Tammy F.

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Well, I have been doing the 5 day pouch test. I have done great on it and so far have lost 4 pounds. Hoping that is the motivation I need to get back to my goal weight of 130....

I definitely have been away too long. I actually needed some inspiration and found myself back here. Since my last post my life has been an emotional roller coaster and I believe, in part, because of that I have gained 40 pounds. I am desperate to get back to 130 and felt this was the best place for me to seek motivation, as it has always helped in the past.

I had worked for our local newspaper and was fired due to what I saw as a personality conflict with the new Publisher. For a short period of time I worked in another town doing the layout of a (shopper style) paper. I then decided to begin a new journey in life by starting my own newspaper. It was the first time I felt I was actually doing something for me. I knew it was going to be a great deal of work and many sacrifices but I was willing to do it. When I first discussed with my husband and my family they agreed I should do it as well. About three months into my journey my husband began to voice concerns about the fact my new journey was not making a profit. My journey caused much chaos and unhappiness in our home. Against the wishes of my daughter, the one person who seems to support me no matter what, I gave up the newspaper after a little more than one year in business. So, in July 2010 I found myself searching for MY TRUE SELF, once again.

In October 2010 I became a 911 dispatcher and found another job I love dearly. However, to this day I still catch myself asking "What if?" Writing was a therapy for me and I haven't done much of it since I have given up my newspaper. I find myself dreaming often of writing a book. I even have several ideas, but I can't find the motivation. I don't know if I fear success or if I fear something causing issues within my household or if I just fear that I may actually find the REAL ME.

WOW!!!! I cannot beleive I have been away so long. Today is the fifth year anniversary of my gastric bypass and I am happy to say I am maintaining a healthy weight. I stay between 130 and 160 and feel so much better than I did pre-op.
So much has happened to me over the past few years, not all of it good but a part of my journey nonetheless.

OMG---It has been so long since I have posted. Well my job had been keeping me busy but I was FIRED last Thursday because my new boss (of 4 1/2 months) couldn't work with me. This is the reason she gave but there was more to it than that. She didn't want to work with me because I don't have a Journalism Degree and she was upset from day one that I was Managing Editor of the newspaper and I knew exactly what I was doing without a DEGREE. Since I was fired I have been going through so many emotions. I was hired as a news reporter on Aug. 9, 2006 and have been with that company since. My co-workers watched me lose the weight and blossom into the person I had become. Yes, I say the person I had become because in the past few days I have been catching myself slipping into the old way of thinking. That job seemed to give me an identity. Yes, I know how silly that may sound to some but when I became known for my job I was my own person, not just someone's mother and someone's wife. I WAS ME..... Now I feel that has been pulled right out from under my feet. I keep finding myself wondering what is my true purpose in life. You see, this boss told me that I am NOT a journalist and that I CANNOT get along with people. These things have been cutting me to the soul and I am so MAD at myself for letting her get to me like that. A friend of mine sent me an email titled who I am makes a difference just a few weeks ago and I have to keep reminding myself of it. A kind letter to the editor on my behalf ran today and that tends to make me feel a little better. Here it is: Dear Editor: We would like to extend our thanks to Tammy for her thoughtful, thorough and fair coverage of Richmond Fire Department events, community education and outreach, and coverage of fires and emergencies during her time at The Daily News. Tammy was a consummate professional in all matters regarding our department. She was always available and responded at all hours to many emergency scenes, which allowed her to have a real feel for what takes place on the ground at an emergency. In addition, Tammy was eager to get information to the public with regard to safety and fire prevention. We wish Tammy luck in her future endeavors, and hope that she will continue to be involved in the community, though her work takes her away from the newspaper. Chief Lonnie Quick Richmond Fire Department

I did something Friday that I would have never had the confidence to do prior to WLS surgery. I drove a four cylinder race car on our local dirt track. I had SO MUCH FUN! It was the funnest thing that I have ever done and like I said, I know I wouldn't have had the confidence to try it before losing 146 pounds. I finished 7 out of 12 cars and didn't hit even one person. I didn't spin out or lose control of the car either. But I did feel myself sliding into those corners. My jaws hurt so bad from smiling so much after the race. Now if I can just get the hubby to buy me a car!!!! Will post pictures of my racing adventure later.

Today is a day that we as Americans remember as a very unnerving today. But I won't let that get me down. Today is another anniversary for me as well. I am 16 months post-op today. I have been doing things in my life that I never dreamed I would do. Tomorrow I will be taking some practice laps in a four-cylinder race car on our local dirt track. On Friday I will race on that same track. This is a major thing for me because pre-op I would have never done it. I will post some photos after my exciting adventure. Just hope I don't get hooked. We already have one racer in the family (our soon to be 8-year-old son). It will be way too expensive to have another. This surgery has given me a new chance at life and I thank God everyday for it.

I weighed today and I am finally 1 pound below my goal. I have been waiting for some time to reach my goal and I have surpassed it by one pound.

Weighed in at 132 today. Only two pounds till I reach my personal goal. Hoping to achieve that by the end of the week. As busy as I am at work, that should be possible. My boss fired a lady yesterday and when he was talking to me, he handed me some new business cards, they read "Managing Editor" as my title.(My last ones just have me as 'News Reporter.') I just about fell from the chair. He told me they were a little premature, as I have not officially been given the title until he sees I can handle it. Long story, the last lady didn't stick to the agreement that was made between them and he had already given her the title and the money to go with it. So he is being cautious.

I am normal!! My weight that is. I weigh 135 today!!! I finally weighed in at a normal weight for my height. I am no longer morbidly obese, obese, or even overweight. WOOHOOO Thank you God for allowing me to have this surgery and use it to change my life!!!!! Only five pounds to go to reach my personal goal!!!!

Today I received a pair of Rocky Mountain jeans in the mail that I got from Ebay. I held them up and said outloud, "Those aren't going to fit me." I tried them on anyway just to see how small they would be. Guess what? They fit!!!! They are a size 9. I am so happy to be wearing single digits. Can't wait to reach my goal weight. Only 7 pounds to go, if those last 7 pounds will ever budge.