2 1/2 weeks out

Jan 01, 2011

http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/vsg/4296093/Feel-depressed-and-Regret-at-6-weeks-post-op/action,replies/topic_id,4296093/page,2/

I came here today to see if there were any posts that maybe I could relate to, to help me get thru this hump. All I can say is that I am in a very similar boat right now, and I am so grateful to all of you - Your posts have helped immensely =)

I am about 2 1/2 weeks out, and I have been up and down with the surgery. For the first 4 days I had SERIOUS buyer's remorse, but then I had to give myself a serious talking to ... I was practically suicidal - couldnt imagine a light at the end of the tunnel, but I did get better. It helped to talk, and when I had feelings to try and explore WHY I was feeling that way, not just letting myself go down the emotional path.

My current issue is that I am now on the puree diet, and I am facing that stark realization of my food addiction. I almost cried at the thought of a Taco Bell taco the other day! I had to overeat and wind up vomiting (for the first time since surgery) to make myself realize that - yes, you can eat solid food now, but NO you can still only eat a very small amount. I did alot of research before the surgery, but I think I only focused on the initial complications. I didn't think I was a true emotional eater. Well, I didn't typically eat to stuff my feelings, but I am slowly realizing that I did overeat - I ate too much when I did eat, filled myself, to compensate for something? I don't know yet ... but eventually I will. It is a process.

I think it's safe to say that the reason we had this done is because we needed something that "forced" us to examine our choices and food issues - But that doesn't mean the process of dealing with it will be easy. But its nice to have others we can talk to that understand and share the same problems. You cant always get that from a family member, etc. Sometimes you need people that can relate ... and sometimes you need to see a therapist. There is nothing wrong with it, it's healthy, its normal, and like my Dr said to me about the surgery "It doesnt fix things, its a tool". The message board, talking to friends and family, a therapist, etc - they are all tools we can use to get thru the hard parts. Doesnt make the problems go away, just gives us ways to deal with them and fix them.

I am very grateful for all of you that posted. It has been very inspiring and helpful to me to read all of your experiences, to know that we are not alone - And that one day I will be thinner and healthy AND be able to eat a Taco Bell taco =) LOL

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