem to be the most overweight out of everyone in my family. I also have some medical issues (hormonal problems) that may contribute to my weight issues. But for the most part there are a few main reasons I am obese: I use food as medication and a reward, I never feel full, and not to mention I love food, particularly sweets.
In an attempt to control my weight, I have tried many diets and supplements. I have had limited success with many of them, but was never able to stick with them long term. I even managed to lose 30lbs with LA Weight Loss several years ago. Can you guess what happened….since I am always hungry…..I stopped following the plan and gained it all back plus some. About two years ago I joined Weight Watchers. To my amazement I was able to lose 60lbs. Again, can you guess what happened….I hit a plateau….maintained for awhile….felt deprived and as always….hungry…..so I slowly stopped counting points…..maintained for awhile longer…..then I gained a little here and there.…now I am back where I started.
With each attempt, I felt more and more defeated. I felt destined to be obese and unhealthy. Many people (thin people) can't understand why I can't stop myself. Sometimes I can't understand why I can't put the fork down either. Yes I do use food to cope with a bad day. I use food as a reward for a good day. I have struggled for years with the idea that food is for survival, not a form of entertainment, or a medication. I am continually working at this and am slowly improving. Unlike other addicts which can survive without their addiction; we can not survive without food. In addition, we would never subject an addict to their vise, we wouldn't say here have a little it is good. People who struggle with their weight are surrounded by food; events are often planned around what to eat. We will never be able to get away from our vise. We must just learn to deal with it.
After learning about the Lap-Band surgery, I almost immediately knew that it was for me. A minimally invasive, adjustable, and reversible (if necessary) procedure that would allow me to eat less yet still feel full. Finally, there is something out there that would allow me permanent freedom from being hungry all of the time. The Lap-Band would finally help to give me control over food. There is one problem with the band, if the band rules are not followed; I could physically harm myself (band slippage, esophagus dilation, etc). This may sound weird but this is exactly what I need to force me to follow the rules. The idea that I could potentially harm myself, if I don't work the band, is just the thing I need to keep myself from breaking the rules. After all, I would never intentionally do anything to cause harm to myself, so therefore why would I break or bend the band rules.
Since I am a scientist (I work at a pharmaceutical company testing vaccine stability, expiry, and potency), I always do a lot of research before making any decision. So I have been reading all the info I can get my hands on. I have looked up many articles online, checked out blogs, forums, and even bought two books. I am now addicted to this board. I am lurking on here almost everyday. I feel well informed and that I am making the best decision possible for me.
Now that I have made my decision you can see the progress of events in my blog:
