Gaining Control - Happy New Year to Me

Jan 04, 2010

Well - Since it's a new year and I'll be 36 in a couple of days - I figured it's about time I become grown up enough to finally take control over my life. I know - New Years resolutions aside - I mean it. I decided a couple of things over my holiday break - and my self confidence and ability to be the best person I can be - are going to have to be looked in to pretty thoroughly.
My mom and I don't get along. She's crazy - and I have to realize that I can't control what she does any more. I can only control how much I have her in my life and how her crazy effects me. So - since she's moving this weekend, after it's all said and done - she'll become this random insane person that I occassionally have contact with - but otherwise, she's dead to me. I told my hubby this over the weekend and of course, he gets this look in his eyes like I have lost my own mind - and I quickly add that I don't want to KILL the woman - just to pretend that for all intensive purposes, she's dead - so I can break ties and move on with my life.
Step 2 will be going to a psychiatrist to get my head in order
Step 3 is going to be working out and trying to get healthy.
So I had gastric bypass done in 2003 - and 6 years post surgery, I'm still a carb fiend who grazes all day long and doesn't exercise. I've GOT to stop that or else I am just going to continue to gain back the weight. I've put on 40 pounds. Having 3 kids is no excuse.
Day one - I need to learn to love me. I am worth it. Despite what the crazy old lady in my life says.

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