Barbara Broxton
Hello ya'll, My name is Barbara . I started this life on 6/27/1970 weighing in at only a hair over 6lbs I am now 5'4 and 38 yrs old and my highest weight 272 and I have been over weight my whole life , from about the age of 6 yrs.I have struggled with all the diets and pills ect, life has thrown some hard balls my way and I have over come whatever life has come up with so far. I have come from nothing ,I was that welfare person for about 4 yrs while raising my son until he started pre k and then I started working 16 hr days and saveing every dime and put myself thru some college classes and become a prison guard I was a single parent for about 7 yrs.Then I was introduced to Richard Broxton on a blind date my mom set me up with that I later married and had a beuatiful baby girl 3 yrs later.We started a small boat dealership and have been in business about 7 yrs now ,so the stress from that and just every day life doesn't help any and everything has caught up with me lately. In the last 19 months I have gained about 70lbs and I've had it ! I have always catered to everyone in my life ,well now it's my turn,He (the hubby)was running around and doing everything he wanted and then some , as I ran the business. It is now my time! So I quit smoking and started looking into the different weight loss surgeries back in April,08 I can't wait to start my new life!!! "Murpheys law here".I was cleared for surgery 2 weeks ago and was set to have surgery at 10:30 am on 11/26/2008 well today at 3:30 on 11/25/08 they call and canceled my surgery and then proceed to give me 3 different reasons from 2 different people why it was canceled and none of the reasons even make sense. Now I start all over again and out $800.00 later.
11/28/08 Ok I found me a doctor, Dr. Alvarez will be doing my vsg Thank you ll for the support!!!!
12/01/2008 Hello ya'll , I hope everyone had a good weekend and nice Thanksgiving!!! I started my liquid diet Friday, I weighed this morning and I weigh 261 !!!
12/7/2008- Hey ya'll only 3 more days to my big S - day I m down to 260 lbs "only 130lbs to go"
12/14/08 I had my vsg on Wed.12/10/08 and I m down 11lbs !!!! Dr.A is the best doctor I have ever meet bar none and so is his staff ,he is a awsome doctor and I wish I could have him for all my medical needs,He is a person that trully cares about you and how you are doing not just about how much money he can make off you.The hospital is small and not so fancy but it is the cleanest hospital I have ever been in compared to the ones I ve been in the states It was spotless and all the staff where very helpfull and showed real concern , forget rest the nurses are checking you every 30 min - 1 hr which was great, and they where on it when it came to being in pain they made sure there was none!!! I was up and walking around in my room 2 hrs after surgery! and walking outside that afternoon! I had barely any pain other then gas pain.I have never not had a surgery that I didn't have some problems or alot of pain except this one and I do believe it is because of the expert skills of my wonderful Dr.Alvarez. He is a all around down too earth great person and an expert in his field I will drive the 4 hrs to see him for any follow ups and just to visit him! Have I told you how awsome he is ,you couldn't find a better dr. then him! 
12/16/08 I weighed again and I know I should only do thisonce a week but I m so excited everytime I get on the scales I see smaller numbers !!!! 247 this morning !!! 15 lbs gone sense Wed. the 10th I love this !
12/29/08 Howdy ya'll I weighed this morning and I m 240 omg I love this, I m still stinking to mostly liquids but I have tried some solids,like cheese , soft eggs ect. but it is easier for me to stay with the liquids just for a little longer I think .I m so glad I picked Dr.Alvarez to do my surgery he is the best !! He has done over 700 of this sugeries and considering that most of the doctors here in the states have only done a handful I would go to Mexico again.My hubby is planning to have his done next fall and also having Dr.A do his also! Hes going to be (more) of a hotty lol. I m feeling better and better everyday , I m learning alot also like its you really do have to eat "SLOW " and do not gulp your water that hurts sip, sip, and sip just take your time and do allow time for your meals.I get what feels like air bubbles and I know I m done they gurgle it is kinda of annoying I can hear them they sound like their coming from the center of my chest wierd I know just letting ya'll know what I m feeling ect. I am still haveing diarhea almost every day some days are worst then others. But I would do it all again in a heart beat!
12/30/2008 My son's real father called yesterday ! He had stints put in his heart to clear blockages! That was hard to believe I didn't know he had a heart ! So now he has started calling me and texting me like nothing and like I m suppose to drop it all and go running back to him.He had left me when I became pregnant with our son back in 1991 and all the crap he put me through after that .I just can't believe men can be so dumb and expect us women to forget all the crap they pull .He was married when we meet and lied about it when I finally found out I was so stupid ly in love with him I didn't care and I was pregnant along with the wife uh hu he had us both knocked up! 6 months apart !I was young and dumb was a understatement I was 18 when I met him he was in the army and very good looking.we dated from 1989 to 1991 ,2 weeks before my 21st b-day I find out I am pregnant and he gets sent off to Germany imagen that! I heard all the lines ,I just couldn't believe I was going to be a single parent that wasn't planned! Hell he never even paid child support untill my son was 10yrs old ! Those first 7 yrs where hell for both my son and myself we where homeless for a time and it was just a very bad time in my life but I (we) made it. Now he is calling and texting and telling me that he has always loved me and wants me to leave my husband to run off to KY with him ! I still can't believe guys can have that big of balls.He divorced the wife he was with back then and had remarried well guess what she left him for another female I told him I wouldn't be telling to many people that lol. So now he is fixin to be 47 on the 1st and alone and all of a sudden he has been thinking about me alot .Sounds to me like he is getting old and he dosn't want to be alone like I told him he would end up if he kept doing women the way he was doing them. It is all coming back to bite him in the ass! He hurt me so bad it almost killed me.My son saved me! So to anyone out there that finds yourself in a similar sition do not fall for that crap of I am going to leave my wife for you it is all lies and ask yoursefl why is it so easy for him to do that to her then don't think for a minute it wouldn't happen to you too.My husband cheated on me April 21-28, 2007 all men cheat I really believe that!, my dad did ,and every man I have ever met has! I m just now getting to the point I can forgive my husband and for the longest I thought I was being paid back for haveing my affair with my sons dad ,but no that was not true men are just dogs and if they think they can get away with it they will cheat I trully believe that ,and why I have asked that question a hundred times and I still can't get a straight answer! Anyway I had my ranting spell and ya'll learned alot more about me lol. So why do we gain weight and feel uncomfortable haveing sex hmmmmm! I wonder why.? Goodnight. Tomorrow will be much better.
1/04/2009 Hope everyone had a great new year!!! I stayed up watching Dick Clarks Rockin New years Eve and watched the ball drop .I want to go watch it live next year!! I haven't lost anything this week still 240lbs yuck, But My hubby will be joining me on my weight loss trip.He has decided to get the vsg , April 2,2009 so we can be losers together!!We have contacted Susan at Dr.Alvarez 's practise and he will be doing his surgery too. Im so happy for him and for us!!! so thats all thats going on here ,back to work tomorrow and kids back to school.I m glad the holidays are over,I love Christmas but so glad when its over too.
1/09/2009 - Im at 239 I went 10 days with no weight loss ,but I m losing inches my clothes aren't fitting " too big ya" !!!
Well I have gotten my days and nights mixed up and it really sux trying to get back on track,I m up till 1 or 2 in the morning then I get the kids up for school and then back to bed I go.The couple days I did stay up and go into work(I own the business) I m a total bitch cause I m so tired.Then all the stress there I hate going in,I use to love handling it all and being there but now I hate getting out of the bed,this is really hurting me as far as me getting exersize in .I m not doing any O I m eating right and very little I can take about 5 or 6 bites and Im done.But I need to walk or something.I m still on the anti depressants I just don't want to deal with all the everyday crap Im tired of the same ol same ol . But then if I don't go in then crap doesn't get done.It's a losing battle.I really don't hang out with anyone except the hubby. He leaves tomorrow for a Bass Tournament and won't be back untill the 16 th or 17 th so much for taking off this year to let me take a break from the shop.-so like it or not I have to go in all next week .yuck,yuck! Its bad I used to love this business(boat dealership) now I almost hate it .I m 8 months cig free nonsmoker baby ya.I did it cold turkey ! Now the weight is going, I have made alot of changes in my life and for the better and healther.Now if I can just get off my butt and start walking I know I d see more weight drop off faster,Im thinking about joining a gym but don't know what the hubby will think about that.
I think I will check into that while hes gone and just see if I like going maybe try something like Curves.I will keep ya'll posted.I m going to post some pics also I will be 1 month post op tomorrow 1/10/09.Have a great weekend everyone!
1/11/09 -
236 today yippeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1/28/2009 I m 228 hmmm 10 lbs pre op so a total of 44 lbs baby .not to bad .Hubby and I had words today I stayed home and didn't go into the shop and pretty much slept all day . I got up at 3 pm and started cleaning house. He came home from the shop and I was joking and flirting with him saying I played with myself today and was thinking of him he got mad!!! And accussed me of wanting his friends what kind of shit is that .I ll tell you what If I wanted his friends I could have already had a few of them!!!!
and it has nothing to do with the wieght issue either! I think there is too much focus on sex nowa days.Everytime I turn around sex is a issue .I m sick of it ,its all ove rthe tv ,radio,its everywhere you look. Is it just me ? Is there something wrong with me that I don't want sex 24/7 once or 3 times a week is good for me .I m trying to make myself happy and healthy and I keep getting shot down.I want my husband to be loving and respectful of what I 've been thru in my life.I was molested as a child and forced to do things that now I m a pro at now but I hate having the sex issue pushed on me its a big turn off!!! and thats all he(hubby) wants bjs or the butt!! Hello we don't even kiss anymore its give it up and roll over and go to sleep,no I don't want to cuddle!!! I m not crying about that it just its all about him.What about me! I always try and make sure he gets everything he wants and need s he is going for surgery April 2 omg he s going to me a sex monster when he loses his weight, I 'll be be forgot about Im sure guess we'll wait and see but mark my words.Once a cheater always a cheater Im afriad he will become a man slut.
I do flirt with his friends but its all in fun its not like they take me serious hell I flirt with some of the customers also thats just part of me. He (hubby)won't flirt with me in public he pushes me away and makes me feel like hes embarrassed of me.I feel so alone at times and wish I could run away from everything and everybody. I guess I just feeling sorry for myself I need to snap out of it and get a grip hu. These anti depressants I thought would work better then this! Men suck!!!! plan and simple all of them! Boy could I screw him up !! If I did do something!!!!
if he keeps pushing me I won't be responsiable for what happens.O well enough for tonite. I have ranted and raved enough. 
2/05/2009 Well I weigh 227 lbs and I have joined curves last week I have been going every day except Sunday and Wed. I m haveing problems with solids still they either hurt me or I get sick yuck will this change and then I m not sure if I want it too.. I have sold a few boats this week yippee for me , I was also told that I m very flirty well du that is just part of me if I can't be me who can I be .I have always been that way. People are starting to see a change in me, I m wearing makeup (ya me) and dressing better I m feeling better about myself before I would wake up wash my face brush my hair throw a visor on and some sweats and t-shirt and go, what a way for the owner of a boat dealership to dress hu . Well now I m actully dressing up a bit and fixing my hair ( got it cut off) too short ) O well it will grow back right?! It takes some getting used too for me .It does make my head look smaller and my neck lol and hubby and I have made up and aren't fighting this week(lol) Stress really sucks and working together 24/7 really sucks.I love him but man he can be such a butt head!!!! I guess I can be too. There I said it I can be a major Biitch when crossed or not listened too. Well I will write more tomorrow.Its getting late and I do have to work and get kids to bed o' boy thrill thrill!!! So I m down 45 lbs total yippee!!! Goodnight.
02/12/09 I weighed 225 this morning, and it is my boy's Birthday the big 17 I can't believe he is almost grown where did the time go, he is always running to school then to work I hardly ever see him any more
!! Hubby is going to Del Rio fishing a bass tournament or at least pre fishing I should say O' BOY so I get weekend to myself with the kids and the shop to run "lucky me" actually it isn't as stressful when he is gone sounds bad but it is so true.I have joined curves and I like it I try and go every other day or every 2 days , Thanks Brandy for pulling me out of the bed and helping me get my head together for now anyway lol.This wls is such a learning experiance.I have went from one extreme to the other, I used to love food now I hate it !!Wierd hu. I hear alot of people that has these surgeries become depended on drugs or alchole I haven't done any of that and I wonder if I m going to transfer 1 addiction for another I hope not!!!!
Well going to bed I have a long weekend ahead and it has already been a long week already.
02/15/09 Well o well I m at 222 that 's 50 lb gone ya baby ,I have decide to go to curves like every other day it works better for me that way .Im on week3,I hate their scales there off by about 3 lbs I spoke to my Ms Susan and she has informed me to just go by my scales sense thats what I started with and to also not let the scales rule me ,I have went from a 24 to a 16/18 depending on hows its made of course!!!! I LOVE THIS VSG !!! Monday is coming to fast yuck, best part I go 2 curves in the am. I have found my addiction shopping yep thats it ,well it could be worse.lol
222 YIPPEE who would have thought it.
02/21/09 Im at 219 baby 4 lbs from what I was when I meet my hubby , I had a very hard weekend it was terriable my blu heeler puppy Domino came down with parvo Thur. evening and we took him to the vet Friday morning, Saturday morning I got a call he was doing very bad and he would need to go to the ER hospital where he would recieve 24 hr treatment I said ok what ever it would take to help him! Then my brother in law calls me about opening the shop ,we don't open untill 10 am he was there at 9 thats on him , I get there at 10 and I have customers wanting a lake trip in the boat they had drove 6 hrs in for! BNL couldn't take them he had a birthday party to go to so I told him to go (he didn't) I had another employee take them and guess what they ran out of gas imangen that , I take them gas brothern law jumps in the truck with me I bring another boat just in case I need to pull them in well that boat doesn't have a drain plug this is really a bad day anything that can go wrong is ! I go back to where they have beached the boat that ran out of gas and I fall down the rock cliff and bruise my hip and twist my ankle need I say more, I get up and get to the boat and throw a robe and I figure we will just walk the boat to the ramp right , nope tooo many rocks and then the brother n law threatens to slap the shit out of me because why I still don't know he just lost his freakin mind I guess. I was just trying to get everyone out of the wind and get the boat back on the trailer silly me for trying to figure out a way to do that without him he is such a asshole, I told him I m not his wife and to get steppin just cause he slaps her around doesn't mean he will slap me!! The customer was there too heard all the f words and the threats and he took his shoes off and rolled his sleeves up and was readyto beat brother n law's ass yep the customer came to my rescure this was a very upsetting weekend.The man still bought the boat from me can you believe that , with all the drama that went on , I didn't know what to do .I offered him his money back and to comp his room and gas he said no baby I want the boat and for me not to stress out over something I had no control over what a guy and his wife was a sweet heart too and there kids where such angels thank God they where in the truck when the BNL was making a ass of himself in front of there dad. I still don't know what I said or did to piss him off , if he ever comes near me again I will have him locked up! I know that was so off my weight loss topic but you know stress can cause wieght gain and I want to track everything to see if things that happen to me can slow my weight loss and so on , stay away from nutty brother n laws and don't take any shit from any man! I fthey hit you find a way and leave they don't care about you if they have to beat you or hit you another leason of been there done that , run away !!! O the hubby was away fishing a tournament and I had the kids ,house and shop and lets not forget the employees and pets that are sick, Galgone take me away is a understatement!!! And I still managed to loss 3 lbs over the weekend hmmmm .Have a great week.
03/04/2009 I have lost 57 lbs to date yippeee I can wear a size 14 or 16 depends on the make but as of today I bought me some 14 leveis and they fit and are a little lose in the legs ya baby, Its been another stressful week as always, I m now in trouble for helping my mom with her electric bill .I give up themore I help people the more crap I catch. My puppy died the weekend of the 2/21 , my hip has been realy giving me problems ever sense I fell that weekend also I m thinking I need to go see the dr. and I m feeling run down and tired alot all I want to do is sleep. I love to sleep, isn't that bad, but when I m sleeping I have nothing to deal with , no snoring hubby ,no kids(there at school) no thinking ...I know this isn't healthy and I thought I was breaking that habit when I started going to curves and working out but I still feel like crap most days this depression sucks!!! how do you beat this shit.????
03/07/09 I weighed in at 213 "HELLO" 68 lbs to go I can't believe it. This gastric sleeve is great I wish they had it 10 yrs ago,and I wish I had it done so much sooner it is changing my life I eat better (I really don't even like food anymore) I eat to live not live to eat !!! Yep another stressful week and weekend RICHARD the hubby has been being a real butt .I feel like he has been starting fights with me for no reason.I went in today and told them at work I would be there in about an hour , when I get there the secreatary is coming in with Subway Richard had gotten everyone something for lunch except my daughter and myself and they knew we where coming in ,I spoke up and ask why didn't they get anything for us and Richard throws his sub down and starts saying just 'F' it and walked off so I told him to 'F" you and "F"off and my daughter(6yrs old) and I left .She even wondered why her daddy didn't get her anything for lunch .I thought that was just rude on his and the secreatary's part!!!! I always see if anyone wants something when I m out getting food. He makes me feel like he doesn't want me around and for the last few weeks he startes fights with me knowing I will just leave."God help him if I find out he is messing around on me again"there will be hell to pay!!!!
I am having hanging skin already , in my arms and neck and legs it is gross. I will be having it removed asap. My boobs look like flat cakes thank goodness for wonder bras!!!So I will also be getting a boob job too. Well thats all today , 
03/10/2009 211 lbs and I will going to Las Vagas baby on the the 27 th of this month for that weekend for Dr.Alvarez's Patient Reunion I can't wait it is going to be so much fun , hubby will be going also!! Last time I week which was my first time I ended up with the flu and a very bad upper respitory infection thought I was dying!!! I bought some size 16 shorts and they are too big I can't believe it, when I was this size 10 yrs ago I couldn't wear a 14 so I don't understand it all I can figure is that 20-30 lbs is just very lose skin around my belly is is very soft and hell I don't know I just know it is different from before and I can't figure out how I can wear a size 14 . !!!! but I m not complaining.I don't think I have been in a 14 sense I was in highschool or even middle school crazy hu. I m so glad I had vsg done and I so glad I stopped ssmoking it has been 10 months smoke free and it was easier then trying to lose weight on my own .Now if I can just stop all the tiredness I 'd be good .I love my sleep time and I always have and I know I m sleeping my life away and there will plenty of time for sleep when I died and gone so how do I kick the sleep habit? well goodnight ya'll. later
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Guillermo Alvarez M.D. www.EndoBariatric.com 112 Rodrigo Andalon St. Suite A Piedras Negras Phone: 1-866-MY-SLEEV Fax: (888) 453-0791 Visit Website |
I highly recommend him to anyone tired of the yo-yo diets and fad diets, and that have tried everything under the sun! He is the best in his field and if you want the best here he is!!! We had our patient reunion this past weekend in Las Vegas Baby and it was awsome to say the least! I had a blast and learned so much from his past patients. I will also be going to the plastic surgern in Montarrey Mexico for the total body left and boobs job (WE CAN'T FORGET THE PANCAKES) I do mean pancakes. Later all be back later.03/31/09 I m at 205 I can't believe it!!! just 60 more to go till my goal of 145 woohoo!!
Hubby and I leave tomorrow for Eagle pass,TX so he will be having his vsg done 4/2/09 he will also be joining the losers bench and Dr.Alvarez will also be doing Richards' surgery. He was very impressed with him and the care I recieved when he was there with me .I will try and get him to post for himself but he really isn't into this posting thing,so I will be posting for him and myself and taking his pics before and after.Ya'll have a great night and I will post soon and let everyone know how the hubby does.03/03/2009 Well hubby had his vsg and is in a lot of pain , he seems to have a very low pain tolerance poor baby , and the fact his sleeve swelled did not help it any.I was told that happens 1 out of 100 and of course he would be that 1! Me on the other hand am out of the 200's yippee 199 baby omg I can't believ it.I love my sleeve and I know in time Richard will too ,I think it will take him more time to get used to it ,right now he is asking himself why he did this but Dr Alvarez stated he really did need this surgery !! His (hubby) stomach was wrapping itself around his spleen and he has alot of internal body fat around his organs the kind that clugs arterious and cause heart attacks he also stated that Richard(hubby) just added years to his life by doing this vsg surgery.Dr.A has done it again saved yet another life! He is a wonderful Dr. we couldn't have asked for a better person to take care of us he and his staff are # 1 in our book and our hearts for all they have done for us. Richard and I will be able to be healthy together and grow old together and spend more time with our kids and play and do the things we just couldn't do before this surgery.We are so thankful for Dr. Alvarez and his staff they are a true God send.Richard is resting now thank God! The gas really bothers him.I told him to walk thru it and get plenty of rest .Well Im gonna go find me a poker table on my puter of course and post again in couple days later ya'll have a great weekend!
04/08/09 What the hell I GAINED LIKE 4 lbs
THIS SO SUX!!!04/12/2009 Ok I guess I had gained water weight from living on beef jerky while hubby was getting his surgery I didn't relieze it had so much salt (bad bad bad) it's all good now I m back down to 200 thats 72 lbs gone !!!! I can't believe it I still see the big gross fat chick in the mirror, when does that change?, but I went and bought my first pair of Rocky jeans this weekend size 12/14 omg I just can't believe it!!! My head sees one thing but my body shows something totally different. Head games (I don't like ) specially when it is my head playing the games it's just not right! Hubby is down 30 lbs total wow wow wow
I m so proud of him but he seems to be able to drink as much as me ????whats up with that? he is rushing it a bit I do believe and he has cheated with icecream shakes also ,hell I couldn't do ice cream untill 6 weeks out .I don't do much but I have tried it.He has alot of boredom hunger, head stuff I warned him about that but he isn't listening to me!!!! He will just have to learn on his own I guess!He 's a grown man Im not going to baby him and make his stuff for him noone did that for me.So what do ya do? I do so much love my sleeve no regrets here , I have 55 lbs to go .I will be going back to curves tomorrow another try at that , sense I hadn't been in a month due to my hip being hurt of course, and me being lazy!!!! Well I m waiting on my sister to show up with my little girl.She was suppose to spend the night with my parents but she wants to come home because my dad is being mean and ugly to her .I don't understand him he shows such faverism towards them kids, my son Michael can do no wrong but my dad is so mean to the girls (granddaughters) should be no surprise he was a ass to us girls growing up too.I just thought with him getting older and all he would be nicer! Thats what I get for thinking again hu???!!!!! Enough ranting and raving.Ya'll have a good night ,later!04/15/2009 Well I seem to be at a sta I keep going from 199-202 whats the deal? it is driving me crazy!!!Richard on the other hand is really over doing it eating stuff he shouldnt yet !! It has been 2 weeks and he is eating solids!!!!
I just dont understand him! He can eat more then me also .... I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND. He also has stated he wishes he had never none this ..I warned him and I told him everything how I have felt and god just everything and he sees what I ve been thru and he just does want ever he wants its like he isn't even trying . Why would anyone spend that kind of money just to go back to the same stupid eating habits ,!??? I m so mad at him, YOU KNOW WHAT HE IS A BIG BOY I M NOT GOING TO BABYSIT HIM anymore!!!!!This is my time you either want this or you dont!, you can't just do it for or because of someone else!!It has too be for you!I really believe that.!!!!So you have to have your mind set, and really really want it!
04/21/2009 I weighed this morning and I m at 198 and I ve been ......OmG I cant believe it , I havent been under 200lbs in about 7 yrs and then it was only after I had my daughter and ended up very, very sick and had a staff infection in the c-section .ouch I had lost 68 lbs in 6 weeks that was a weight loss record!!! I have seen that I m lossing weight slower and losing my hair faster
so I m trying to up my protein intake.It is just so hard for me to eat I really ,really don't like eating.It hurts ,I like drinking milk ,I put some protein mix in there and choc syrup (yummy) but hey it doesn't hurt.I know I m not getting enough in and I have to work on that. Richar is still not doing what he is suppose to do and is paying the price he does not feel good at all and yes he is only going on 3 weeks out and is eating the same crap he ate before the surgery , chicken fried steak ..brownies,coke slirppees and he says well it not carbonated omg why get wls and spend 10k bascially then go back to eating the same chit ,whats the deal people.? Then he says that I quote him" you will loss weight regardless" because you are eating less".I get so mad at him so its like then dont cry to me when you hurt or feel bad or hey can I eat this or that then do the opposite of what I tell you..Here's your sign!!!!! Well later ya'll04/29/09 Howdy ya'll I weighed this am and I m at 197 onederland yippee !!!! the weight loss has slowed down a bit but I think its because Im back at work more (back to the stress) or I heard that you do hit a plaetu or what ever its called I m sure I miss spelled it I sux at spelling. But anywho maybe with the slow down my skin can play catch up alittle and shrink up abit I hope, under my chin and neck are bad and I do have the bat wings thing going on , and the inside top of my legs OMG looks like I have balls hanging (yuck, yuck< and gross) plastic surgery here I come well next year for sure after the rest of the weight is gone!I cant wait , only 52 more lbs to go to goal!!!!!!!!!!Im really getting the looks and attention from the guys here and the guy at the dollar store now all of a sudden helps me take my stuff to my truck, Im still the same person inside that kinda bugs me that people treat me so different now what a differance 75 lbs make.I mean I know its better but I should have been treated that way before too I should have been helped with my things all along, just because your fat doesn't mean your super woman . I dont know bout men there such asses, but I do like the attention I cant lie bout that , It 's confussing at times for me feeling the way I do at time Before I was treated like 1 of the guys now its like o honey let me get that for you , and 1 of the hubby's friends called me baby on the phone yesterday he has never called me that (giggle giggle) O well it was flattering. I be back later. Gotta get ready for work ugh!!!
05/12/2009 - 190 lbs wow, wow that s all I can say" I love my vsg" I walked past a mirror in Walmart and I had to take a double take I couldnt believe that was me in that mirror, and hey I looked cute!! I did I did ,lol my sister cut and colored my hair, its short and spiky and she put me some heavy blonde chucks in it, it looks awsome I just cant believe the change in me. Richard has lost right at 46 lbs he had his surgery April 2, 2009 so he's about 5 weeks out . Granted he doesn't do what he is suppose to and trys to eat the same old crap he did before but just a couple bites and he is done!!! and hurting!! yep if you over do it ,it will hurt bad, Dam I told him about that part and he didnt listen to me. he will have to live and learn! as I did. "DONT OVER EAT IT WILL HURT BAD OR MAKE YOU SICK" " please listen " learn from me ok. O and somedays my choca milk goes down great but there are some days omg it doesnt , and boy do I know it! Later ya'll gotta go to bed , hubby makeing nme go in to work tomorrow "yuck" I hate mornings I love eafternoons yes I do and nights.
05/23/2009 wieght -186 "hell ya baby" I love this , I wish hubby did to but he is haveing issues, he is down to 294 from 345 ,He says he is feeling better but the eating thing or say the lack of eating bothers him. He thinks he can go back and eat the same crap as before and another thing is the good food you might be able to eat then "NO U CANT" 1 day it might be fine the next day O hell no ...stomach is not haveing anything to do with it!!! I have told him this ,but he does not listen duh!!
We have been fighting alot also I thought this would bring us closer together but it seems we fight more, He's a jealous person and so am I so that is bad!!!! I m trying to deal with it the best I can. But after all the crap he did the last 2 yrs I just dont know , my depression isnt helping matters any I need to go back top me dr. my meds arent working like they used to. I have been really sleeping alot and feeling worthless.I have had some dumb thoughts just because of all the fighting and it seems that nothing I do is good enough for anybody , enough of the stupid stuff . I left last Saturday and went to TN and OHIO and KY , MS ,AL,LA,GE and AR 7 states totel I needed a get a away and thats is what pissed the hubby off this time. We have made up for now god I hate fighting with him.B back later
05/24/09 Im back , well I was talking about my little trip I took to the states I listed above, sometimes you just need to get away ....and get back to where you came from so you don't forget how far you've come and where you came from! I came from a very small , very poor town in Ohio ,and it has not changed a whole hell of lot let me tell you. It was like stepping back in time! You dont see alot of newer cars (80s and 90s ) just a few late modals... all the houses are the same as when I left when I was 10! There is alot of perscription drug abuse going on there also and the girls/women have kid after kid after kid.. and many by different guys, I THANK GOD and my mom for getting us out of there when we where so young or I might have ended up the same way.. Its just a very different way of life there, people live very poor and it didnt appear to me they wanted anything better for themselfs. I dont understand the drug thing it seemed to me everyone was taking the same perscription drugs what is up with that ? I kept hearing them talk about hydrocox something and how additive it is well why in the hell would the doctors give it out like water then?? I really dont understand it .I think somebody needs to check into that small town ????!!!! something was for sure going on there but maybe it was just where I hadn't been around that kind of stuff who knows.
Anyway I really dont what to forget where I come from!!! and I have came along way ! I loved seeing my family and none of them reconized me that was so funny I'll post some of the pics I got , the mountains where beautiful I got pics of them too. I hung out in TN with my cousin Chris she is so pretty she has long blonde hair and big blue eyes that are green some times cause she is so full of chit at times lol ,I LOVED hanging out with her she was my co polit on our trip to OH we hadn't hung out sense we where kids ,we where so much alot it was crazy , we even had alot of the same outfits , same shampoo, same perfume too it was so funny ... it was like looking in my own closet here at home! I plan on going back in July and taking my little monster too. Noone has ever meet my daughter so she will get to see where her mommy came from . Richard (hubby) and I have been getting along pretty well sense I ve been back, I was figureing he would either see what I do do , or figure he could do it all without me it could have back fired on me but it went the way I wanted and thats all the matters. He took my daughter and me to the dinner and a movie last night and we had a blast, I sat right beside him just like we used to do when we where dating with his arm around my shoulders and everything it was cute!! I know I jump from one subject to another ...Its just whatever pops in my head I put it down, lol stay with me here. ... The sex is getting better too!!! I have sex drive back omg I just thought I hated sex!!! due to the fact of all the bad stuff that had happened along with it! But I m getting aroused again .. fat is so bad for us and I had alot of it on me , it was getting to the point I was haveing promblems cleaning myself after I went to the bathroom that is really terriable, I couldnt even see my you know what, except in the mirror I m telling you it was bad. I was mad and upset all the time and seemed to always be on the defence about everything, and I was haveing problems dealing with men alot to I had a attitude towards them ... that seems to be getting better I guess I still dont trust any of them as far as I can throw em but Im working on that too. I had my good days and my bad days mostley bad so it got to the point I dont /didnt want to go to the shop I didnt want to deal with anything and I still dont but I have got to get my ass out of the house and back to the buisness that he and I have built,I will be making me an appointment with my doctor next week to discuss my meds and see I f I can get some help with this depression crap,I wish I could just kick it and be done ...I guess everyone that has this problem wishes that hu? I love my VSG ,, It is teaching me to deal with my problems and not run to food like I did before , that was alot of Richards and my problems too when we are/where upset we ran out to eat and now we have to deal with it face to face (yuck and its not pretty) and we just ha dthis revolation sense I got back well I did anyway and I brought it to our attention and I think he agrees with me. We are also working on our communaction or lack there of should I say but we see the problem and are working on it .. thats good!! Ok I have spilled my thoughts and ranted and raved I feel better now and I will be back tomorrow everyone have a good day and good weekend.
06/03/2009 I m at the conclusion Im stuck between 186 - 192 is this normal? Also I spoke to soon about Richard and I !! We started fighting again over the shop(our business) I have asked him to move out or I will, I told him I'll help open the new shop we are building on the new property on hwy 36 out by Belton lake then Im done We should have it up and running by August we'll see. Im sick of fighting with him over everything! I swear the only thing we agree on is that we fight over evrything!!!! I don't want my 7 yr old seeing us fight all the time,or my 17 old its not worth it . Life is way to short to be so dam sad and mad,and upset all the time,I think thats why Im at a stand still with my weight is that possiable? So much for thinking our wls would bring us closer, we are growing more and more apart by the day! He is getting more and more controlling and it is driving me crazy! Thats another thing he does he is always calling me crazy or refers to me as his crazy ass wife, boy do you feel the love ?? We have a love / hate relationship !!! !!! I hate to love him and love to hate him at times! What do I do??? Im at a loss we have so much crap together this is going to be a nightmare in the making!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I sure do hope ya'll learn from my mistakes yep I make mistakes lol believe it or not, I just dont know how to save our marriage,??? I need help and Im not getting it from him thats for sure.It should'nt be this hard loving someone! or living for that matter. live and learn,and do not do it again!!!!
06/17/09 Weight as of this morning 184!! I m back to running the shop again, I swear I cant be gone 1 day without someone calling me for something mainly Richard, imagen that ! So he is done 68 lbs and he admits it is getting easier fro him, I m down 88 lbs hell ya baby!!!! and feeling good and a little sexy
! Im not goinhg to discuss him and I yes we are fighting pretty much all the time, he is very very jealous and its getting worse!Shit happens and life goes on. Later ya'll06/26/2009
Same ol same ol... 
I traded in my big yellow dodge last Saturday and got myself a brand new 2010 Mustang can you say hell ya!
and I fit in the seat ! Its white and dam it is pretty! I havent drove a car in about 12 years that takes some getting use to but I really like this car it is so sharp! I"ll get some updated pics of me and it together on here soon. Well tomorrow is my birthday and quess what yepper hubby and I are still fighting imagen that...Im sick and tired of fighting with him... what a way to bring in my 39 th bday OMG 39 years old I dont know if I want to cry or laugh or what.... 39 I keep saying it to myself but I dont really feel that age somedays I feel like Im 20+ then other day s 100+ lol, Ive had a few siezures this past week in my sleep... 
could be from the stress of fighting with u guessed it, but who knows,it might be just my screwed up head.I was doing so good I hadnt had 1 sense before my VSG I thought maybe they where gone now there back I gotta get it back under control this sucks! But I got a new car !!!!!! woohoo
Later ya'll
07/08/09 I hope everyone had a Great and save 4 th of July!!! I weigh 179 lbs woohoo wow179 its hard to believe only 34 -40 lbs left I still dont see it I wish my head would catch up ... I traded my 2008 Dodge crew cab 1500 bright Yellow truck in for a 2010 Bright White Mustang leather loaded! not the GT but this little sucker is like so fast! Im glad I got just the V6 and I fit in there!!!! I think thats why I have drove trucks for the last 12-14 yrs just because I was so big they had more room for my big gut ! I really like this Mustang it is so cute! Richard was so pissed at me for getting it because I didnt ASK him ...I dont think so scooter !He didnt sign for it I got it on my own! Richard and I have had make up sex again, then fight ,then make up sex .... crazy shit!!! I was told by a customer of mine that Im becoming a very beautiful woman
...Another 1 texted/emailed me and told me 'Good morning Beautiful" and told me to have a good day at work! I just thought that was so sweet! 2 in 2 weeks hmm what a differance 93 lbs makes! I have never been told I was beautiful ...from my husband ( He has called me kinda cute am I a puppy!?)or anyone other then my mom of course! I m feeling more girly too the sex drive is coming back too I think... I have bought some sun dresses and they are really pretty I think so anyway... and so do some of the guys that hang around the shop
lol I dont know bout all this attention Im getting I really really like it but it kinda makes me mad at times too...Im still the same person on the inside... granted I m more happy with my self and I think I am running the shop better and Im not as snappy.I had a consult with a ps here in Temple at Scott and White ... their smoking crack!!! or something the dr gave me a price of 30k when I can go to Mexico and have it done for half that cost or less ! These U.S Dr.'s better get a grip they are over charging us and Im not going to pay them chit.. I will take my wings and sagging skin to Mexico ! Dr.A will refer me to a good PS Im sure. Well Im gonna hit the sack. It has been a long day...week. !
07/28/2009 well Im still at 179 Lbs and my poor little Mustang I bought for myself well ... I was in a accident on the 7/14 a lady ran a stop sign and t boned me on my side thank god (my little girl was in the passanger seat) we both had to go by abulance to the ER and be checked out ... then like 2 days later I ended up back in the ER for my my left hip hurting so bad I could barely walk on it! I have a contusion on the hip and I my neck and back have been hurting me. I was sent to a chro first time for that I go back tomorrow for my 3 rd visit ...I dont know bout that stuff he does popping me and vibraters and such I think the p!ain is getting worse , last night and this morning my hip was hurting so bad again I couldnt get out of bed! I dont even know where they took my car to... It was at a body shop then the other persons ins. picked it up and took it somewhere else they called me telling me it is fixable I was bad and told them I do not want a new wreaked car ...it is dimunation of value and has a car fax report to go with it and that is not what I bought ... well I guess by Tx LAWS their ins only has to fix the car and I dont have any say whether I want it back or not thats straight up bullshit, who loses the money of whats it worth now I do not them! I didnt buy a wreaked car why should I be forced to pay for a car that has been wreaked !? So never the less Im pissed off and I will be contacting a lawyer about this bs. I m not upset with the women who hit but her ins company ...all ins companies for that matter.There take,take ,and take then you have to fight to get them to pay for shit that they have already been paid for! So if your a Good lawyer contact me please if your not A FIGHTER then you need not contact me.So another drama filled day in my life!! O and lets not forget the employee that has gave me a fake cashiers check yep fake.. supposely the wife done it but this will make the 3 rd time he has given me a bad check.... I m going go ahead let him go tomorrow.I m done! I really liked him too and have always tried to help him if he needed help some people you just cant help! what else has happened O I hired a new secreatary and the hubby has the hots for her and admitted to it!!!! then today along with the bad check thing my son has a flat on his car and has no jack... and my little girl is with him drama drama drama!!!! And I m told I m crazy and I wonder why I m the way I m! I sure hope everyone elses day has been better!!! Tomorrow will be better right ??
09/12/09 howdy ya'll been awhile but Im back. I be at 178lbs and in a size 8 baby as of today!!!!! which is wired I havent really lost any wieght this whole summer : ( but Im down in jeans sizes ect!!!! I havenever beeen in a single digit size ever!!!.. same drama feeled life .... hubby and I have been fighting bad will it ever get any better!? I fired the secreatary he had the hots for.. and we got into it bad he actually put his hands on me... then he did it again yesterday! He s been grapping me from behind by my throat and I told him the next time he puts his hands on me it will be the last time he does anything! I wish I could walk away from this bullshit ,....its easier said then done... I wish he would just leave....and I have told him too! Anywho I got my Mustang back and Im afrid to drive the dam thing its like I have bullseye on my back I have been in almost 3 more accidents in that car! So I have parked it and took my Ford f150 back from the shop and told them no more shop truck! I cant believe how they almost destroyed that truck! I had bought it brand new in 06 .. so I had the front fixed from hitting a deer and today I had new brakes and new tires put on it!! it drives like a new one by god! O Richard is down 95 lbs also he is down from a 48 to a 36 pants he looks good but acts like such a asshole.. I really dont think we're going to make this work and it breaks my heart it really does, its like we just keep dragging it out. And we already know the ending! misery loves company dam that seems so true! I need help and dont know how to ask for it or who to ask... that old saying cheaper to keep em also rings true... I just want to scream !!!
But hey Im in a size 8 baby and if all the skin was gone I would probly be in a 5/6 or smaller! I cant wait till ps time Im sure Ill be not sayin that when I actually have it done but we'll see. Well everyone take care later babes.
10/02/09 I bought a pair of size 6 jeans just for shits and giggles and I laid on the bed I can zip em up lol !!! Im at 175 but I have alot of hagging belly skin and my arms and top of my legs.... yuck .I want to start getting plastic surgeries first part of January I want to do 1 part at a time and be done by next summer... by my big 40th b-day and b lookin hot!
11/12/2009 170 lbs= 102lbs gone and 27 to go who would have thought it ... not me thats for sure!!! I feel so much better and have so much more energy!!! I love it, Richard has past me up by 8 lbs he has now lost 110 lbs to date.
05/11/2010 165lb
, I havent been on here in awhile do to drama of course and then we built our new building and was attempting to move when my best friend passed away from a massive heart attack noone seen it coming and it has really thrown me into a tailspin..I dont know how to handle it. I love him so much and I had not lost someone that I was so close to before.The hubby is pissed at me all the time and has taken all my pics that I had of Mark and destroyed them this alone is very upsetting tome.I dont understand how he can be so evil this was his best friend too... he was our best man in our wedding!!! and now he is just gone!! He was always there for us and me whenever Richard was gone I knew I could call Mark and he would be there come day or night! I miss seeing him everyday... he was at our shop everyday for the last 10 years so how do you not miss someone that had so much input in my life !???I m lost without him and I dont know what to do .... and all Richard and I do is fight all the time now.. I have had to call cops ect he has started puting his hands on me and I dont mean in a good way either!
He has some serious control issues! the weight loss is great but the other losses are not!
06/08/10 168lb, I keep bouncing between 165-170 , im so upset all the time I keep Richard pissed at me all the time , i miss mark so much ! I dont know how to get though this... my son just graduated 6/3 and he is fixin to leave for PA to go to school! Im gonna be so lost! I'll be 40 on 6/27 and not looking forward to it I have lost so much in that last few months along with major changes in my life over the last 3 yrs , im debating on going to see a therapist .Im going to make myself an appointment with another ps also maybe start some of my ps soon and that will make me feel better to get some of this hanging skin off me.I thought about starting with my arms and work my way to the full body lift!
Well Im gonna get off here, I m stuck at the same weight is it stress or me screwing up ...Im so good at screwing up!
Mark I love and miss you.9/2/10 Im weighing in at ....159-164 still having alot of stress in the life of course , its just so hectic all the time... Michael has been off at school for 3 months and yep Im lost without him and Mark. I want to see Mark so bad there is much I want to tell him and talking to a grave marker aint the same!I m pissed he left me here alone to deal with his best friend ya my husband that is not good! ya problems is a understatment and it has been for a long time. My seizures have started coming back and in my sleep .. I dont know which way to turn. Mark was who I always ran to for the last 3 years anyway , whats sad is it used to be Richard but that stopped the day he cheated on me. I have forgave him but I will never forget ! and I dont trust him at all .. I have heard that once the trust is gone so is the marriage??!! hmm maybe I should take my bff's advice and move on.I want to be with Mark whereever he is!
Well anyway thats about it I guess other then my lil girl is back in school 2nd grade this year and so far ishe is doing much better then last year so far so good!WE BOTH MISS MICHAEL AND MARK !
1-12-11 Well its been awhile sense Ive been on here... all hell has broke lose ! Richard c heated on me again in Oct-Nov.2010 with a bitch at a cefco gas station Named Tracie Lewis, less then a mile from our shop(business) Im so hurt ,all the weight loss has went to his head he cant handle the attention he's getting plus dealing with the lose of his friend stress from the shop ect....excuses excuses.. he started out telling me on Oct 24 he was talking to someone for the last couple weeks and it has went down hill from there I know I should leave him, he has been so mean and hateful and evil to me ,he has choked me to the point I almost passed out I have thrown things at him to the point he had to get stitches I mean it has just gotten so out of control and out of hand all we're doing is hurting each other! I love him so much but hate him for hurting me over and over again.I I have good days and bad today was bad I cant get all the stuff out of my head that he has said to me and done to me I dont know if I can get over it this time,yet I still love him ?How do you still love someone that was so ready to walk away from a 10 yr marraige and been together 12 yrs for someone he only knew a month and she knew he is married so what does that say about her?!!! How do I get this shit out of my head????I want to leave but Im afraid I wont make it on my own... I done it before but I was younger and didnt have so much invested ,we have a boat dealership together our daughter and so on GOD I need your help so bad!! I feel so lost ,I have noone to talk too about this shit! We are trying to work on our marriage but he doesnt want me to talk to him about what he done or bring it up so Im holding it all in , he did pay for me to get my tummy tuck and boob job done on 12/17/10, It seems to becoming a routine he cheats and I get a surgery , but this time it wasnt just a 1 night stand he continued to see her,he brought her to our home! and our business while I was taken off to the hospital for a siezure! He was with her! I know what I need to do but saying and doing it is so different and it is easier said then done! I hate myself for me so weak!! I wish I would just go to sleep and not wake up! I have lost so much and I dont just mean in the weight ,Im losing my husband... I thought if I became more attractive for him ,he wouldnt want to look else where,I went and saw a DR for my lack of interest in sex back in Sept, and she helped me my the end of sept.-Oct and so on the sex was great and he still went to another woman! So what now??Im 5 lbs from my goal I m currently 150lbs and that is great right!? I dont feel great.. Dr Stacie Hix was my dr that performed my tummy tuck ect she removed 15 lbs of excess skin from my stomach! Im going back in ,in Feb. or March to get my arms and legs done then I'll be done with all the plastic surgeries! but will it make my husband love me any more no! I have learned the hard way that even when I was saying I was doing all this for me,!all along I was doing it for him to try and make him love me and not stray ...Yeah I look hot or thats what Im told but I still feel like the fat ungly person that I was before this journay started and why did it start because he chaeted on me April 2007, Dec 2008 I had the VSG, He cheated Oct-Nov 2010 I got plastic surgery Dec 2010. he says he know he screwed up but then why do it again why hurt me so bad,that I dont know if I can make it though this...I made it though so much over the years and Im tired of fighting I just want to be happy and healthy is that so much to ask for ...Ive been beaten , rapped, left alone talked to like a dog actually worse then a adog over my 40 years so when does the shit stop?It is drama drama drama .i m sick of drama and Im sick of fighting and hurting I want it all to end! You know before you can get a WLS you have to see a phyic dr ,I dont think thats when you need to see 1! Its after the weight loss you need them. I had stopped smoking April 5 2008 ,Well after all the crap that happened with Richard(hubby) I started back smoking in Nov! I hate myself for being so weak I really do
.Anyway thats jsut some of the crap that has happened the last 3-4 months I hope 2011 is better then 2010 was and I pray God steps in soon cause I really need him now.
