Just Joining...

Jan 24, 2011

My sister is the one that suggested this site to me after talking to a co-worker who is also going to be having bariatric surgery - I am so glad she did.  I was looking through goals and was so surprised at how many people feel the same way I do about shopping at Lane Bryant (Lane Giant), wanting to buy more than just "smelly stuff" at Victoria's Secret and just wanting to be able to LOVE themselves. 

When I first decided to do this surgery, I bought a book written by a woman who had "journaled" her story - I am sorry but it seemed like a lot of fluff to me.  I mean, she decided to meet with the doctor and "poof" her surgery was scheduled... nothing about 6 months of medically supervised weight loss, psych tests and appointments, medical tests, etc.  She made it sound like she walked in and scheduled her surgery and just like that, she was skinny.  I guess I am looking for more reality then that.  I know this is going to be harder than I think, but I don't care.  I want it and I want it BAD.  But along with the journey, I want honesty.

I did my MMPI last week.  Argh.  I cannot believe the questions!  I sat there wondering if people answer "true" to some of them... It was long and I am so scared to hear the results.  I feel like my whole being is being analyzed and judged.  When I first met with the psychologist I left feeling like I had been stripped naked and made to stand in front of an audience.  I know that's not really HOW it is but the doc was so impersonal and firing questions at me left and right and asking, "are you SURE?" when I would answer.  I have the next appointment on February 2 and I so hope he says, "Yup, you're normal, carry on".

Anyway, I am glad I joined this site.  It sucks to have fears and it sucks to shop at Lane Bryant, but its nice to know there are people out there that are feeling the same way and are willing to be supportive.  It makes the long road look a little shorter and not quite so bumpy.  :)

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