Spinal surgery update

Aug 11, 2013

Surgery was 7/31, discharged on 8/5.

I'm back in a happier zone weight wise, back into the 150s (158.5 or so). That was a LOT of water weight! LOL

Still in a world of pain, but I'm getting more mobile. I went to see my daughter's violin recital and she did amazing. I'm glad I made myself go and it was good for me to get all dressed up and be a somewhat normal mom, even if I had a walker, winced a lot and suffered through. If you will indulge this proud momma for a minute, go see her at http://youtu.be/0iDnNhZr0KY - I'm SO proud of her. She has a little stage fright and she did lose the music once, but she fought back to it. This was a hard piece for her level and she learned it in two months.

Unfortunately, we came to realize that I'm not going to be in any shape to be he left alone for any length of time so my sister is flying out here on Wednesday to help. I just can't do it myself. I'm sad about that but there's no real choice. She works for me so it makes it easy.

I'm holding it together. Eating like crap, but my husband is helping me rein in my frappe and milkshake addiction. I'm barely eating though. I'm trying. It's all I can do.

Right now, I regret it, but I know I couldn't live like I was before and this is temporary. This was a very major surgery and the recovery is just as major. I just keep telling myself that it's normal and I'll be okay. I say that a lot. LOL!

Anyway, no other update. I'm okay. My pain is around a 5 until the drugs wear off and then start hitting 8-9 territory. Thank goodness for the most amazing loving caring husband in the world. Honestly, I'm not sure I could handle what he is. In the past 25 months he's endured me recovering from WLS, neck fusion and now this. A lesser man would have run away screaming. I try to do things on my own and then I make it worse. He gets frustrated with me, understandably. I just hate being reliant on other people.

I had to have my 12 year old son help me to the bathroom this morning. How mortifying. BUT I was careful to keep bits covered and have him leave and come back and he said he was okay with it and knew I needed help. He's an angel. Both of my kids are. I've obviously done something right because they are totally taking care of me.

I still hurt like hell. Major hell. This is more than I signed on for, but it is what it is and all I can do is heal and look forward to having a relatively pain free life. I can't stop blaming myself because the weight was a big contributor to this problem, but... it is what it is. I'm working on that in therapy and in my own head.

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