sundaymorning
I'm really good at complaining...
Nov 23, 2010
I posted last week saying I finally got my date (Dec. 15) and that it was hard for me to get excited because i had/have so much going on in my life at once.
I still have a lot going on but while i'm trying to prepare myself, I'm all of a sudden getting scared. I dont know if it's because of the chain of unfortunate events i've been experiencing or if for once i'm REALLY thinking about it.
I was originally more afraid of the needle going into my arm for the IV than anything else but now i'm REALLY afraid of going under (I think it's the control factor)
Also, I feel like i'm all of a sudden completely unprepared. I have wanted this for 3 YEARS! I have gotten dates before and had to get them canceled because of some mistake or what not.
What should I have for clear liquids?
Can I really live without food or am I allowing to take over my life?
How will I ever find the protein drink I like before surgery?
I think my major fear is that I am an emotional eater. Since right now i'm going through a rough patch, I am able to eat my feelings away.
I had to move back in with my parents this last week and I'm afraid my mom will not know how to handle the new changes in my life. She is already freaking out which doesn't help me out at all.
Anyways.. this is really just a rant.
