no support at home and all my baggy cloths...

Mar 25, 2011

well today my weight is 168.8 and i whould be way more happier if my maine support other than my blog and my youtube page wasnt such a asssss. urgh it seems he is more and more unhappy the more happy and confindent i become. i recently started back at school just to go for my a medical assistant diploma and that also is making me very happy along with my weight loss but man he seems to be dogging on me like crazy. everything im doing for me this time seems to be a bother to him and not wanting to be supporive when i even discuss anything that is good in my life. now me asking him to do he simplest thing is like too much where as before he did not mind. everytime i try and talk to him seems like it just annying him. the only time he doesnt seem bothered by me is when we have sex.  We havent spent mch time because i work double weekens and school in the eves 4 days a week i just wanted 30 min to kick it and talk and all e could seem to think about is groping me. but what ever i think i have no support  in my enviroment.. anyways my cloths are getting to be really baggy, i havent tried to put on any smaller cloths because  think im just scared of not being smaller.. i look in the mirror and see the same person at 208.8 not 168. 8 a 40 pound diff. i still wear my sweats n tees. to look down on the cloths youre wearing it feels the same but when i look in the mirror im like omg it is sooo big. ive been really emotional and i asked the doc abot it he didnt seem worried i think really it is my lack of support  around me it seems i get more support and respect from people at my school or work.  and none from the home front. and i makes me feel really lonley and sad....

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