Stephanie S.
Hello Everyone,
I think I'll start with the positives.... I'm a relatively healthy 40 year old with a wonderful family and a great career. My husband Steve and I have been married for 15 years, together for 21 years. We have a daughter, Emily, who is 6 years old and a dog, Latte, who's 8 and thinks she's Emily's older sister! I'm a nurse in a cardiac critical care unit .
Now for....the rest of the story! I have been heavy since I was a child. I never met my biological father, but my mom said that his mother and sisters were all morbidly obese. I do think the propensity for obesity is genetic, although that's certainly no excuse for allowing one's self to get to my current weight! The first time I really felt "fat" was age 9 when I started at a new school. My last name was Boling, and I had buck teeth and was pudgy. So, guess what the other kids called me.....Buck Tooth Boling Ball! It's kind of funny now, but it illustrates the BS I lived through as a kid. At 10, my mother was concerned enough to get me up early in the am to jog a few miles with her. Even today I HATE jogging. She tried everything she could to help me, but those things just made me feel different and a failure compared to my siblings. My Mom was great but she didn't have great taste in men. Both of my stepfathers were abusive pieces of @$#%#$^$^$#%^. If I had seconds at dinner, I was called a pig. If I didn't have seconds, it was "Wow, Steph's not eating more, that's a first!" There were a lot of forced runs (both step-dads were military men) and diet plans as well. My second step-father decided at the last minute that he would not contribute any money toward my college because I hadn't lost enough weight to please him during the summer. Since he had promised me $4,000 per year, that was a real blow. Cruel, huh? Now my mom is married to a nice man who is very caring and supportive to me and my siblings. Although I don't call him dad, he's the closest thing I've ever had to a father who cares about me.
Although my weight steadily climbed during high school, I managed to have a fairly normal social life with a few serious boyfriends and a great group of friends. People wouldn't have guessed, but my self-confidence was pretty fragile. I remember my mother saying once, "Stephie, you have such a great personality and pretty face that you will have boyfriends and a husband someday, but if you would lose weight, you would have so many more choices" So, I tried, many.....many times...and failed. For example, I started working out in the gym and playing intramural touch football my freshman year of college. Instead of gaining the "freshman 15", I gained the FRESHMAN 60! WHATEVER!
I met a great guy my first day of college and we have been together ever since. Somehow, I managed to find a man who loves me no matter what. When I say, "I look horrible, don't touch me," he says "you look beautiful, now let me give you a hug." He's always been scared of me having WLS, so I invited him to an informational seminar at my hospital. My husband is still a little scared for me, but he's very supportive. I hurt my knee recently and haven't been able to drive or work for the past month. Steve has been leaving work to take me to all my classes and appointments so that I don't mess up my surgery plan.
It looks like my RnY will probably take place in September. I can't wait! It's very difficult to exercise at my current weight and my knee pain makes it hard for me to enjoy my work. I feel sick and miserable much of the time. I can't wait to run around better with Emily, go to concerts and other amusements without worrying about how I can stand to be squished into the seats for two hours, and meet the parents of Emily's school mates without being embarrassed by how I look. I also can't wait to have more energy to devote to my home and especially my husband. I thank God for helping me take this step to regain my health and life.
