thekingskid

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 Just dropping in to say Hi and Happy SPRING!!! Ahhh it is so nice to sleep with the windows open, enjoy the fresh air, hear the birds singing, feel the sunshine on my skin! It was a LONG winter... I planted some flowers, I just love to sit on my back porch and just look at them and ponder over the changes in my LIFE in such a short time... On June 2nd It will be 18 months for me since I have had my RNY surgery! WOW!!!   <--- That is how I feel! Going from 427 Pounds to 233 Pounds! That in it's self is AMAZING in 18 months time! Almost unbelievable in my own mind. People tell me all time time how "amazing" I look!  I don't even know what to do with that comment!   That saddens me... Really it does. From a health stand point I am in a better condition! But mentally I still have issues with my body image, with food, with people... Here are some things "I" have noticed... People who have NOT had weight loss surgery are NOT going to understand what losing almost 200 pounds in a 1 1/2 years time will and can do to your body in so many ways emotionally, mentally, and physically! We also have to also add in our own daily lives to the mix... Being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, Christian, employee, etc... It doesn't just stop with we had weight loss surgery, we have lost weight what's the big deal... Isn't that what we wanted in the first place? This is SO much deeper! People in public actually speak to me now, they actually "see" ME as part of the human race! That saddens me! The other thing the bothers ME is that certain family members and certain friends even act different towards me now as well! Some act as if I didn't even accomplish anything at all... And some make it worse by even opening their mouth about it! It ALL boils down to how "I" react to it!!! How I choose to let it affect ME! I am posting this because I know there will be ALOT of people who will read this and be nodding their heads up and down!   But NO MORE!  We do not have to "allow" ourselves to feel that way! We are people; we deserve to be treated well! To receive compliments take them, say thank you and later soak in that compliment... It is so uncomfortable to us because for SO long we heard the opposite! When I am noticed in public now I softly say a prayer  that the person who just noticed me and did something kind for me will also do it for someone "Obese" Because "I" am still the same person that was discriminated against for “years” but not anymore why? Just because I am "smaller"  That is wrong and unfair!… Well enough rambling I just haven’t blogged for a while… I’ve been kinda in the dumps… My relationship with my mom has been non-existent… But ever since I was a teenager we have gone through this on again off again relationship so it’s on a “off-again” right now and has been for 5 months… We are both adults now and if not having a relationship is “healthier” for both of us then that is how it will have to be. Pretty “sad” though!  Because it doesn’t only hurt just her and I, I have children who now do not have any contact with their grandma who lives 2 towns away!!!  As for the husband, we are “hanging in there”!!! Praise GOD! Is all I can say!

Weight Loss Support Group is my lifeline; my heart beat since surgery!  I’d be so lost with out them!

“On Christ the solid ROCK I stand all other ground is sinking sand!” It’s rough in some areas but without The LORD I can NOT do or get through ANYTHING!!! And one more thing before I go for today!!! No matter how bad it looks or seems to be, SPEAK LIFE over it!!! Try to BE as positive as you can about it, speak positive about it, and talk to people who are positive and who are going to LIFT you up and ENCOURAGE YOU!!!   Jenn

Jeremiah 29:11 (New International Version) ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.