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planning the wedding. Who knew it would be this much work! Anyway I'm still maintaining my weight around 135. I did recently start going to a new gym. I love it, and I've been able to run longer than I ever have, and I love lifting weights. I bought a wedding dress already even though my wedding is a year away. I did have a fleeting little thought about being able to maintain my weight for another year, but I've been doing well and hopefully the wedding will continue to be a good motivator.

Oh if you're interested in my wedding plans.. click on my bio to check my knot profile.....
                                   my bio

Wow I can't believe it has been this long since I last updated! I have been at my goal weight since christmas and I'm very happy about that, unfortunately I have been slacking off when it comes to the gym.  I was really stuggling with my depression for a few weeks, actually since before christmas, but now I think I'm good to go, except I hurt my back shoveling snow/ice last week and didn't think it was a good idea to go to the gym. But I'm going to go at least walk on the treadmill this week, I have to get moving! I have been very busy planning the wedding, I am amazed at all the decisions that need to be made! So far we have set a date and only have a DJ booked but we have decided on a venue and hopefully I'll be reserving that this week! Oh, our wedding date is June 14, 2008. And yes, I am planning already. Our DJ was already booked for two of the weekends in June, so I'm not really crazy. I am so grateful that I had WLS so now I can choose any wedding gown I'd like and not be limited to the small selection of plus size gowns.

We spent Christams Eve day and his parents house, just relaxing, watching football and eating good food. When we got home,  I got ready for bed and was waiting for Rick to come to bed. When he did, he reminded me to go downstairs to brush my teeth. So I did. When I got back into bed, he said something was funny with his pillow and that our pillows must have gotten switched when we made the bed earlier in the day. I didn't think the pillows were switched but if wanted to trade pillows, fine. When I lifted my pillow to give it to him there was a pretty little giftwrapped box under there.
I was very surprised! I opened the little box to find my beautiful engagement ring and I started to cry. I said "Well, are you gonna ask?" and he said "Would you be Mrs. Richard P. Zercher, Jr.?" Of course i said yes!

This is me before and after....or as close as I could create using virtual model! What a difference!

I had a wow moment the other day, I was babysitting my little cousin, she's 2, of course she can't stay in the toddler area at the playground at McDonalds. So shes's trying to get up to the slide in the bigger kids area, and is too little to reach to the next platform. Granted there was no one else there, but at first I just told her I was too big to go in the plaything. After her insistence I actually climbed in the thing..I don't know what the proper name is I guess jungle gym....anyway I was actually able to climb the whole way up to the slide with her. I couldn't have probably fit in the slide too but hate the static in those tube slides!  Anyway I though it was pretty cool that I could keep up with a two year old on the playground.

I am in such a funk right now! I don't know what it is. I'm grouchy and tired and just want to curl up in bed. I am not happy with my dad and can't muster the courage to tell him. I have been carrying that around with me for three weeks. I was also on vacation last week at this time and wish I was still there. Ugh I ust don't want to do anything. I am makig myself go out to dinner with my mom and I even tried dressing up a little, but I sill feel crappy today.

I was reading about the Oprah show that discussed addiction transfer in WLS patients and it was interesting. How does anyone know that these problems wouldn't have come up whether or not the person had WLS? I get a similar attitude anytime I don't feel well. People automatically think it has something to do with my surgery. Well guess what it was just a stomach bug, or an ovarian cyst and they don't have anything to do with my gastric bypass, so back off! I'm tired of people thinking that everything is a result of having surgery. It is as if people are looking for you to fail. Its so ironic that people say that Al Roker and Carnie WIlson gained their weight back. Maybe we should go and look up some pictures but they are both certainly slimmer than they were before they had surgery! It is as if any gain at all makes you a failure. I am tired of people's ignorance. Hopefully someday more people will understand this procedure and they won't be waiting for us to fall. Maybe it is just my grouchy mood but I needed to get that out! Thanks!

I went to  a Halloween party last weekend. It was hosted by one of Rick's work friends. I invited two of my friends and besides them and Rick I didn't know anyone!  After we were there for a little while, I heard that some of Ricks friends made a comment about Rick; implying that he must be good in bed since I'm with him. Ok so they didn't say it like that, but I don't want to offend anyone by typing what they really said. Anyway it was funny and I was definately flattered, although RIck is one hot hunk and everyone should be jealous of me for snagging him!

While my surgery was in September that was just the first of several milestones that are happening right now.  Right now I'm looking at my 25th birthday on Friday....not sure how I feel about that. This past weekend marked a year from when I moved into my apartment with my boyfriend. The anniversary of when we went on our first date is Nov 1( three years ago) and thats just two weeks away, and a few days after that we'll be travelling to Pittsburgh to see our Steelers play for the first time. Plus Halloween is always a  big deal and our whole apartment is decorated, and I am hoping we'll be getting engaged sometime soon...

WLS wise, I have met my first goal, I've made it into the century club and I'm getting closer to my ultimate goal...I am currently wearing a size 8 in pants and actually bought two shirts in size small last week! I can't believe it. I would really like to reach 135 and the scale has been teetering between 141 and 139 so I am getting closer! Right now I'm struggling to see myself. Everyone tells me that I'm smaller than my mom, who to me is small. I just can't believe that I'm smaller than she is. When I'm with a group of "normal" sized people, I still think people are wondering what that big girl is doing with all those pretty small people. But I do realize its amazing that I am actually smaller than I was in high school and my prom and graduation dresses are too big for me, and to say that on the verge of turning 25 is pretty cool.

I am also anxious about seeing a college friend that I haven't seen for a few years. She is a bigger girl, and when we were in college I was smaller than she was, but for some reason I'm afraid that she'll just see me as some skinny girl. And we all know that deep down when you are big, skinny people are bad....she never saw me at my biggest so this won't be a huge difference from what she remembers, but then again what do I know, I still think I'm a big person. Sometimes I wonder if my brain will ever catch up to my body size.....

Yay! I really like this new profile and it was pretty easy to transfer over my old one. Check out all my pics...there are alot - I'm almost out of room already! Now I just have to find some friends!!