Melyssa S.

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It has been awhile since I posted anything. Today I finally reached another milestone! No longer in the 160's :) I can't believe how long the last 10 pounds took to come off. Size 10 in pants but still 12 for dresses. It is the holidays and all the baking begins in my house this weekend. I have not tried any sweets for over 6 months but I might be tempted to take a bite. Happy holidays to all. 

Wow 169.8! Since I am a slow loser it sure feels good to finally be in the 160's :)

I so want to be 145 for my sons wedding on 011213! However at the rate I am going I might not make it. I know I will get to my goal eventually though very very happy with my surgery. I want my oldest daughter to have WLS but her insurance wont cover it. I am hoping to go back to work and help her pay for it. Praying for something good to come my way so I can help her.

 

Well I had the MRI done today just have to wait for them to read and send the report to the Ortho. What will go wrong next:( 
At least my hands are ok and elbow so i can do a few things like type and knit :)
On a good note I am down to 176.6 today yay!! I have read so much about people reaching certain weights and then it stops going down and it really is a scary thought that I may not get to my goal weight. I still do not get hungry but my body gets weak when I need to eat. Tomorrow it will be 4 months since my surgery will have to take some pictures and post them. I don't see my doctor again untill Nov 1. This year is passing by real fast and I am getting concerned with the added health issues and insurance. I have met my 6400 deductable for this year but it starts all over again in Jan. So what ever is wrong with this shoulder has to get fixed before year end. 

 Happy birthday to me today :) Woke up with some really bad right shoulder pain going to try tylenol hope it helps. Well no birthday cake for me today and I really don't miss it, funny I don't even have a desire for it thank you RNY! Need to spend some time on going through medical bills and make a plan to get them paid over time :( not enough money in the HSA to pay them off all at once. This afternoon another ultra sound on my thyroid. Getting frustrated with doing this every 6 months wish they would take it out or wait longer inbetween the ultra sounds. 
Today is a raining day the kind of day you just want to stay in bed. Four more days and I will be 4 months out and new pictures will be added. 

Personal goal not met :( I was hoping to weigh in today on my BD 175 but the scale is not budging 179 for the past few days. 

It has been awhile since I posted anything in my blog. Today a scale victory! I am out of the 180's and weighed in at 179.6 yay!! I am still losing at a slower pace just like the doctor said i would. 2 pounds a week but as long as I am losing I am happy. I had set a goal for myself to weigh in on my birthday at 175 but don't think that will happen as it is only 3 days away. When I made that goal I really thought it was doable. Another weightloss goal is to weigh in at 145 for the wedding of my son Ryan and Amanda Jan 12th. I wonder if I will fall short on that one also :( I guess my calculations are off a bit. It is strange because I think alot about what I will weigh and what size I will be at different times in this journey alot daily I should say.
 
On another note: I need motivation and I don't have any. I would rather sit and do nothing what's up with that? Still sore from my workout Wednesday - my plan was to go to the gym today but I didn't go shame on me. I have that Scarlet O'Hara thing going on all the time "tomorrows another day"! 

Well my visit went well with the doc today. Weighed in at 184 they said I am a ahead of scheduled weight loss I can add a few things back in. Like oatmeal or whole wheat bread once or twice a week. I can also have nuts. But I have chosen not to include the carbs back in yet. I am going to wait till after my next visit in 6 weeks. I will add the nuts back in since it is something that is portable and easy to have when I am traveling. I say this now but I may change my mind. I don't want to slow my weight loss down and adding new things might do that. With my height being 5'6" my doctors goal weight for me is anywhere from 134 to 166. My personal weight loss goal is 140. 

On another note: I stopped at Marshalls to pick up a couple shirts for my trip to Vegas tomorrow and was so excited to fit into size Large no more XXL very happy to say the least. 

I think when I return from the trip to Vegas I will make an appointment to see the Pshycologist. I am very troubled in my mind about still being a giant even though the size cloths I am wearing are smaller. 

Well as of today I am down to 184.4  Which means I am just under half way to my goal weight of 140. Yay!!! Well I have not posted a blog for over a week. Since my last blog - our his and hers chairs were delivered and they delivered one right chair and one wrong . So I had to call and complain and reschedule delivery of the correct chair swap out. Yesterday the correct chair was delivered and I am a happy camper. 

Last week we flew to Chicago for my husbands work. We stayed at the Hard Rock nice hotel for Chicago. So hear goes one of my goals was to feel comfortable in an airline seat! While I was MUCH more comfortable the whole time on my way home I had a middle seat and next to me was a young lady who maybe weighed 100# which made me feel like a beached whale. 
I am down 63# from my highest weight and of course it made a difference but still I felt FAT! Needless to say I think I have not completed that goal.

On Friday we are headed for Las Vegas for a week and another flight. Other than the flight I am looking forward to spending some time with good friends, doing some gambling, and getting some sun and pool time. I need to get out today and pick up some cheap shorts and tops for the trip as they say the weather is in the 90's. More pics to come from Las Vegas. 

Tomorrow is my next check up with Dr. Perez 

 

Wow today we are getting our recliners delivered (his and hers)  We are replacing our couch that has two electric recliners in it. Who would have thought it would be so difficult to give away a leather couch that is only 3 yrs old. Salvation army says they will pick up on Monday however that can't have hair on it. I said it is leather it can be wiped down. They said that is fine just make sure it doesn't have any hair on it. I am not sure I can do that. It could have some down in the sides or back maybe underneath. I have dogs! Oh well I may give freecycle.org a try someone may want a nice couch without the hassel. 

Today I weighed in at 189.1 why couldn't it just say 188.9 I think that would have made me happier. I have reached one of my goals and that is to weigh less than my husband YAY for me!!!! Next Wednesday we fly to Chicago and I am hoping that the airline seat is more comfortable than when I was 230. It has to be better, but airline seats in general are not comfy. 

Found a great protien that so far is not giving me trouble "Old Wisconsin" turkey sausage bites. Love them and 1 ounce 6 pc is 8 grams of protein. 

All right delivery men pls hurry and bring my chairs so I can get on with my life.

Well I have not posted anything in a few days so I think it is time I unload my thoughts. I have just gone for 5 days without losing a  pound! I know this is not considered a stall but it sure as heck drove me crazy. The math just doesn't seem to add up anymore since RNY. You know calories in calories (burned) out. The number of calories it takes to make or lose a pound. It must be different to us RNY'ers. 

So I have taken up the craft of knitting on looms to keep myself occupied and am enjoying it very much. I think alot of family and friends will be getting scarfs this year haha. 

 Message Poet Kelly left today - had to have it to look back upon


This is from a book by Og Mandino, called The Greatest Miracle in the World.

Take counsel.

I hear your cry.

It passes through the darkness, filters through the clouds, mingles with starlight, and finds its way to my heart on the path of a sunbeam.

I have anguished over the cry of a hare choked in the noose of a snare, a sparrow tumbled from the nest of its mother, a child thrashing helplessly in a pond, and a son shedding his blood on a cross.

Know that I hear you, also. Be at peace. Be calm.

I bring thee relief for your sorrow for I know its cause ... and its cure.

You weep for all your childhood dreams that have vanished with the years.

You weep for all your self-esteem that has been corrupted by failure.

You weep for all your potential that has been bartered for security.

You weep for all your talent that has been wasted through misuse.

You look upon yourself with disgrace and you turn in terror from the image you see in the pool. Who is this mockery of humanity staring back at you with bloodless eyes of shame?

Where is the grace of your manner, the beauty of your figure, the quickness of your movement, the clarity of your mind, the brilliance of your tongue? Who stole your goods? Is the thief's identity known to you, as it is to me?

Once you placed your head in a pillow of grass in your father's field and looked up at a cathedral of clouds and knew that all the gold of Babylon would be yours in time.

Once you read from many books and wrote on many tablets, convinced beyond any doubt that all the wisdom of Solomon would be equaled and surpassed by you.

And the seasons would flow into years until lo, you would reign supreme in your own garden of Eden.

Dost thou remember who implanted those plans and dreams and seeds of hope within you?

You cannot.

You have no memory of that moment when first you emerged from your mother's womb and I placed my hand on your soft brow. And the secret I whispered in your small ear when I bestowed my blessings upon you?

Remember our secret?

You cannot.

The passing years have destroyed your recollection, for they have filled your mind with fear and doubt and anxiety and remorse and hate and there is no room for joyful memories where these beasts habitate.

Weep no more. I am with you ... and this moment is the dividing line of your life. All that has gone before is like unto no more than that time you slept within your mother's womb. What is past is dead. Let the dead bury the dead.

This day you return from the living dead.

This day, like unto Elijah with the widow's son, I stretch myself upon thee three times and you live again.

This day, like unto Elisha with the Shunammite's son, I put my mouth upon your mouth and my eyes upon your eyes and my hands upon your hands and your flesh is warm again.

This day, like unto Jesus at the tomb of Lazarus, I command you to come forth and you will walk from your cave of doom to begin a new life.

This is your birthday. This is your new date of birth. Your first life, like unto a play of the theatre, was only a rehearsal. This time the curtain is up. This time the world watches and waits to applaud. This time you will not fail.

Light your candles. Share your cake. Pour the wine. You have been reborn.

Like a butterfly from its chrysalis you will fly ... fly as high as you wish, and neither the wasps nor dragonflies nor mantids of mankind shall obstruct your mission or your search for the true riches of life.

Feel my hand upon thy head.

Attend to my wisdom.

Let me share with you, again, the secret you heard at your birth and forgot.

You are my greatest miracle.

You are the greatest miracle in the world.