Bama, sorry to hear about what happened  to your friend.  Very tought to deal with no matter how someone tries to serve it up.  The only thing we can do is pray for his family and know that he is in a better place where someones weight just doesn't matter anymore.  

Take care my friend, again, I am sorry for your loss.  I know you have a personal tie to the situation, but you did not cause this to happen.

Be good, TazRN   

It is awesome isn't it.  Those pounds will just keep melting off if you stick to the program.  I can't say that enough.  Do your walking and exercising and you will lose it twice as fast as others that have had the same surgery.  I am to this day blown away by the people who don't have success and 9 out of 10 times it is because they are sabotaging themselves by eating the worng things or not exercising - most will say they can't exercise because of ailments like their knees hurt or their back hurts, but they could do something like swimming instead.  Lots of people will make up excuses for why they can't do something instead of coming up with solutions on how to do something else instead.

Congrats, TazRN 

Being 4 months out, you are definitely ready to move into the weights.  Keep doing the cardio, but change it up - do high intensity mixed with the low intensity.  With the weights, do the same thing - trust me on this, you will never get back to the big bulky days of lifting weights.  At one time I was benching 550, squating 850, and dead lifting 800 pounds.  I was quite the hoss back in the day between football and wrestling I looked like a tank.  Then I got marriend, had kids, got lazy, got fat, and then the weight piled on like cazy.  I've lost a ton of weight now (160 pounds) and weigh about 220.  I just can't muster up the strength like I used to.  I am about 14 months out of surgery now and feel I have great conditioning cardio wise and I have great muscle tone now, but the big bulky throw around muscle is no more.  I just can't take in the necessary carbs and protein to push my body like that anymore.  Even if your worry was bulk, just do high reps and you will get the same affect as cardio, but with weights instead.

And you are right - you are the only one who will truly know what your body needs.  From experience, I will say that the people who tend to do better weightloss wise, tend to do both cardio and weight training - they go hand in hand.  

Taz

Now that is some funny ass **** right there now.

Laughed my arse off on that one.

Taz

Awesome job Bama.  Your "skinny arse" is certainly a role model for the guys on the board, as well as myself.  Keep up the great job you are doing.

Be good my friend.

Taz 

Thank you sir for the kind words of encouragement.  Long time no speak my friend.  I see you are still kicking butt and losing weight.  You make me look like a heavyweight now compared to you.

Be good Bama, Taz

Good luck and welcome to your new life my friend.

TazRn

You will never find the exact answer you are looking for.  There are just too many variables to factor in when you look at things like body composition, age, height, race, sex, genetics, exercise, etc. - you get my drift.  You can't go by the charts that insurance companies use because they are antiquated relics that should be abolished - somehow we are all still defined by these criminally insane charts - not fair, but that is the reality.

I'm 5'7" and now weigh 220 pounds, solid as a rock all over with veins popping out everywhere, 1XL shirts, 36 waist  - I started out at 367 pounds and a 56 waist 12 months ago.  My surgeon says I am at the perfect weight for my body type.  Say What?  Yes, that is what I said also!!!  If you look at those charts - it says I should weigh about 158-160.  No way, no how - I would be on deaths doorstep or six feet under - per my doctor.   I always had a personal goal of 200, but now as time has progressed onward, I realize I may never get there - and that is okay.  My surgeon never discussed goal weights because they are not realistic - as he put it to me almost a year ago when I started my weightloss journey - "why put that pressure/expectation on yourself - it is only a number".  He says more patients come up with that "Goal Weight crap" than the surgeons do.  As he puts it, people get these goal weight ideas from the "weightloss web sites and forums" - we actually help perpetuate this problem.  Even though he told me this, I still put a goal weight on myself initially.  It was only recently in the last month and a half that I have given up on this pipe dream.  For me, it is now all about how I feel mentally.  It is more about how my clothes fit, what my lab work looks like, and how I look in the mirror.  I could care less about the scale number now.  I have actually put weight on, but it is good weight gain from muscle mass and not bad weight gain from fat storage deposits.   

Always remember this if nothing else, your weight is not ever going to be defined by a number ( you may want it to be and that may be the expectation of others - very hard for people to get past this point - it was for me).  Try to define yourself by how you feel mentally and how your clothes fit.  If you can do those two things, the number just won't matter or have as much meaning anymore.     

TazRN

That is awesome my brother.  I am very proud of what you have accomplished.  I am having some of the same experiences/rewards you are talking about with working out, exercise, running, etc.;  You are definitely going to be inspirational for many guys on the forum.  I was really taken back when you mentioned your wife and how she puts up with the extra workouts all week long and then taking care of the kids also.  I am in the same boat and can sympathize with you quite easily on the workout issues.  My wife is always ribbing/elbowing me about how I am now married to the gym and not her anymore (she is being sarcastic as hell, but she really means it - I love her dearly for putting up with me). 

Keep up the great work.

TazRn

Trust me, being a post operative recovery room nurse, I have seen it all on men and females.  The medical people who will be caring for you don't even see it or care about it (no matter how big or small your piece of equipment is - this is a big mental hang up for many people - you are not the first person to have these feelings of apprehensiveness).  The catheter itself is usually removed once anethesia wears off and you are up moving around.  Trust me on this, you only want to get one of these.  You will be a sleep for the one they put in during surgery.  Once you are awake you will want the catherter you currently have in to be taken out - don't rush this process because if you have any problems going to the bathroom once it comes out, they will certainly put another one in, which means big time exposure of your equipment so another one can be reinserted - not the most comfortable thing to have done because you are fully awake and aware that the tube is going where no tube should be going, not to mention the akwardness of have your penis manhandled - whether it be by a woman or a man.      

On a more positive note, once you start losing weight, you will actually feel like your penis is getting bigger/longer (30 pounds lost equals roughly a gain of one inch in length - thats what many people say here on the boards, but I think it is more like for every 60-75 pounds lost equals 1 inch gained - that is what happended to me and I feel like a champ/stud - whoo hoo - lost 150 pounds and gained 2.5 inches).  Most of us have had extra skin/fat covering up what we had down below = this gives the appearance of having small equipment.

Don't sweat the surgery worrying about the catheter.  Look at the bigger picture and know that bigger and better things are on the horizon for your life.  It will work out fine.

Good Luck, Taz

I am curious for those of you who have been post-op for a year or more.  Do you find yourself eating foods now that you would have thought of as totally off-limits as a new post-op patient when you were say 2-3 months out from surgery.  I am basically stating that you are now all healed up from surgery and you are way out from that 6 week post-op diet with all of the shakes, soft foods, etc.

Now that I am basically 1 year post-op (2/28/2008), I find myself living and eating in a completely normal way.  I can no longer eat gigantic meals as the "old fat me" used to do.  But, I do find myself eating meals that my family enjoys whether we are at home or out for dinner.  Nothing is really off limits to me.  I feel so great and I feel truly normal now.  It is almost liberating to eat a meal of whatever I want.  I always try to eat protein first and foremost and then if I feel I have the room for other stuff, I might eat part of baked potato or some bread, occasionally a sweet treat, but never like I did before.  My weight loss has remained steady (150 pounds total), but now as far as what I attribute that to - it could be all the exercise I do daily = 1.5 hours total time = 2.5 miles of running for 30 minutes and 60 minutes of weightlifting or it could be I now eat 5-6 very small meals per day = increased metabolism. 

I am asking this question because I look and see how people are eating these meals encompassing very low calories (800-1000), now I know this might be acceptable as a fresh post-op patient, but for someone far out, say 8 months to a couple of years, I would think 1300-2000 calories would be acceptable - if you have the activity level to compensate for the increased caloric intake.  

I would really love to know how much some of you now eat daily in terms of calories, number of meals, do you ever splurge and eat "No No Foods - things that would have been unheard of as a fresh post-op patient?  Do you personally feel in control of your eating habits now versus long ago?  Can you now eat and not feel guilty about what you put in your mouth?  Have new eating habits become second nature now where you don't think about each and every morsel of food that you put in your mouth?

Me personally - I eat between 1500-2000 calories daily, of which I burn off about 600-800 calories from working out, except for Sundays - no exercise that day, rest only.  Within that last month I definitely feel a new found sense of calm and tranquility.  I no longer feel the need to watch every piece of food I put in my mouth.  I no longer feel the need to weigh myself every single day - I was really bad about this early on, I wouldn't even put food or drink in my mouth till I had worked out in the gym and then weighed myself to get the lowest recorded weight possible.  

Sorry to be so long, but I felt like I need to say my thoughts.

Thanks, Taz 

 

I just finished having my Tummy Tuck on 12/23/2008 and I had no problems with insurance paying for everything.  I was approved first go around without any hassle.  They took a lot of pictures with me standing sideway to show the pannus and they also took some forward shots to show it from the front.  The doctor was on my side the whole time and I really believe it is how the doctors write it up from the get go.  He made it a point to tell me that because of the gastric bypass being done, he didn't think it would be a problem getting insurance approval.  I am probably not the typical person to compare plastics with though.  I have read where many people have trouble getting their insurance to pay for this.  It is hard enough getting the ins. to pay for bypass surgery much less plastics.  I will tell you though, it will be worth every penny if you have to pay for it out of your own pocket.  I now have the stomach of a 21 year old stud.  It has done nothing but enhace my self-esteem and body image.  Totally awesome.  I would do it again in a skinny minute.  It is amazing what a skilled plastics surgeon can do in about 2.5 hours time.

Taz

That is a great point sjbob.  I do find myself at that point where I do eyeball my amounts rather than actually weigh them, like in the beginning stages as a fresh postop.  I am now 11 months out from having had RNY surgery and I do find it much easier now to pick and chose my foods, as well as the amounts I eat.  I am constantly on the defensive though in my mind because I feel like I have to remind myself of what I can and cannot have - in terms of quantity - I really feel like I have a great handle on sizes and amounts, but it is a constant variable (choir) that I must factor into my daily life each and everyday.  Part of me wonders if this is how I will be for the rest of my life????????  It really is a scary time now because I feel great with my weight and more importantly, I love how I look and feel physically/mentally.  Being this way really makes it easy to get complacent and take things for granted.  I know my pouch will only let me hold so much, but like you stated, it is no where near as tight as it was the first few weeks postop.  I do weigh myself regularly and that helps me to know I am on the right track and doing things like I should.  Every morning I wake up and realize how great life is and that I never want to go back to the old me.  It really is a checks and balances system that I guess we will have to deal with forever.  I am guessing that when we allow ourselves to get complacent as I stated, that is when we will see regain and old habits start to resurface = those are the things that got many of us into trouble in the first place.   

It never ceases to amaze me how someone will post an intuitive thought and it really makes one question/think about where they stand in their weightloss journey.  That is why I love this site.  It is one of the tools I use almost daily to help me not get complacent. 

sjbob, thanks for this post and helping me to take a moment to stop and look at where I am on my journey.

Taz