Got Lost!!! but found my way back!!!

Apr 26, 2012

Well last time I wrote i was so close to Inner Thigh skin removal.. IT didn't happen why? because the insurance said since i lost 40lbs in 3 mos i was not at a stable wieght so denied me on surg day yes that is right got sent home from surg because no one did thier job and read the denial before hand i was prepped and ready to go. I went into a deep depression feeling useless among other things. I could not belive this happened I came so far and this..so i have had to maintain a steady wieght for 6mos before they will reconsider well i am gonna try again end of june and hope for the best. winter was hell with my fibro  with constant weather changes it made it difficult to maintain my exercise and well  i am afraid i gained about 15lbs... great huh?  not really i have been very upset with myself over it and getting back to the basics all over again.

The thing one most relize in this journey is it don't end day of surg.. it continues for life. Life is never the same again and anyone who thinks it will be is wrong dead wrong. eating habits,exercise habits fluid intake,health is never the same you have to be ready for ups and downs and roadblocks that are thrown in your path.  I have been stopped in my tracks many times had to regroup and change my thoughts and plans. When I thought I made a mistake having this surgery My fiancee showed me a pic of when i was almost 500 lbs and i cryed. To this day it gets hard,my health has declined due to malasorbation and my fibro which is not controlled due to malasorbation. Even though i live in constant pain and need to give myself b12 shots monthly, and twice a year get iron by iv for 5weeks once a week . it was all worth the crap i have to do, i can fit in a booth at a resturant,buckle my seatbelt, sit in the tub,ride my horse, ride a bike,walk w my kids and dogs around the creek all without dying 10 steps out. eating out when that happens lets me have leftovers for 3meals, feeding my family has been a challenge cause they really don't like my healthy foods but are learning to at least try it..

I HAVE chosen not to gain by wieght back and 15lbs is a setback ,but it can be fixed. NEVER forget where your journey started and remember it only ends when YOU FAIL YOURSELF!! SURGERY DON'T MAKE THE NEW YOU !!!! YOU DO ITS YOUR CHOICE TO MAKE IT WORK OR LET IT FAIL ITS UP TO YOU!!!  the scale may not always be your best friend, look at it as your guide and not as a punishment. BELIVE IN YOURSELF AND NEVER GIVE UP YOUR DREAM!!!! this JOURNEY is a tough and trying one. never forget the support you have here on the site and those who love you. we all are on the same journey together we can do it!!!!!

0 Comments

About Me
sioux city, IA
Location
46.0
BMI
RNY
Surgery
11/30/2009
Surgery Date
Oct 24, 2009
Member Since

Friends 8

Latest Blog 13

×