samanthamaykipps
Nervous about surgery!!
Jan 06, 2011
My surgery is in like 3 days on January 10th and I'm starting to get a little nervous. All of the fears about things going wrong seem to be running through my mind and driving me crazy. I'm pretty nervous about being under anethesia and waking up from it with bad side effects or something. Or maybe not waking up at all. I keep worrying about developing a leak or hemmoraging or just about anything bad that can go wrong with the surgery. I know it's all in my head and its a safe surgery for the most part, but dang! However, I know that no matter what it will all be worth it once its done.. I can't even imagine what it will feel like to shop for clothes in regular stores without having to shop the plus size section. Heck. It will be nice to just be able to wear cute, girly clothes. It's so hard to find clothes that aren't disgusting when your fat.. And I wonder what it will be like to not feel like everyone is staring at me when I walk into a room because I'm the biggest person there.. or just feel like maybe someone is looking at me because they like the way I look instead of me automatically assuming they are grossed out by my appearance. I honestly can't wait to experience these things! I hope this surgery turns out to be the tool I need to lose weight and completely change my life..
