Lady Chi
long time, eh?
Feb 13, 2010
wow! well, i never thought i would be away from this page for so long. although i always come online to see the success of others, i have not logged into my profile. what's been happening? LIFE! i've been busy with work ... changed jobs, my father passed away last year and that was difficult, especially with the back-and-forth to chicago until he passed.i am almost 3 years post-op and i have lost ~120 lbs. i met my goal, but would like to lose about 10 lbs more, max. my mother tells me that i am too old to be trying to be as thin as i used to be. ahahahahahaha ... you're never too old to be thin. yes, bone-thin is not attractive, but thin is cool!
i will be having a body lift in 2 weeks as my thighs and butt are a scary thought and only i am allowed to behold them unclothed. in fact, i always tell people that i have 2 sharpeis - Buffy and Pinky - i am referring to my thighs! LOL
about 1 month post surgery, i had emergency surgery unrelated to GBP. the weight loss i had achieved at that time had allowed for a football-sized uterine fibroid to fall through and was just hanging by a stalk. i waited 3 days in discomfort (unfortunately, i have a very high pain tolerance which precedes me from acting on pain quickly) before i went to the hospital -- self-medicating and thinking the pain would go away. i even drove myself to the hospital 50 miles away (at the time i was thinking it was GBP related so i was going to see my surgeon) with all the windows open, heart palpitating wildly. by the time i arrived at the hospital, it took about 15 mins to get out of the car and by that time, i could no longer stand straight as now i WAS in pain (level 10 pain for me, is like level 20+ for many people). even the attending physician on call that night chastised me about allowing myself to endure all that pain. i was given a CT scan to find out the problem.
so, this then led to another complication, again, unrelated to GBP. due to the pain i subjected myself to, and the fibroid hanging and cutting off circulation, i developed 3 DVTs between my left and right leg and a PE in my lung. i could have died. they suspected i had a clot, but because i was not able to lay flat for the CT scan, it was not as clear as it could have been and even the ultrasound of my legs came back negative. miraculously, i lived 3 weeks in this condition and it was only diagnosed when i went in for my check-up for the fibroid surgery. i had another CT scan when i complained of discomfort on the left side of my chest (again, see, i call it discomfort as opposed to pain). i was not predisposed to clots, but due to the number that i had developed, the doctors thought i would be on meds more than 1 year. to everyone's amazement, including my own, i was only on meds 4 months. the clots had dissolved!!! the body and mind are truly amazing!!! don't ever forget that! we can heal ourselves if we believe!
so, i am doing well. the GBP did not change my life. yes, there were the wonderful little things like crossing my legs without losing circulation, walking short - medium-length distances without being out of breath, and i was very happy on the plane, sitting in coach with room to spare in my seat! i love traveling and will do more and more. i am treating myself to Greece at the end of summer, if the Greek economy does not fall. otherwise, i will go someplace else nice.
otherwise, my life was pretty much where it was before GBP in terms of i still did not have good self-esteem, etc. i did not have men falling all over me after i lost weight because i still had a wall stronghold up all around me. i did not have belief in myself. i did not feel i was deserving. yes, i make good money (no worries about money) and have a solid career, but i have a 'safe' career and not truly doing what i want with my life. please remember whatever issue(s) you had that you allowed in your life that enabled your weight gain will still be there (and more) when you lose the weight. many people who are honest will mention this is their posts.
i used to have the perfect body before i gained weight. but because i did not think highly of myself back then and did not truly have love for myself, it manifested itself in my weight gain, bad relationships, one-sided friendships, and financial upheaval. now i am dealing with all the loose skin as your body does not like yo-yo weight fluctuations and eventually the skin will not snap back to the way it was before the weight gain.
it is really important to know who we are and to give ourselves accolades every day. we must appreciate who we are and develop the life we intend and deserve. don't let people, whether it is your family, religion, friends, government tell you who you are. when we do this, we live a life not our own. if you have children, try your best to be encouraging and use positive words with them even in the bad times as those words will build children who are strong and sure of themselves. we need to tell ourselves and our children that we love us/them. even if you don't say bad things to yourself or your children, the absence of encouraging and loving words can still have the effect of saying bad things.
well, i am off my soap box! :~) i love me and each day i am getting better. my life is now changing for the better. i am creating the life i deserve. i don't know when i will post again, but i am proud of all of your achievements! keep up the wonderful work with your tool and other areas of your life!
best,
nette
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About Me
Southern, CA
Location
42.3
BMI
Surgery
07/05/2007
Surgery Date
Apr 26, 2006
Member Since
