snfrazier
All of my life I have been an overweight person. "I" didnt realize that I was overweight until 4th grade when I was isolated from a group of friends because of my weight. In my family everyone looked like me, talked like me & ate like me - so I had no clue that the world viewed me as overweight. In my world I was just like everyone else & the word "fat" was never used in my household. I didnt even know what the word "fat" meant until that day in 4th grade. Even in that instant I didnt pick up on what "fat" meant but I knew that it was an ugly word based off of the way they treated me.
After that day, I became very aware of my appearance. I never knew that my appearance was a problem but it affected my psyche to want to belong to people who "appeared" to be happy. That is when I started voicing to my Mom the need to lose weight.
I tried everything. From my Mom locking me outside of the house during the summer to force me to overcome my shyness & perform physical activity to L.A. Weight Loss program at the age of 14 to selecting extracurricular activities to vegetable plates, slimfast, jenny craig, weight watchers etc. Nothing seemed to work so I began to accept my weight & develop a confidence to mask what my pain was that started in 4th grade.
I kept telling myself that it didnt bother me that I was always the heaviest out of my friends. I kept reminding myself that beauty is within and not on the outside. I developed my confidence from my intellect & not my looks. I knew I was cute but I also knew that it would take a special kind of person to love all of the "extra" love that existed.
Once I found that love in my husband, my health started to decline. I began to have blinding headaches that I couldnt explain. I just thought they were migranes until I had a serious car accident that required me to have physical therapy for six months. (At least once a week.) After the 6th visit my doctor questioned whether or not I had high blood pressure because everytime they did my stats, my blood pressure was high. After some blood work & constant observation it was concluded that I had high blood pressure AND high cholesterol. In addition to my back problems, low energy levels & breathing problems.
That is when I made the decision that something had to happen. I joined 24 hour fitness & committed to working out. It caused me to lose some inches but it never stayed off. After the courage of one of my closest friends taking the plunge to have gastric bypass surgery I decided that is what I wanted to do to jumpstart my health in the right direction.
The more I talked about the desire to do WLS, the more I met other people who had did it. My friend Latonia received her surgery from Dr. Alexander & loved the results of this care. Then there was the insurance problem. I didnt have any insurance at the time when I gained the courage to make the decision to move forward. Now that my my husband has BC&BS coverage now makes a big difference in me proceeding forward since my Grandparents agreed to pay the difference of what the insurance wouldnt pay for. Thank God that they made that offer because of the fact that I dont have much money & am a full time college student.
January 16th of 2007 would be the first step into a new life for me. One that I have wanted since that horrible day in 4th grade. I cannot wait to tell the world my journey, good or bad.
