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It's been just about a month since my last update and I'm feeling fabulous!! This Tuesday marks my 3 month surgiversary. I promise to post before/after pics on Tuesday!! So these past few months I have been talking about how anxious I have been about our trip to Florida this month. The last time I was on a plane, I barely fit in the seat, had bruises on my hips from having to keep the arm rests down & prevent me from *Gasp!* touching the stranger next to me, & my damned seat belt decided to shrink & not click close! Asking for a seat belt extender was the most embarrassing thing I have ever had to do & I vowed to never be forced to do it again! Two weeks ago I boarded that plane to Tampa with knots in my stomach. I knew I was smaller but I had an atrocious fear that my ass was still to big. When I sat down & pulled the seat belt around me I had the BEST realization that not only was the belt going to click close without me wrestling it like one of those swamp people wrestling an alligator, but I had extra room to pull the strap tighter!!! It was completely unreal! I looked at my husband and said "Hell yes bitches!" (bitches is my fav word besides the f bomb) I don't think my smile could have been any bigger. I did it!! Thank you RNY & Dr. Taylor! This past weekend was my 33rd birthday. I bought a size 22 Jeans because I wanted to look nice for Florida & my birthday. They are so big on me already that I can pull them down to my knees without unbuttoning them! haha Who would have thunk?! My Birthday goal was to see the 240's. I totally killed it & now I am well on my way to the 230's now! I am currently 48lbs lighter than the day of surgery & I hope by Tuesdays 3rd month anniversary I will be down an even 50lbs!

I have never realized exactly how much food is put in front of people at Christmas time. I swear there was more food than at Thanksgiving! I suppose it doesn't help that I also have to celebrate two of my Children's birthdays the same week as Christmas. (Dec. 21st & Dec. 24th) Yes, I know...my husband & I planned that well, huh?! Cookies & cakes, pies & breads...we haven't even talked about dinner yet! I made the decision to not tell my husbands family about my RNY surgery. I really didn't need his mom fussing & stressing about "changing" the menu for me. However, since nobody knew, I received lots of food/candy & alcohol gifts this year. /bummer My husband told me in the way home from our long holiday weekend that he was so proud of me & how strong I am! I didn't fall off plan one time & thanks to the turkey dinner I actually surpassed my protein goal for the first time! I won't pretend that my mouth didn't water while decorating Christmas cookies with the kiddos, or while frosting my sons chocolate birthday cake with double fudge frosting. There were definitely a few times that were difficult. It also doesn't help that I have been experiencing a stall on the scale for the last 2 Weeks. (I actually gained 3lbs from water weight, thanks to Aunt Flo visiting me on Christmas day with her ohhh sooo inappropriate gift) I can't complain though. This first holiday has given me some major insight into myself & this whole surgery. Food is fuel. Nothing more, nothing less. I survived NOT eating a cookie. I'm still breathing, everything is functioning, I didn't "go crazy" like I always imagined I would if I "deprived" myself. It's sad that I used to think that way. This surgery was the best Christmas gift I could have ever given myself. I'm so thankful. Happy Holidays everyone! Edit: Forgot to post specifics! I'm now 7 Weeks post op & have lost 32lbs since surgery!

Monday Dec. 17th was my 6 week surgiversary! It's amazing the difference I feel today from 3 Weeks post op!! At 3 Weeks I thought I would never feel normal again & now at 6 Weeks my "new normal" is soooo much better than the "old" normal! I'm already wearing clothes that I couldn't fit into since before I was pregnant with my beautiful 3 year old daughter! My body is changing dramatically & I'm starting to feel that "drop it like it's hawt"" super sexy again!! All I can think about is getting on the dance floor & shaking my new sized booty! haha For the last 2 Weeks I have been hitting the treadmill. The first day I did 20 min & thought I was going to have a coronary. The 2nd day I pushed myself to do 22 minutes. Every day I increase my time by 2-5 minutes & I'm proud to say that yesterday I finished strong at 55 minutes! Never in my life have I been able to do that!! I'm really looking forward to surprising my husbands family this weekend at our Christmas party! Nobody knows I had surgery. I can't wait to get their reactions!! I hope everyone has a fabulous holiday season. Don't deprive yourself, just eat smart & enjoy the holiday! Much Success!

I know, I know!! Where in the H-E-Double Hockey Sticks have I been??! You see I have this issue...you may or may not suffer from it as well, but its called procrastination & I suffer from it badly! Haha I assure you I'm alive! My laptop decided to shut down & never come back on again. Unfortunately not only am I a habitual procrastinator, I am also a perfectionist. Blogging from my phone drives me bonkers because I can't make my posts look pretty! Now then, into the nitty gritty details! I am 4 Weeks out from RNY surgery as of yesterday. I am now on normal foods & doing very well. I have been so lucky through out this process. I have had absolutely no problems (well unless you don't count me forgetting to eat slow & getting ground hamburger stuck in my chest like a kid getting pulled out of a candy store. It sat there for 24 hours!) Lesson learned...don't eat like a starving dog. Mmkayy Next! Weight loss since surgery is 23lbs! That's the fastest 23lbs I have ever lost. I need to increase my fluids & protein. I had no idea it would be this difficult. I was always a huge water & protein shake drinker before surgery, sooo I really thought I would have a handle on it by now. I'm lucky to get 48g protein and 40oz fluids in a day! I'm going to make a few changes starting tomorrow, such as drinking right when I wake up & walking soon after, then protein shake. I have a trip to Florida in January & I'm determined NOT to have to use a seat belt extender on that damned plane! By the way, if you are one of those people who is afraid of TMI...I suggest you stop reading now because its about to get tall up close and personal here! Something that I wasn't expecting or even prepared for is the amount of hormones that are now raging through my body!! All I can think about is sex! My poor husband is going to have to move out of our bedroom to get some sleep. I just caught him slumped over his computer, snoring away & its only 6pm. Gee...I wonder why he's so tired??! ;) So just a quick update on my 4 Weeks of progress. I will post more in a few days. Much Success! ~Amy

Mmmm...nothing beats mushed up food from the blender!! One more small step towards normalcy. I started Pureed food yesterday & I was ready.... like WHOA!!

All week I have been dreaming of fat free refried beans with melted cheese & a little dollop of Daisy! I have been smelling the toast my mom & son have been cooking all week and it has been driving me bonkers!! The funny thing is before surgery, I never ate toast nor did I ever want to eat toast. I have the ultimate skill of always dropping crumbs from everything I eat down my cleavage. Toast crumbs between the girls is never comfortable!!

So, you are probably thinking by now that beans & cheese were my first pureed food right? After all that would make sense, seeing as I would have a dribble of spittle run down the corner of my mouth at just the thought of the tasty meal. Well I'm sorry to disappoint. I went to bed Tuesday evening, excited...just like a little girl on Christmas Eve. When I woke up, I was so afraid to actually put anything  in my pouch! I opted for some Cream of Wheat made with skim milk & sugar free maple syrup. I only ate about half of my quarter cup before I was full. I had a smile on my face when my pouchy accepted it without complaint!! I did have those refried beans for dinner however! I had built up a little more bravery throughout the day. I was pretty proud!

As far as everything else, I'm still fighting some soreness in my left side & a new mysterious sharp pain near my belly button every once in awhile. When taking a shower, I get tired very quickly also. Over all, this has been a very smooth recovery for me & I can't wait to get back to my normal self again!

Best advice I can give to keep your recovery smooth, keep a very positive attitude. No matter what. Best wishes & much success!!

Wahoo!! I survived! That is an accomplishment that I am damned proud of! Haha I had my RNY surgery last Monday Nov. 5th. The surgery went text book smooth. Dr. Taylor found a hernia near my esophagus while he was "inside me" & fixed it. I have had zero complications, just some left side pain & gas as to be expected. I gained 18 lbs in the hospital from fluids & gas, however it is now all gone.

When I weighed myself for the first time at home yesterday, I thought my scale was broken! Not only did I lose the extra 18lbs that I gained from the hospital, but I have also lost 11 lbs of my "real" weight too! In a week??!! That's just crazy talk I tell you! lol I have been sleeping in my recliner because getting into my huge bed & becoming comfortable in it has not worked just yet. I'm working on getting all of my fluids & protein in and I'm not doing to bad so far. Almost there! Also, no vomiting or real nausea yet, but I'm definitely dreaming of refried beans & cheese...or anything that isn't a liquid for that matter! Puree starts Wednesday...C'monnn cottage cheese!!

My family has been simply amazing and I'm so grateful for their support. Overall my experience has been great. I'm extremely thankful it hasn't been the horror story that I imagined it would be the night before surgery! Take care, ~Amy P.S. For some reason when blogging from my phone it won't show paragraph breaks, even though I'm putting them in. Sorry if your eyes are bleeding & your head is pounding after straining to read my posts. This will drive me crazy if I can't figure out how to fix it! :)

What a month this has been! Tomorrow is surgery day for me. It got here quicker than expected! I have been reading, preparing, & hoping things go super smooth. I almost feel like this is happening to someone else, not me. I won't lie & say that I'm totally ready for this surgery. I have been an emotional wreck all weekend. I really need to learn how to shut my brain off sometimes. I swear I could write horror stories for a living!! However, today I finally have a calmness about me. I'm such a strong and determined person. I know that I can do this! I went shopping this morning & bought a new robe & slippers to take to the hospital. My hubby is doing clear liquids with me all day today to support me. Gawd, I love that man! I swear I used up all of my luck in this world when I found him!! This may not be my last blog post before my surgery. If it is be well assured that I'm gonna rock this RNY Owwwwwt!! :)

As of today my surgery is 3 weeks away.  I have PATS next Monday and I'm not sure if I will start a liquid diet 2 weeks before the surgery.  It seems like most people on the forums have to do this, however I haven't received any indication from my surgeon that I will need to yet.

Last night I decided I will have my final "Bad" supper before surgery.  I have been craving chicken strips & french fries from Longhorn Steakhouse.  Hubby & I were on our way home from our "Wrap Party" & we were famished!!  I have been doing relatively good with my eating.  I am trying to lose as much weight as possible before surgery.  However I have been CRAVVVVING these stupid chicken strips for weeks now!!

So I talked him into going to Longhorn Steakhouse last night.  I told him that this is my final "meal" before surgery & batted my eyelashes.  

He is also looking at it as a sort of "last meal" for himself as well.  He is SO supportive of me.  I would never DREAM of asking him to not eat the foods he loves, but he insists that he needs to change his eating habits not only to help me get healthy, but to help himself get healthy.  He is the type of guy that can eat ANYTHING, and I mean anything he wants & as much of it as he wants without gaining an ounce!  At some point, this is bound to catch up with him either in weight or cholesterol.

So we went all out!!  Hubby ordered a full rack of ribs, sweet potatoe with butter, cinnamon & sugar, salad with full fat Italian dressing (Gasp!).  I ordered the chicken tenders, seasoned fries, salad with full fat ranch (gasp) & a cup of cheesy potato soup!!  I didn't finish ANY of it & brought half of my main meal home for my 2 year old to eat for lunch.  But we also ordered a dessert that was to DIE for!!  It is called the Stampede & it is 2 honking size pieces of cake made up of 7 different types of chocolate.  We both took 3 bitess & didn't finish it either!!  The meal was delicious & I was satisfied.  This morning, I honestly feel like I will have no troubles from here until Surgery. 

I am putting myself on a 3 week semi liquid diet.  Mostly comprised of Protein shakes, water, high protein foods & high fiber veggies/fruits.  I'm flushing my body of any built up "crap".  

I'm finally ready for this surgery.  After months of agonizing over it, questioning my choices & decision, my heart is at peace & my mind is prepared.

I have made a promise to myself to follow my surgeons instructions to the LETTER.

I will be strong.  I won't fail at this.  BRING IT ON DR. TAYLOR!!!  

 The closer my PATS get, the more nervous I feel.  

Last weekend I was working a booth at a Women's Expo for my stay at home business.  The sizzle product that I sell happens to Tighten, Tone, Firm the skin & reduce the appearance of stretch marks & cellulite in 45 minutes, with even better progressive results over 72 hours.  Naturally I have a lot of clients who have undergone WLS and have loose, sagging skin.  They love the Ultimate Body Applicator because they get instant results and even better results over time.  It is a huge confidence saver for WLS patients.  (I'm feel like I have a secret weapon to use after my own WLS, so I don't have any anxiety over loose skin worries.)  In fact, I will be starting a vigorous regimen using the Ultimate Body Applicators now to provide good jump start for when WLS happens.

Throughout the expo, I had several ladies approach my booth who have had WLS.  The first day a lady approached me & explained that she had RNY done.  (The same surgery I have scheduled)  The first thing she said after mentioning her surgery was that she would gladly give a gun to anyone who was considering RNY so they could just shoot themselves in the head & get it over with.  (Gasp!)  This lady continued to tell me that she has severe ulcers & other complications.  In fact she threw up blood right before she came to the expo.  All of her family/friends who were with her just stood behind her & nodded their head in agreement.  This lady really rattled me.

The whole drive home, I could not stop talking about this lady to my husband.  I was seriously having 2nd thoughts about going through with my surgery.  I don't have any comorbidities right now and I was really questioning my decision. My husband, who is of course the logical one, reminded me that this is just one lady & her experience.  We have NO idea how well she sticks to the plan, stays away from carbonated drinks, follows her surgeons instructions, etc.  Even though what he said is 100% correct, I still couldn't stop feeling uneasy about it.

The next day while working the expo, I met 2 more ladies who had WLS.  While I was wrapping one of them, I had some personal 1 on 1 time with her.  I confided in her that I have RNY surgery scheduled for Nov 5th & I was second guessing myself.  She looked at me & asked me if I had children, to which I replied I have 3.  A 13 year old, 9 year old & 2 year old.  She told me that being overweight doesn't just affect my own quality of life.  It is also affecting my husband & my 3 children.  She explained that she can't make the decision for me, but for herself she would do it over again 100 times.  Her quality of life is SO different for her & her family.  She has 1 minor complication in the beginning but has stuck to the plan & her surgeons rules.  She hasn't looked back once.  I liked this lady that I had only known for 5 minutes.  She gave me hope & made me feel at peace with my decision.

Today I found out a friend of mine (well aquaintance really) had gone through Lap Band surgery last February.  (I found this out on Facebook of course!!!  Where I find out everything thats news worthy!!)  She had posted a vague post about her doctor putting her on a 500 calorie diet to "jumpstart" her weight loss.  A number of people commented on her status that 500 calories is starving herself & not an efficent way to lose weight.  To which my friend commented that she is following her doctor & surgeons plan & not to worry about her.  People started commenting that her doctor was crazy & that was just unheard of.  Of course since I have been researching WLS & am going through it myself...I put 2 & 2 together.  I sent her a message & she told me to call her.  She told me the day after she got home from the hospital, she couldn't breathe & colapsed.  Her husband had to call 911.  The gas that they filled her with pushed her bowels up & tangled them...putting pressure against her lungs & collapsing them.  Now, She said that her body is fighting the weight loss & it is very rare.  Only 1% of people can develop this issue & it is hormone related.  She has only lost 27 lbs since last February.  Thats 8 months!!  She is really frustrated but working closely with her doctor to get her body in sync to lose the excess weight.

All these things have been playing with my head & emotions.  Lately I have been looking at this last month before surgery as my "Last month" to live.  I know there is that chance that I could not make it through the surgery or right after.  The funny thing is that I am normally a SUPER positive, cheerleader type person!!  I always look for the positives.  I have been holding my children tighter, laughing with them more & giving them more attention.  I have been making sure to tell my husband every night as we lay cuddled before I fall asleep that I love him SO very much.  I have been praying and I am not a religious person.  I just need a "sign" that I'm doing the right thing for myself & family.  I so wish someone would hurry up & invent a crystal ball!!
 

Thanks for letting me get all of my emotions/fears out of my head.  If anyone is actually reading this & got this far, you are a trooper!!  haha

And has a Surgery Date???!!!   THIS GIRRRLL!!  

Finally after being approved for surgery for 36 days now (not that I was counting) I have MY dates!  My PATS are scheduled for October 22nd & the RNY Surgery is scheduled for November 5th!  It's such a relief to be able to plan my life around it now.  I feel like this is finally real, it's going to happen!

I wish I could write like so many others who have gone through this journey & when they heard about WLS they just knew this is what they had been looking for.  I have so many mixed emotions.  Especially now that i have dates!  In the time frame of about 15 minutes after I found out yesterday, I was excited, then scared, excited again, nervous, doubted myself, then empowered myself, excited again!  lol  I'm a basketcase!

To make things worse, last night I had a very vivid dream about the surgery.  As I dreamed that I had my surgery, I could feel the incisions during my recovery.  I was afraid to drink sips of water and got yelled at by my doctor for only getting in 6 oz,  & the very first day after the surgery I shoved a cupcake in my mouth out of "habit" then immediately spit it all out afraid that I was going to "dump".  I woke up this morning thinking I am going to do AMAZING on this journey since I'm already so obsessed and worried that I will mess up.