the times come past

Apr 07, 2010

I recently found myself going through some old boxes of things from my school days and putting things in order. while doing this my oldest(12) came to me and asked me if she too would be a fat girl? well she is a bigger girl but i explained to her that she has her dads height and my weight so she might even out or she may be a bigger girl but tis ok as long as we both watch what sheeats and we both exercise together then we might be able to get things straight for her. then she helped me finish putting things in book and went out to play squirt guns. later that night as i got ready for bed i talked to my hubby and told him about my daughter and he agreed that with me doing the surgery she has a better chance at being healthy.
getting ready for my house inspection this week i started putting up pictures and found that there was none of me except for the one family picture we have. i was ahamed of myself because i know that i avoid the pictures at all cost and now that i have done this my kids wont have many pics of me while they grew up. does this make me want to have a camera and take pics NO!! but it does remind me that im still a mom and that while im fat im making a healthy attempt to make my life and the life of my kids better. so as i have only a few weeks left before the surgery im packing my bags and getting things in order and praying all the while that im making the right choice.

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