Death...

Jun 26, 2010

People say the only thing you can be sure of is death and taxes...Well i guess it is death that I am trying to avoid. In a few days, I will start my WLS journey.  Why do I feel so alone?  My wife, my friends, my Facebook all tell me I am gonna be just fine. That may or may not be the case. It seems like nobody here is going thru this but me I am the first in my circle to have it done. All this to stay healthy? Is it worth it? I know I am searching for a new life but all I see is ...Death per say, Death...to what I eat, how I eat, when I eat. Death...to the part of my stomach that will no longer be with me ...Death to the small bowel that no longer gets nurishment. It is hard for me to focus now...on anything. That is why I write here ...I feel at home here. People here have gone and went to the otherside with great results. I must find resolve for my feelings and go thru the door to a better and heathier me. In 5 days I die...the old Michael that is...to be reborn as the real me. The me that lays beneath the surface, the one everyone likes, the one I want to be ... Or do I??? I am scared, nay terrified of what is beyond because I can't see it. People will tell me, " Yea, it is the best thing I have ever did!" , but I will need to experience myself the reclimation of life.  So Heres to life!!

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