Shame
Many of us, especially the slow losers, struggle with shame, guilt and fear of failure. You're not alone. I've lost 27 lbs in 2 months since surgery tomorrow, and every time the loss slows down or I see someone loosing faster, I feel fear and guilt and shame.
The first thing you can do for yourself is forgive yourself any mistakes you've made, start fresh in a new day, and just follow the advice you've gotten here. Be gentle with yourself from here on out if you can.
Summary of advice above plus mine:
Take a PPI (Pepcid or Prilosec OTC or similar). If you get grumblies during the day try one Tums and drink lots of liquids. It may not be hunger.
Ditch the protein bars. Premade shakes are not as bad, protein powders are even better. Check and compare brands - if you have a hard-core body-builder brand they're higher in calories.
Eat dense protein foods first, then a little veggie. Carry some beef jerky with you - it's high in sodium but it has 14 grams of protein per ounce and most brands are low in fat/calories.
Alchohol = calories and carbs and other unhelpful stuff. Not trying to be a prude but avoid or have rarely for now.
The general rules are:
64 oz minimum clear liquids (I shoot for 72 oz + a shake)
600-800 calories
80 grams of protein for guys
Less than 40 grams of carbs (I do
The first thing you can do for yourself is forgive yourself any mistakes you've made, start fresh in a new day, and just follow the advice you've gotten here. Be gentle with yourself from here on out if you can.
Summary of advice above plus mine:
Take a PPI (Pepcid or Prilosec OTC or similar). If you get grumblies during the day try one Tums and drink lots of liquids. It may not be hunger.
Ditch the protein bars. Premade shakes are not as bad, protein powders are even better. Check and compare brands - if you have a hard-core body-builder brand they're higher in calories.
Eat dense protein foods first, then a little veggie. Carry some beef jerky with you - it's high in sodium but it has 14 grams of protein per ounce and most brands are low in fat/calories.
Alchohol = calories and carbs and other unhelpful stuff. Not trying to be a prude but avoid or have rarely for now.
The general rules are:
64 oz minimum clear liquids (I shoot for 72 oz + a shake)
600-800 calories
80 grams of protein for guys
Less than 40 grams of carbs (I do
Highest weight: 335 lbs, BMI 50.9
Pre-op weight: 319 lbs, BMI 48.5
Current range: 140-144, BMI 21.3 - 22
175+ lbs lost, maintaining since February 2012
I think the above posters summed it up pretty well, but I just wanted to lend some support and say that I'm glad you were open and honest with your support team here at OH.
Lean on us whenever you need-- it really helps to know you've got friends in a similar boat and friends who can help to bail you out with support!
Lean on us whenever you need-- it really helps to know you've got friends in a similar boat and friends who can help to bail you out with support!
~~Emily~~
No, the doctors didn't lie to you, but they don't stress enough (or we choose not to hear) how much of the success depends on US, not the sleeve.
Ditch the alcohol. Not only is it empty calories, but it affects your metabolism long after it's out of your system. It's just not worth it while you're in your losing phase.
Definitely take your PPI/pepcid every day and make sure you're getting at least 8 glasses of liquid (non-alcoholic!) a day.
I'm with the other who say to ditch the protein bars. I haven't found one yet that isn't too high on carbs. High carbs = wanting more carbs.
Increase your protein intake in the am. This is advice from my PA who claims that you use more protein in the morning than any other time of the day. I do a two-stage breakfast. First, a protein coffee that gives me 20g of protein, then 30 to 60 minutes later, some dense protein...shrimp, salmon, beef, chicken. It keeps me full longer and it's really cut down on the evening munchies.
Not everyone loses their hunger. I haven't lost it, but I now have 3-4 hours before I start getting hungry and a much smaller meal totally satisfies me. A lot of this is a head game and you've got to figure out what works for you. Best of luck to you!
Ditch the alcohol. Not only is it empty calories, but it affects your metabolism long after it's out of your system. It's just not worth it while you're in your losing phase.
Definitely take your PPI/pepcid every day and make sure you're getting at least 8 glasses of liquid (non-alcoholic!) a day.
I'm with the other who say to ditch the protein bars. I haven't found one yet that isn't too high on carbs. High carbs = wanting more carbs.
Increase your protein intake in the am. This is advice from my PA who claims that you use more protein in the morning than any other time of the day. I do a two-stage breakfast. First, a protein coffee that gives me 20g of protein, then 30 to 60 minutes later, some dense protein...shrimp, salmon, beef, chicken. It keeps me full longer and it's really cut down on the evening munchies.
Not everyone loses their hunger. I haven't lost it, but I now have 3-4 hours before I start getting hungry and a much smaller meal totally satisfies me. A lot of this is a head game and you've got to figure out what works for you. Best of luck to you!
I still get hungry too, which is why I must have a PLAN and be ready to go with my plan at all times. Please look at my profile.. I have several recipes listed that are very filling and you can make a head of time like beef jerky and chicken salad.
Find some time to cook in bulk some of these recipes, and then bring them with you where ever you go. Eat every 3 hours on a schedule.. these recipes are very filling but also very low calorie... so you could conceivably eat every few hours and still stay very low calorie.. they are designed to use the most filling sleeve busting foods to keep you full and also provide great nutrition.. lean meats and fibrous veggies.
The sleeve only helps you eat smaller portions.. the rest (diet and exercise) is up to you. The mental part is the hardest.. you have to redefine your relationship with food, health and exercise. What is so important to you about alcohol and junk food? What do you truly value? Are those things really helping you? They might make you feel good for a short time, but later you have much more regret and shame and bad feelings.. not worth it!
We have to look at where we want to be, and the choices we make NOW effect our future selves. Is it really worth the momentary taste of any food or drink and the fleeting pleasure they give us, to look forward to a future of obesity and health issues and continued feelings of failure and shame?
Every time I think of eating something off plan I just remember that I might enjoy that item for 5 minutes or so, but then I will have days, weeks or even months of repercussions. The shame, the guilt, the weight gain, indigestion, etc. The cost is too great.. not worth those 5 mins of pleasure. The *want* goes away.. it's about controlling our momentary impulses.
We do this through recognizing and acknowledging that food is our weakness, and setting up strategies that keeps us safe from our own weaknesses (having food prepared and ready to go at all times).
When that weakness strikes, you'll be happy that you have a plan in place.. that appropriate food is just as easy to access as the bad food.
In fact you'll want to eat the good foods more because you've already prepared it.. you've already invested money and time in buying it, cooking it and having it with you.. it would be a shame to waste all you've invested to buy a donut.. see what I mean?
Hugs to you.. you can do this!
Find some time to cook in bulk some of these recipes, and then bring them with you where ever you go. Eat every 3 hours on a schedule.. these recipes are very filling but also very low calorie... so you could conceivably eat every few hours and still stay very low calorie.. they are designed to use the most filling sleeve busting foods to keep you full and also provide great nutrition.. lean meats and fibrous veggies.
The sleeve only helps you eat smaller portions.. the rest (diet and exercise) is up to you. The mental part is the hardest.. you have to redefine your relationship with food, health and exercise. What is so important to you about alcohol and junk food? What do you truly value? Are those things really helping you? They might make you feel good for a short time, but later you have much more regret and shame and bad feelings.. not worth it!
We have to look at where we want to be, and the choices we make NOW effect our future selves. Is it really worth the momentary taste of any food or drink and the fleeting pleasure they give us, to look forward to a future of obesity and health issues and continued feelings of failure and shame?
Every time I think of eating something off plan I just remember that I might enjoy that item for 5 minutes or so, but then I will have days, weeks or even months of repercussions. The shame, the guilt, the weight gain, indigestion, etc. The cost is too great.. not worth those 5 mins of pleasure. The *want* goes away.. it's about controlling our momentary impulses.
We do this through recognizing and acknowledging that food is our weakness, and setting up strategies that keeps us safe from our own weaknesses (having food prepared and ready to go at all times).
When that weakness strikes, you'll be happy that you have a plan in place.. that appropriate food is just as easy to access as the bad food.
In fact you'll want to eat the good foods more because you've already prepared it.. you've already invested money and time in buying it, cooking it and having it with you.. it would be a shame to waste all you've invested to buy a donut.. see what I mean?
Hugs to you.. you can do this!
Start weight: 388, Current Weight: 185, Goal Weight: 180, Weight Lost: 203 lbs
Certified Nutritionist ♥ VSG FAQ♥ sublimate: To elevate or uplift.
3/2012 Plastics: LBL, 3 Hernias Fixed, BL/BA, Rhinoplasty & Septum Fix. 6/2013 Plastics: Arm and thigh lift
Thank you all for your kind and somewhat corrective words. I am having a hard time of things right now. Work/life balance issues. I do take a PPI every day. I try to eat edamame for a high protein low fat snack, I drink the protidiet drinks which are 15 gms of protein but only 60-70 calories. My doc says if I don't want to lose all of my muscle I must eat the protein. That is my biggest struggle is finding foods that taste great, but low in calories and high in protein.
I just find myself being able to eat more than what they told me. I ate a wheat tortilla last night with a tablespoon of cream cheese and turkey pepperoni rolled up into a wrap, along with some potatoe chips (I know). then I wanted something sweet so I ate probably a cup to two cups of grapes. I am shocked at how much I can actually eat. It scares me. Even then I don't feel satisfied.
I guess the road to getting fat was a lonely one and now the road to health will also be one only I can travel. As far as the future goes, diabetes has wrecked my body and I thought I would feel so much better. Since I am still on diabetes meds, the doctor and nutrionist said to eat at least 20 grams per meal for a total of at least 100 grams of carbs per day. My sugar drops low if I don't and they say you need at least that amount to feed your brain so you can think properly.
I guess there are so many varied opinions and no one has lived 20 years beyond this surgery to be able to give solid advice. Good luck to everyone and I hope I didn't discourage any furture VSG candidates. Just make sure you are ready for a life change. Thanks again for all of your support.
I just find myself being able to eat more than what they told me. I ate a wheat tortilla last night with a tablespoon of cream cheese and turkey pepperoni rolled up into a wrap, along with some potatoe chips (I know). then I wanted something sweet so I ate probably a cup to two cups of grapes. I am shocked at how much I can actually eat. It scares me. Even then I don't feel satisfied.
I guess the road to getting fat was a lonely one and now the road to health will also be one only I can travel. As far as the future goes, diabetes has wrecked my body and I thought I would feel so much better. Since I am still on diabetes meds, the doctor and nutrionist said to eat at least 20 grams per meal for a total of at least 100 grams of carbs per day. My sugar drops low if I don't and they say you need at least that amount to feed your brain so you can think properly.
I guess there are so many varied opinions and no one has lived 20 years beyond this surgery to be able to give solid advice. Good luck to everyone and I hope I didn't discourage any furture VSG candidates. Just make sure you are ready for a life change. Thanks again for all of your support.
"I guess there are so many varied opinions and no one has lived 20 years beyond this surgery to be able to give solid advice."
Not true. Total and partial gastrectomies have been done for many decades, just not for weight loss. The sleeve is a partial gastrectomy. People live to ripe old age with little or none of their stomachs.
Not to argue with your doc, but your body doesn't need carbs in carb form to operate. The body will convert protein and fat into carbs. Cut down the refined carbs, like potato chips, and you'll feel better.
And try to get in more dense protein like steak, chicken, pork, beef. Shrimp is my favorite "go-to" food. High protein, low calorie. Eat 'em hot, eat 'em cold. Always have some on hand.
And don't try to eat until you feel full. Measure out 2.5-3 oz, eat it, and then stop worrying about food until your next planned meal or snack.
It's work and it's frustrating, but if you can get a plan that makes you successful, it'll start feeling like second nature. Keep the faith!
Not true. Total and partial gastrectomies have been done for many decades, just not for weight loss. The sleeve is a partial gastrectomy. People live to ripe old age with little or none of their stomachs.
Not to argue with your doc, but your body doesn't need carbs in carb form to operate. The body will convert protein and fat into carbs. Cut down the refined carbs, like potato chips, and you'll feel better.
And try to get in more dense protein like steak, chicken, pork, beef. Shrimp is my favorite "go-to" food. High protein, low calorie. Eat 'em hot, eat 'em cold. Always have some on hand.
And don't try to eat until you feel full. Measure out 2.5-3 oz, eat it, and then stop worrying about food until your next planned meal or snack.
It's work and it's frustrating, but if you can get a plan that makes you successful, it'll start feeling like second nature. Keep the faith!
YA GOT ANTS automatic negative thinking syndrome...
expectations are just premeditated disappointments
If at first you don't succeed.......... try SOMETHING DIFFERENT
Keep coming back....It works... if you work it....oh ****sorry wrong group!
"All that we are is a result of what we have thought." Buddha (563 BCE-483 BCE)
I didn't lose all hunger (head & REAL) till I was ~10 months out. WE are ALL DIFFERENT...
Too LATE TO TURN BACK NOW A .
How can YOU improve yer sit?
Have ya thought about a COMPLETE PROBIOTIC? Will absolutely help with gas bloat,digestion immunity blah blah blah ...ginger tea/root and licorice root will help with gas, bloat, acid.
Keep on top of yer PROTEIN SHAKES...(alkaline) will neutralize yer acidic tummy too!
PPI ain't workin...acidy stomach pain try a lil CAYENNE PEPPER in 4-6 oz. water!
Till them probiotics kick in!
Whats yer VITAMIN INTAKE LIKE?
Whats yer WATER INTAKE LIKE?
Pretty much thinkin about food non-stop...is a PHASE...I went through it...lots of people do...
I obsessed about food more than when I was FAT... goin thru the first few months!
IT CAN be F-N FRUSTRATING ....but you'll get this...Aaron..if YOU want.
ya gots a ways to go!! So HANG IN THERE and KEEP ON WORKING ON IT till YOU find what IS or IS NOT working for YOU!! !! DON'T GIVE UP
Hi Aaron,
Um, your only 2 1/2 months out and already look fantastic. Your obviously losing inches along with weight. I am a slow loser as well. Some of us are. I will give you some tips though. Firstly try as hard as you can not to eat until your hurting. It's entirely possible to stretch your sleeve. Your still new enough that it is all swelling that your feeling...however once that swelling goes down in about 3 months, your gonna be stretching your actual stomach. Secondly, keep within your calories...I eat between 1,300-1,600 a day. I also could eat more than everyone else after surgery and I also was still hungry. It takes a few months for the previously existing ghrelin from your stomach to leave your system, but it's always still there in your intestines. You will probably notice your hunger has decreased a few months after surgery. I obviously still get hungry though....just not the bear hunger. Deep breath. Your a newb dude...waaaaay to early to be giving yourself this much grief.
Blessings,
Jenny
Um, your only 2 1/2 months out and already look fantastic. Your obviously losing inches along with weight. I am a slow loser as well. Some of us are. I will give you some tips though. Firstly try as hard as you can not to eat until your hurting. It's entirely possible to stretch your sleeve. Your still new enough that it is all swelling that your feeling...however once that swelling goes down in about 3 months, your gonna be stretching your actual stomach. Secondly, keep within your calories...I eat between 1,300-1,600 a day. I also could eat more than everyone else after surgery and I also was still hungry. It takes a few months for the previously existing ghrelin from your stomach to leave your system, but it's always still there in your intestines. You will probably notice your hunger has decreased a few months after surgery. I obviously still get hungry though....just not the bear hunger. Deep breath. Your a newb dude...waaaaay to early to be giving yourself this much grief.
Blessings,
Jenny
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