My Father passed away and I am at fault

How can I start I had a very bad accident  on 06/15 I rolled about 5 times, the van was a total loss. My father came to see me to the hospital and about 5 hours later he DIED And I think it was my fault I broke his heart with that shock he got. Now I feel that when my sisters look at me they dont have to say nothing because their eyes tell me everything. I am so sad and depressed.

How sad for you! I'm sure it was a shock for your father to see you hurt in the hospital, but I don't believe that alone could kill someone. Even if it was a contributing factor to his death, it's not like you rolled the van over on purpose. This is not something you DID, it's something that HAPPENED to you. I'm sure it won't help with you saddness over your loss, but give yourself a break. You didn't DO this.

Connie

You are very, very sad about losing your father, and so are your sisters.  BUT -- listen closely, and believe what I say -- you are not responsible for this.  It's even scarier to realize -- we do not have this much power over life and death.  You need to pray, support your sisters, and heal yourself from your accident - your father would not want you to take on that burden of guilt. Get some therapy or grief counseling  -- it will really help. --Sarah 

I 100% agree. Great reply.

first of all let me give you my deepest condolences for the loss of your Dad. I am sorry for your loss. I do not understand how you feel that his passing is your fault? Because he came to see you and was shocked by what he saw? As far as your sisters I don't think that if it really is them blaming you for Dad's passing that is so wrong.  It not like you work up that day and said Oh today is the day I will have an accident and all of that. If that is the case that your sisters blame you that is pretty messed up and they need to see counseling not you. I am really sorry that you feel that way and my thoughts are with you.

Oh my goodness! I hope you are ok. Of course it is not your fault. Both my parents died in my home and I thought it was somehow my fault. I had guilt for a long time and I don't even know why. Try to get some counseling if you truly believe what you are saying. Did your dad have a heart attack? Was he ill before this? You need to take everything into account. This accident was not your fault, it was an accident, and you are not responsible for your dad's death. It is terribly sad, I certainly can understand that. You need support of your family and friends right now to get you through this tragic time. God bless.

Nancy

I am so sorry you are feeling this way.  Not to get too personal but did they do an autopsy to find out what his cause of death was?  Maybe that will help you to make you not think this was your fault.  Please don't blame yourself for this.  Only GOD knows when its your time to go.  I hope you feel better about this soon.
Jacque

Please, please don't do  this to yourself.  You are not the cause of your father's death!  Nobody has that kind of power!.What you see in your sisters eyes isn't blame for your father.  It's the fear, shock, and sadness that they almost lost BOTH of you.
May I make a suggestion?  See if you can talk to a mental health person to help you through this grief that you are dealing with.

I don't think you can blame yourself.  He was doing what he wanted to do when he died, and had he been somewhere else, doing something else, you would not have had that time with him.  What a gift to have the comfort of a father when you needed him.  I believe that when its our time, its our time, and we don't influence that, it comes from the Father who is in heaven. 

Naturally you are sad and depressed, and I wish I could lift that burden from you.  I remember when my father died, and it was hard, really, really hard.  I will pray for you not to blame yourself, and to remember your dad with joy when you think of him.  Blessings to you.

When there is a death in the family I think it's normal to place blame on someone and I think it's also normal to feel you are at fault.  I lost my own father about 6 months ago and my step-son was murdered about 4 years ago.  Don't take your sisters' grief-stricken words or looks personally.  Tragedy can bring out the worst in people.  Give it time.  And be assured you are not to blame, no matter what they may say.  I wish you a speedy recovery and my sympathies for your loss.  You have a lot to deal with, emotionally as well as physically.  Tell you sisters you need their support as you recover.  Hopefully you can come together as a family as you work through this together.