Trapped in a Big Girl Body...Ready to Go!

Jun 28, 2011

Scared to death yesterday that I would have had to postpone my surgery. My incision from my right armpit surgery has become infected. Dr Averbach confirmed that I can still have my surgery as scheduled as long as I continue my antibiotics. People really have a misconception of why people have weight loss surgery. In my case, I want to do the simpliest of a thing...sweat. My disease has trapped me in my body far too long.

Completed my PreOp and Nutrition classes, documentation, physical, blood work and paid my hospital copay.  All that's left is the FMLA paperwork from the surgeon to get approved for the time off work. I am finally getting excited about the surgery.

MINDSET... At my PreOp class and throughout the 6 month approval process everyone has talked about mindset. "Prepare your mind for the you that you are about to become." As I look back at this obese version of myself, I realize that I have had a size 9/10 mindset all along. When I looked in the mirror and lived my life, I operated as a smaller person. The clothes I like, the way I danced and exercised would amaze others but never me. I am often offended when someone mentioned that I was a "Big Girl" because in my heart I was really a 9/10. But the truth is really an eye opener.  Comments like...Your pretty for a Big Girl. You can dance for a Big Girl. You can dress for a Big Girl. You are so happy and fun for a Big Girl. You are so shapely for a Big Girl. Things like me picking out clothes for others that are smaller in a way like they were my life sized barbies. All lead me to believe...I am a 9/10 trapped in a "Big Girl" body. Cant wait to until she is unleash from the chains of her obesity. 

Thank you Jesus for sending a message through Lady today... Just wait til next year!

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