It's been almost 10 years

Oct 17, 2011

I STARTED MY JOURNEY IN JULY OF 2001. I WENT TO VISIT MY REGULAR DOCTOR FOR A REASON THAT I CAN'T REMEMBER AND OF CORSE BEFORE SHE SEES YOU THE NURSE TAKES YOUR WEIGHT, TEMPERATURE AND PREASSURE. WELL WHEN MY DOCTOR WALKED INTO THE ROOM WITH MY CHART IN HER HAD THE FIRST THING THAT CAME OUT OF HER MOUTH WAS, "WELL WANDA, YOU KNOW YOU ARE 100 LBS OVER WEIGHT NOW". IT BLEW ME AWAY. I DIDN'T GO THERE TO HEAR THAT. I WENT THERE BECAUSE I WAS HAVING HEADACHES OR TROUBLE WITH MY BACK OR SOMETHING. WHATEVER IT WAS I CAN'T REMEMBER. ALL I REMEMBER IS YOU ARE 100LBS OVERWEIGHT. I THINK THE 100LBS STUCK IN MY HEAD BECAUSE 4 YEARS PRIOR AND 70LBS AGO I ASKED THIS SAME DOCTOR ABOUT A MORE PERMANANT WAY TO KEEP WEIGHT OFF AND SHE PUT ME ON THAT PHENTERAMINE (I KNOW I DIDN'T SPELL THAT RIGHT)AND TOLD ME THAT SHE DIDN'T THINK I WOULD EVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT ANY DRASTIC MEASURES BECAUSE I WAS SO FAR AWAY FROM BEING 100LBS OVERWEIGHT. I SURE FOOLED HER DIDNT'T I? WHEN I LEFT HER OFFICE, IN THE BACK OF MY MIND I REMEMBERED SEEING SOMETHING SOMEWHERE ABOUT SURGERY FOR PEOPLE WHO WERE 100LBS OVERWEIGHT. THE FIRST THING I DID WAS GO TO THE BARIACTRIC BOARD TO FIND ANY SURGEONS IN MARYLAND AND MADE AN APPOINTMENT WITH ALL OF THEM AND NOW AFTER MEETING WITH ALL OF THEM AND GOING TO THE MEETING THAT SOME OF THE HAVE I HAVE NARROWED MY CHOICES AND HAVE DECIDED TO GO AHEAD WITH DR. VANGURI. WHEEWWWWW!!!

THE FIRST TIME I CALLED DR. VANGURI'S OFFICE WAS IN JULY 2001. I WAS TOLD AT THAT TIME THAT I COULD NOT GET AN APPOINTMENT TO SEE HIM UNTIL OCTOBER 3, 2001, BUT I WAS WELCOMED TO ATTEND HIS GROUP MEETING ON AUGUST 19, 2001 AT FRANKLIN SQUARE SO I DID. BECAUSE HIS LAST NAME BEGAN WITH "V" HE WAS THE LAST DOCTOR ON MY LIST TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT WITH SO BY THE TIME I WENT TO HIS GROUP MEETING I FELT LIKE I WAS HEARING THING FOR THE 100TH TIME AND WAS VERY BORED, BUT HE STILL MADE AN IMPRESSION ON ME. I LIKED HIS PERSONALITY AND HIS DEMEANOR AND AFTER MEETING WITH HIM IN HIS OFFICE ON OCTOBER 3, 2001 I DECIDED THE HE WAS THE ONE FOR ME. MY NEXT APPOINTMENT WAS MADE FOR NOVEMBER 14, 2001 FOR A PHYSICAL. THERE WASN'T MUCH TO IT, I THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO AT LEAST TAKE SOME OR BUT THEY DIDN'T.

NOV 20, 2001

DR. VANGURI SENT MY AUTHORIZATION REQUEST TO MY INSURANCE COMPANY TODAY. AFTER READING IT, I THOUGHT THAT IT WAS TOO VAGUE AND TYPED UP MY OWN REQUEST AND FAXED IT TO A REPRESENTATIVE ALONG WITH THE DOCTOR'S SO THAT THEY COULD PRESENT IT TO THE MEDICAL REVIEW BOARD. NOW IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE WAITING GAME.

DEC 7, 2001

TODAY, AT THE INSTRUCTION OF A BLUE CROSS/BLUE SHIELD REPRESENTATIVE, I CALLED TO GET THE STATUS OF MY REQUEST FOR SURGERY APPROVAL. I WAS INFORMED THAT A LETTER WAS PUT IN THE MAIL FOR ME TODAY, BUT THEY COULDN'T TELL ME WHAT IT SAID. I HOPE THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT I AM DENIED.

DEC 13, 2001

I'M APPROVED!MY SURGERY DATE IS SET FOR MONDAY, MAY 6, 2002.

DEC 14, 2001

SINCE THE THOUGH FIRST ENTEREND MY MIND TO HAVE THIS SURGERY I HAVE BEEN VERY EXCITED AND HAVE FELT LIKE I COULDN'T WAIT TO HAVE IT DONE. NOW SUDDENLY SINCE MY APPROVAL YESTERDAY AND MY DOCTOR CALLED ME TODAY TO SET UP SOME PRE OP APPOINTMENTS I AM FEELING VERY APREHENSIVE AND DOUBTFUL, BUT I'M SURE IT IS A FASE THAT WILL PASS.

DEC 14, 2001

I DECIDED TO START RESEARCHING THE BAD THINGS ABOUT THIS SURGERY TO SEE IF I STILL REALLY WANTED IT. I WENT TO THE MEMORIAL PAGE ON THIS SITE AND READ EVERY ONE. IT SURE DID HELP ME SEE THINGS IN A NEW LIGHT. I THOUGHT THAT AFTER READING THESE PAGES IT WOULD HELP ME CHANGE MY MIND ABOUT HAVING THE SURGERY DONE, BUT IT HAS NOT. I STILL WANT TO DO IT! WHILE SOME PEOPLE HAVE DIED DIRECTLY DUE TO SURGERY, MANY MORE PEOPLE HAVE DIED DUE TO COMPLICATION AND PROBLEMS THAT THEY ALREADY HAD BEFORE THE SURGERY. I AM A 27YEAR OLD SINGLE MOTHER OF TWO PRECIOUS BABIES AND I WANT TO ALL OF THE THINGS WITH THEM THAT ANY OTHER MOTHER WANTS TO. SINCE I HAVE HAD MY CHILDREN, WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR, I DON'T LOOK LIKE I FEEL. I AM FULL OF ENERY AND WANT TO DO SO MANY THINGS, BUT MY WEIGHT IS HOLDING ME DOWN. I CAN'T WAIT TO CHASE MY KIDS WITHOUT GETTING OUT OF BREATH OR SWIM FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR WITHOUT FEELING LIKE I'M DYING, AND I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BUYING THESE BIG @$$ CLOTHES. IT IS SO HARD TRYING TO FIND CLOTHES THAT LAY JUST RIGHT SO THAT I LOOK JUST FAT INSTEAD OF SEVEN MONTHS PREGNANT. NOT A DAY HAS GONE BY IN THE LAST YEAR WHEN AT LEAST ONE PERSON HASN'T THOUGHT THAT I WAS HAVING A BABY. WHEN I'M WITH OTHER PEOPLE THEY GET MAD AT THE PERSON WHO MADE THE MISTAKE AND SAY THEY WERE RUDE, BUT I DON'T GET MAD AT THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE RIGHT. MY STOMACH IS HUGE. I CAN'T WAIT TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE.

DEC 18, 2001

TODAY I RECIEVED A PACKAGE FROM MY DOCTOR AND BOY IS IT OVERWHELMING. AT FIRST IS WAS A LITTLE UPSET THAT I HAD TO WAIT SO LONG FOR MY SURGERY, BUT I WILL PROBABLY NEED ALL OF THAT TIME FOR ALL OF THE THINGS THAT I HAVE TO DO (GALL BLADDER SONOGRAM, PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION, LAB WORK, CHEST X-RAY, COMPLETE ABG'S, EKG, ETC...)I GUESS IF I HAD TO DO IT ALL IN TWO WEEKS I COULD, NO I KNOW I COULD. WELL, SINCE MY GALL BLADDER SONOGRAM AND MY PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION CAN BE DONE RIGHT AWAY, I'LL GET START ON THEM. UNTIL NEXT TIME PEOPLE...

DEC 28, 2001

AFTER READING MY PACKET FROM MY DOCTOR A LITTLE MORE CAREFUL, I FOUND THAT ALL OF THE THING THAT HAVE TO BE DONE BEFORE MY SURGERY, MOST HAVE TO BE DONE WITHIN 30 DAYS OF THE PROCEDURE, EXCEPT FOR THE GALL BLADDER SONOGRAM AND PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION. SO FAR, PSYC. EVALUATION IS SCHEDULED FOR FEB 18, 2002

JAN 1, 2002

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! LAST NIGHT I DECIDED THAT I WOULD STAY HOME WITH MY CHILDREN. I TOLD EVERYONE THAT I JUST WANTED TO BRING THE NEW YEAR IN WITH THEM, BUT THE TRUTH IS I DID NOT FEEL LIKE THE HEADACHE OF FINDING SOMETHING THAT I DIDN'T LOOK FAT IN. IT'S PRETTY IMPOSSIBLE WHEN YOU ARE FAT! WELL WHEN THE CLOCK STRUCK 12 I WAS THE ONLY ONE AWAKE. I HAD MY KIDS AND MY COUSIN'S KIDS. EVERYONE WAS ASLEEP. MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION IS TO NOT BRING IN ANOTHER NEW YEAR (AT LEAST FOR THE NEXT 10 YEAR) HOME WITH A BUNCH OF SLEEPY BABIES BECAUSE I LIKE TO PARRTY (LOL). I CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT YEAR.

FEB 18, 2002

I JUST RETURNED FROM MY PSYCOLOGICAL EVALUATION THAT SEEMED MORE LIKE A FIRST DATE. THE PSYCOLOGIST THAT DR. V RECOMMENDS IS NAME DR. GEWANTHER. HE AND I JUST SAT DOWN AND CHATTED FOR ABOUT AN HOUR ABOUT ME. HE WROTE A LOT OF THINGS DOWN AND AT THE END OF OUR CONVERSATION HE JUST SAID GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR SURGERY AND HE THOUGHT I WAS A PERFECT CANDIDATE AND WOULD DO WELL WITH IT. IT WAS HARDLY WHAT I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.

I GUESS EACH DOCTOR DOES THINGS DIFFERENT BECAUSE I REMEMBER ONE OF THE DOCTORS THAT I INTERVIEWED BEFORE CHOOSING DR. V TOLD ME THAT FOR THE PSYCOLOGICAL EVALUATION THERE WOULD BE A 1 1/2 HOUR YES & NO QUESTION/ANSWER PERIOD.

APRIL 1, 2001

LAST NIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME, I HAD A TERRIBLE PANIC/ANXIETY ATTACK ABOUT THE SURGERY. I KNEW IT WOULD BE COMING, BUT I DIDN'T KNOW WHEN OR HOW HARD IT WOULD BE. IT WAS BAD, BUT I THINK I GOT THROUGH IT SO WELL BECAUSE OF THIS SITE. I READ HERE ALMOST DAILY AND SEE THAT MANY PEOPLE GET GITTERS WHEN THEIR TIME DRAWS NEAR. I KEPT TELLING MYSELF THAT IT WAS NORMAL AND IT WOULD PASS AND WHEN I WOKE UP THIS MORNING IT DID. I HOPE I WON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH MUCH MORE OF THAT. NOW THAT MY SURGERY IS JUST 36 DAYS AWAY, I GUESS I BETTER START WORKING ON FINDING ME AN ANGEL. HOPEFULLY I CAN FIND A SISTA THAT LIVES IN MY AREA, BUT ANY VOLUNTEERS WOULD BE GLADLY APPRECIATED.

APRIL 11, 2001

I HAVE ASKED TO WOMEN TO BE MY ANGELS AND BOTH OF THEM HAVE ACCEPTED SO THAT MAKE ME VERY HAPPY. MY ONLY PROBLEM NOW IS THAT I KEEP HAVING THESE TERRIBLE PANIC ATTACKS. I HAVE STAYED AWAY FROM MY DAILY READING OF THIS MESSAGE BOARD TO KEEP MY MIND OFF OF WHAT IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN, BUT BECAUSE THINGS ARE SO SLOW HERE TODAY AT WORK I DECIDED TO TAKE A PEAK. WHAT DID I DO THAT FOR.

THE FIRST MESSAGE WAS FROM THE HUSBAND OF A "JENNY R" WHO PASSED AWAY A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO FROM A HEART ATTACK. BOY WAS THIS THE LAST THING THAT I NEEDED TO HEAR. I READ THROUGH HER PROFILE AND SAW THAT DURING HER PRE OP THER WAS SOME INDICATION THAT THERE MAYBE A PROBLEM WITH HER HEART AND I DON'T THINK HER HAD ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE SURGERY, BUT STILL I'M FREAKED. I THOUGHT GOING THROUGH TWO PREGNANCIES ALONE WAS AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER, BUT THAT WAS NOTHING COMPAIRED TO THIS. MY DOCTOR TRIED TO GET ME TO TAKE SOME ANTIDEPRESENTS WHEN I WAS GOING THOUGH CHANGES BACK THEN, BUT BECAUSE OF THE STIGMA ATTACHED AND THE FEAR OF ADDICTION I REFUSED TO TAKE THE PILLS, BUT IF THIS THING I AM GOING THROUGH NOW PERSISTS I'M GOING TO HAVE TO TAKE SOMETHING BEFORE I DRIVE MY OWN ASS CRAZY. I KEEP TELLING MYSELF, "AND THIS TOO SHALL PASS", BUT IT'S NOT. JUST BEFORE I DECIDED TO UPDATE MY PROFILE I WAS SITTING HERE WRITING DOWN REQUEST FOR MY FUNERAL. I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD FEEL LIKE THIS.

APRIL 12, 2002

I HAVE DONE A 360 SINCE YESTERDAY. I GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO TALK TO ONE OF MY ANGELS BRENDA HARGETT AND BOY DID SHE MAKE ME FEEL GOOD. WE TALKED FOR OVER A HOUR ON THE TELEPHONE. I HOPE I CAN KEEP THIS FEELING GOING.

APRIL 15, 2002

I'M FEELING BETTER AND BETTER. I GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO TALK TO MY OTHER ANGEL LAVONDA LAST NIGHT AND I MUST SAY, BOTH OF THESE LADIES ARE AWESOME. I AM SO GLAD TO HAVE THEM.

APRIL 17, 2002

I JUST CAME FROM MY PRE-OP WITH MY REGULAR DOCTOR AND BOY WAS I PLEASANTLY SURPRISED. BEFORE I WENT INTO HER OFFICE I PUT ON MY PKER FACE AND WAS DETERMINED TO IGNORE ANYTHING THAT SHE HAD TO SAY, BECAUSE I JUST KNEW IT WOULD BE ALL NEGATIVE, BUT IT WASN'T. SHE WAS SO EXCITED AND HAPPY FOR ME THAT IT MADE ME GET A LITTLE MORE EXCITED MYSELF. SHE SAYS THAT WAITING TO GET A PATIENT WHO WAS HAVING THIS PROCEDURE DONE AND I WAS HER FIRST.
I'LL TELL YOU, I'VE BEEN WITH THIS WOMAN FOR 10 YEAR AND I THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO BE SET AGAINST IT, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, "AS SOON AS YOU THINK YOU KNOW SOMEBODY THEY GO AND SWITCH UP ON YOU"

APRIL 29, 2002

PANIC HAS SET IN AGAIN AND IT'S WORSE THAN THE FIRST TIME. ONE WEEK TO GO!

MAY 3, 2002

OH WELL, THIS IS IT. I PROBABLY WON'T BE UPDATING FOR A WHILE BECAUSE I HAVEN'T SET UP MY COMPUTER AT MY HOUSE YET. WHEN I CAN GET TO A COMPUTER AGAIN I WILL WRITE ABOUT HOW THINGS WENT.

MAY 12, 2002

WELL IT'S DONE. FINALLY. DON'T HAVE MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THE HOSPITAL STAY. I DRUNK MY ONE ONCE EVERY 15 MINUTES, WALKED EVERY TWO HOURS OR SO AND GOT MY PAIN MEDS ABOUT EVERY 4 HOURS OR SO. TOMORROW WILL BE ONE WEEK AND I STILL DON'T FEEL DIFFERENT AND THAT'S PROBABLY GOOD, BUT I THOUGHT I WOULD FEEL DIFFERENT WITH A SMALLER STOMACH AND A BYPASS. I BASICALLY FEEL ALMOST EXACTLY THE WAY I FELT AFTER HAVING MY TUBS TIED, EXCEPT THE FEELING HAS LASTED LONGER.

I'M PRETTY GOOD AT MEASURING MY FOOD. I DON'T EAT OR DRINK MORE THATN 4 OZS A HOUR. MY DOCTOR SAYS DRINK FOR TWO HOURS AND EAT FOR ONE AND KEEP UP THAT PATTERN, BUT, I DO WHAT EVER I FEEL LIKE I WANT. IF I FEEL LIKE EATING FOR TWO HOURS STRAIGHT I DO. I HAVEN'T FELT FULL YET, BUT I AM SATISFIED AFTER EVERY MEAL OR DRINK.

ONE THINK I HAVE BEEN FEELING FOR THE LAST THREE DAY IS KNOTS IN MY STOMACH. THEY ARE NOT PAINFUL THOUGH. I THINK IT'S BECAUSE I HAVEN'T HAD A BM YET. I DON'T THINK I HAVE EVER BEEN CONSTIPATED IN MY LIFE. BEFORE SURGERY I WENT EVERY DAY AND SOMETIMES TWICE A DAY. I HAVEN'T HAD ONE SINCE SURGERY, SO I'M GUESSING THIS IS WHAT CONSTIPATION FEELS LIKE. I'VE TOLD MYSELF AS LONG AS IT DOESN'T GO FROM BEING UNCOMFORTABLE TO PAINFUL I WON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. IF THE KNOTS DON'T DISAPPEAR AFTER I GO, I WILL CALL MY DOCTOR.

FYI
TOTAL HOSPITAL CHARGES, NOT INCLUDING SURGEONS FEES: $8,610.49

MAY 21, 2002

TODAY WAS MY TWO WEEK FOLLOW UP. I AM DOWN 16 POUNDS FROM MY STARTING WEIGHT WHEN I WENT INTO SURGERY WHICH WAS 230. I DON'T FEEL ANY DIFFERENT AND I DON'T THINK ANYONE HAS NOTICED BECAUSE I THINK MOST IF THE 16 IS PROBABLY WATER WEIGHT.

MY GOAL GOING INTO SURGERY WAS TO LOSE 80 POUNDS BY THE NEW YEAR WHICH EQUALS SOMETHING LIKE 10 POUNDS A MONTH OR 2 - 3 POUNDS A WEEK. I HOPE I CAN DO IT BECAUSE I KNOW MY WEIGHT LOSS WILL PROBABLY SLOW DOWN CONSIDERABLY ONCE I CAN EAT MORE FOOD AND I'VE NOTICED THAT PEOPLE WHO START OUT WHERE I AM USUALLY ONLY HAVE ABOUT 6 - 8 MONTHS TO LOSE THEIR MAXIMUM AMOUNT OF WEIGHT BEFORE THEY PLATEAU TO A STAND STILL. I HAVE NO DESIRE TO LOSE 100 POUNDS. I THINK I WOULD LOOK SICK. 150 WAS MY MOST COMFORTABLE WEIGHT. I WENT UNDER THAT ONCE ON A DIET AND FELT VERY WEIRD.

P.S. THAT KNOT IS MY STOMACH IS GONE.

MAY 25, 2002

YESTERDAY AT THE LAST SECOND I DECIDED TO GO TO A PARTY THAT MY COUSIN WAS GIVING AND OF COURSE I NEEDED AN OUTFIT SO I WENT TO ASHLEY STEWART (THE SHOP FOR THE BIG S). WHEN I BROUGHT SOME PIECES FOR THE WINTER FROM THERE THEY WERE SIZE 20/22. SO YESTERDAY I FIGURED THAT 15 POUNDS OR SO SHOULD EQUAL A DRESS SIZE, SO I TOOK SEVERAL THING IN THE DRESSING ROOM THAT WERE A SIZE 18 AND GUESS WHAT, NONE OF THEM FIT. I HAD TO HAVE AN ASSOCIATE EXCHANGE EVERYTHING FOR A SIZE 16. DAMN I LOOKED GOOD. I DON'T KNOW IF THE CLOTHES WERE EXTRA CUTE OR IF IT WAS JUST THE FACT THAT I HAVEN'T WORN A SIZE 16 SINCE I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY ALMOST 4 YEAR OLD. AFTER I FOUND THE PERFECT OUTFIT FOR THE AFFAIR IT WAS REALLY RUNNING LATE SO I WENT HOME, TOOK A SHOWER, WEIGHED MYSELF (STILL 214) AND WEND OUT. IT'S BEEN SO LONG SINCE I WENT OUT DANCING. I WAS ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE AT THE PARTY THAT STARTED AT 10 P.M. AND I DANCED FROM THE TIME I CAME IN THE DOOR UNTIL IT WAS OVER AT 2 A.M. THE ONLY TIME I SAT DOWN WAS FOR A SHORT PERIOD WHEN THE DJ DECIDED TO PLAY CLUB MUSIC. I CLUB MUSIC. THIS MORNING WHEN I GOT UP I TOOK A SHOWER AND THIS SAME PERSON WHO COULDN'T FOR THE LIFE OF HER FIGURE OUT WHY THE PEOPLE ON THIS SIGHT WEIGHT THEMSELVES SO MUCH JUMPED ON THE SCALE AGAIN AND THE THING SAID 212. I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT, BECAUSE JUST LAST NIGHT IT SAID 214 SO I CHANGED THE BATTERIES AND THE NUMBER WAS STILL 212. HOW COOL IS THAT?

JUNE 4,2002

TODAY I WENT FOR MY FOUR WEEK CHECKUP AND I WEIGHED IN AT 204. I ABOSLUTELY COULDN'T BELIEVE IT. 26 LBS IN ONE MONTH. THAT WAS TOTALLY MORE THAN I EVER EXPECTED, AND TO BE HONEST IT KINDA WORRIED ME A BIT BECAUSE I THOUGHT THAT WAS A BIT MUCH, BUT MY DOCTOR SAYS NOT TO WORRY BECAUSE I WILL PROBABLY LOOSE ABOUT 1/2 OF THAT MY SECOND MONTH (WHICH EQUALS 13 LBS) AND ABOUT 1/2 OF THAT EACH MONTH AFTER UNTIL I REACH MY FINAL PLATEAU. I CAN DEAL WITH THAT.

JUNE 8, 2002

IT HAPPENED AGAIN. I WENT ON A BOAT CRUISE LAST NIGHT AND OF CORSE I WEIGHED MYSELF BEFORE I LEFT AND THIS MORNING THE SCALE HAS DROPPED 2 LBS AGAIN. IT MUST BE THE DANCING. IT WAS A FOUR HOUR CRUISE AND I DANCED FOR THREE. ALSO, MY DOCTOR'S OFFICE CALLED ON THURSDAY AND SAID ALL OF MY WORK CAME BACK JUST GREAT.

JUNE 9, 2002

I JUST CAME FROM A PARTY WITH MY ONE YEAR OLD AT CHUCKY E. CHEESE AND GUESS WHAT. I WENT THROUGH THE WHOLE MAZE WITH HIM. MY FAMILY THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY, BUT I SAID IF I CAN FIT THROUGH THAT FIRST HOLE I'M GOING IN AND I DID. THE LAST TIME WE WENT THERE BEFORE SURGERY I WAS OUT OF BREATH JUST BENDING OVER THE PUT MY KIDS INTO THE MAZE.

OH, ONE OTHER THING, I ALSO GOT THAT B-12 SHOT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S SUPPOSED TO DO FOR YOU, BUT I FEEL THE SAME AS I DID BEFORE I GOT IT.

JUNE 17, 2002

TODAY WAS MY FIRST DAY BACK TO WORK. I FEEL REALLY GOOD AND I GOT A THOUSAND COMPLIMENTS TODAY. WHEN I LEFT WORK SIX WEEKS AGO I WAS WEARING A SIZE 22. TODAY I AM WEARING A SIZE 18 REGULAR OR 14/16 WIDE. I HAVE ALREADY HAD TO GIVE AWAY A TRASHBAG FULL OF CLOTHES THAT JUST FALL OFF OF ME NOW.

I HAVE BEEN GOING THROUGH WITHDRAWAL FOR THE LAST WEEK OR SO BECAUSE MY SCALE NEEDS A NEW BATTERY AND I JUST HAVEN'T GOTTEN AROUND TO GETTING A NEW ONE. AT THIS POINT I STILL HAVEN'T VOMITTED OR HAD DIAREAH, BUT WHEN I EAT SOMETHING THAT I THINK WON'T BOTHER ME AND IT DOES I DO FEEL LIKE I GET THE DUMPING SYNDROME WITHOUT THE ACTUAL DUMPING AND IT USUALLY TAKES ABOUT A HOUR FOR IT TO PASS. I HAVEN'T DONE ANY CHEATING ON PURPOSE, SO IT IS FRUSTRATING WHEN THE DUMPING SYNDROME COMES OVER ME SO UNEXPECTANTLY (MAYBE ONCE A WEEK).

JULY 3, 2002

YESTERDAY WAS MY TWO MONTH POST-OP APPOINTMENT. I WEIGHED IN AT 194 LBS. NOT BAD, BUT I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE MORE AND THAT IS ONLY BECAUSE THE LAST TIME I WORE A SIZE 14/16 I WAS 20 LBS LIGHTER. I GUESS THIS MEANS I'VE JUST LOST A LOT OF INCHES IN THESE FIRST TWO MONTHS.

JULY 5, 2002

LAST NIGHT I WAS THINKING. I WAS REALLY DISAPPOINTED WHEN I WENT TO THE DOCTOR'S ON TUESDAY AND FOUND THAT I HAD ONLY LOST 10 POUNDS FOR THE MONTH AS APPOSED TO THE 13 THAT HE SAID I WOULD PROBABLY LOSE (AND EVEN I KNOW THAT WAS JUST AN ESTIMATE). THEN THE MORE I THOUGHT ABOUT IT, IT HIT ME. I AM 4 POUNDS SHY OF BEING HALFWAY TO MY GOAL AFTER ONLY 2 MONTHS. NOW HOW MANY OTHER PEOPLE CAN SAY THAT. HOW STUPID OF ME NOT TO BE SATISFIED. I GUESS I JUST FELT LIKE I FAILED BECAUSE I HAD THAT 13 IN MY MIND. NOW I REALIZE I'M STILL A WINNER!

JULY 29, 2002

JUST A FEW THINGS. ON FRIDAY I TOOK OUT THE BRAIDS THAT I HAD PUT IN MY HAIR FOR SURGERY AND IN ALL I LOST A BALL OF HAIR BIGGER THAN A GOLF BALL BUT SMALLER THAN A TENNIS BALL. I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO BE BALD. MY HAIR IS VERY, VERY THICK AND THAT LITTLE BIT THAT I LOST JUST HELP THIN IT OUT A LITTLE TO MAKE IT MORE MANAGEABLE. AFTER ALL OF THOSE BRAIDS WERE TAKEN OUT AND MY HAIR WAS PERMED AND PULLED BACK, I SAW MY WEIGHT LOSS IN MY FACE AND I LOOK GOOD! I KNEW I WAS GETTING SMALLER BECAUSE I COULDN'T DARE FIT ANYTHING THAT I HAD BEFORE SURGERY, BUT I GUESS I COULDN'T REALLY SEE IT. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I WEIGH BECAUSE I HAVEN'T WEIGHED MYSELF SINCE MY SCALE BROKE AFTER MY FIRST MONTH POST OP, BUT ON SUNDAY IT WAS SO HOT THAT I ASKED MY 14 YEAR OLD SISTER FOR A PAIR OF HER BAGGY SHORTS AND THAT LITTLE HUSSIE BROUGH ME A PAIR OF SHORTS IN A SIZE 12. I WAS . I SAID WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO WITH THEM, I ASKED FOR A PAIR OF YOUR BIG SHORT. SHE SAID JUST TRY THEM ON BECAUSE THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES I CAN FIND SO I FIGURED I WOULD SQUEEZE IN THEM, BUT THE SLID RIGHT ON. I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT. BESIDES THE TIME IN 1994 WHEN I LOST 45 POUNDS FOR SIX MONTHS, I HAVEN'T FIT INTO A SIZE 12 SINCE I WAS ABOUT 12.

AUGUST 7, 2002

THREE MONTH POST-OP CHECK UP ON YESTERDAY AND I'M DOWN 48 POUNDS TO 182. THAT'S 12 POUNDS DOWN THIS PAST MONTH. MORE THAN I EXPECTED. I ALSO GOT A BONUS. MY DOCTOR GAVE ME A COUPLE OF MONTHS SUPPLY OF THE IRON SUPPLEMENT THAT WE ARE SUPPOSED TO TAKE. UNFORTUNATLY, I HAVEN'T TAKEN ANY IRON SINCE SURGERY BECAUSE MY INSURANCE WOULD NOT COVER THE $135 A MONTH COST EVEN AFTER APPEAL BECAUSE I'M NOT ANEMIC OR SICK. THEY WON'T PAY TO KEEP ME FROM GETTING SICK, BUT THEY WILL PAY ONCE I'M SICK, SO I FIGURED IF IT WAS SICK THEY WANTED, SICK THEY WOULD GET! WHEN I SAID THAT, THE NURSE IN MY DOCTOR'S OFFICE LOOKED AT ME LIKE I WAS CRAZY AND HURRIED OFF TO BRING ME AS MANY SAMPLES AS SHE COULD FIT INTO HER HANDS.

AUGUST 26, 2002

TODAY FOR LUNCH MY FRIEND AND I WALKED DOWN TO THE GALLERY (A SHOPPING CENTER AT THE INNER HARBOR). WE STOPPED IN VICTORIA SECERET'S SO THAT I COULD FIND OUT MY BRA SIZE. I FIGURED IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO BUY ONE SINCE EVERYONE HAS MADE COMMENTS ABOUT ME NOT REALL WEARING BRAS SINCE I HAD SURGERY. IT'S JUST THAT IT'S SUMMER TIME AND I DON'T WANT TO BE BOUND DOWN BY A BRA, NOT EVEN A STRAPLESS ONE. BUT ANYWAY, WE WENT AND I FOUND OUT THAT I AM A SIZE 36D. WHAT A DIFFERENCE A BRA MAKES. MY WERE POPPING OUT EVERYWHERE WHEN I HAD THAT THING ON. THEY LOOKED GOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW IF I OR THE REST OF THE WORLD WANTS ALL OF THAT YET SO I DIDN'T BUY ONE, BUT AT LEAST I KNOW MY SIZE.

REFLECTIONS:

THINGS I DIDN'T EXPECT TO BE ABLE TO EAT THAT I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH: BEEF, SHRIMP, DAIRY (EXCEPT WHOLE MILK)

THINGS I CAN'T EAT: LUNCHEON MEAT, KFC CHICKEN (ONLY)

SEPTEMBER 11, 2002

FOUR MONTH UPDATE YESTERDAY.

I'M DOWN 12 MORE POUNDS SINCE LAST MONTH. THAT'S A TOTAL OF 60 POUNDS ALL TOGETHER. I'M A PERFECT SIZE 12 AND I SWEAR IF I DIDN'T LOOSE ANOTHER POUND I AM PERFECTLY HAPPY!!!

OCTOBER 9, 2002

FIVE MONTH WEIGH IN YESTERDAY. DOWN 5 MORE POUNDS GIVING ME A GRAND TOTAL OF 65 POUND. BETWEEN A SIZE 10 AND 12 NOW AT 165 POUNDS. I GET WAY TOO MANY COMPLEMENT EVERY DAY. IT MAKES ME FEEL SELF COUNCIOUS EVEN THOUGH IT'S ALL BEEN POSITIVE. EVERY ONE KEEPS CALLING ME SKINNY AND TINY. I DON'T WANT TO BE SKINNY OR TINY. I DON'T WANT TO LOOSE ANYMORE WEIGHT. I HAVE NEVER BEEN THIS SMALL BEFORE. I'M SCARED TO BE ANY SMALLER. THE MOST APPEALING WOMEN IN MY EYES ARE BETWEEN A 8 - 12 IN SIZE. ANYONE SMALLER HAS ALWAYS BEEN TOO SKINNY IN MY EYES, BUT I GUESS I WILL GET USED TO IT. T.T.F.N. (TA TA FOR NOW)

OCTOBER 23, 2002

HAPPY DAY, HAPPY DAY! IT'S OFFICIAL, I'VE LOST TWO FULL SHOE SIZES. BEFORE SURGERY I WAS A SIZE 12W, NOW I'M A 10W. THIS IS FABULOUS NEWS CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I'M ONY 5'2".

NOVEMBER 6, 2002

TIME SURE FLYS WHEN YOU'RE HAVING FUN. IT BEEN SIX MONTHS NOW AND I FEEL GREAT. MY SIX MONTH CHECK UP WAS YESTERDAY AND I AM DOWN TO 157LBS. SEVEN POUNDS TO GO TO REACH MY PERSONAL GOAL. HOPEFULLY I'LL BE THERE BEFORE THEN END OF THE YEAR LIKE I PLANNED.

DECEMBER 4, 2002

CRAZY MIXED FEELINGS HERE. I'M REALLY HAPPY WITH MY SIZE NOW. I THINK A SIZE 10 IS PERFECT FOR ME, BUT FOR SOME REASON WHEN I WENT FOR MY SEVEN MONTH CHECK UP ON YESTERDAY AND FOUND THAT I ONLY LOST 2 POUNDS I FELT A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED. KINDA LIKE I HAD FAILED. I EXPECTED TO LOOSE AT LEAST 4 POUNDS THIS LAST MONTH IN ORDER TO REACH MY PERSONAL GOAL OF BEING 150 POUNDS BY THE NEW YEAR. THERE IS STILL HOPE THOUGH, I HAVE 28 DAYS TO LOOSE THIS LAST FIVE POUNDS. WE'LL SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

JANUARY 8, 2003

WELL IT DIDN'T HAPPEN, BUT I AM FAR FROM DISAPPOINTED! I DID MEET MY BIGGER GOAL, WHICH WAS TO NOT SPEND NEW YEARS EVE HOME WITH CHILDREN. I WENT OUT AND I HAD A BALL AND I'M DOWN 3 POUND.

JANUARY 21, 2003

A TRAGEDY HAS OCCURRED!!! I WENT TO VICTORIA'S SECRET ON YESTERDAY AND MY SECRET WAS REVEALED. I HAVE GONE FROM A "D" TO A "B". LORD HELP ME, MY BOOBIES ARE GONE!

FEBRUARY 4, 2003

I'M A MONTH LATE, BUT I DID IT. I HAVE REACHED MY GOAL! I AM 150 POUNDS. OH HOW SWEET IT IS. I'M DOING PERFECTLY FINE AND HAVEN'T HAD ANY COMPLICATIONS OR REGRETS, HOWEVER, I DO GET THIS NAGGINGS BURING, TINGLING, PINS AND NEEDLES TYPE OF FEELING RUNNING DOWN MY FRONT LEFT THIGH AT NIGHT HERE A LOT LATELY. I'VE LOOKED THROUGH THE LIBRARY AND SEE THAT FOR SOME REASON A SIGNIFICANT NUMBER OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD THIS SURGERY EXPERIENCE THE SAME THING FOR UP TO A YEAR SOMETIME. WHAT A SMALL PRICE TO PAY!

MARCH 5, 2003

YESTERDAY MY LIFE FLASHED BEFORE EYES. I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE. MY RUSHED TO MY HEAD, A RED LIGHT FLASHED BEFORE MY EYES, I LOST MY BREATH AND STIRRED STRAIGHT IN THE EYES. AFTER THAT TWO SECONDS HAD PASSED, I CAME BACK TO REALITY TO FIND THAT THAT 153 WAS STILL ON THE SCALE. I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT, THAT SCALE SAYS I GAINED 3 POUNDS SINCE LAST MONTH. NOW WHY WOULD MY DOCTOR HAVE ME STAND ON A BROKE SACALE I THOUGHT TO MYSELF, HE MUST BE CRAZY.

THIS MORNING WHEN I WOKE UP I REALIZED THAT MAYBE MY DOCTOR'S SCALE WASN'T BROKEN. I CAME ON MY PERIOD. I PRAY THAT 3 POUNDS IS JUST WATER WEIGHT GAIN AND IT WILL BE GONE NEXT MONTH.

APRIL 2, 2003

1...4...7, YES, THAT'S 147. I LOST 5 WHOLE POUNDS LAST MONTH. ISN'T THAT TERRIFIC? WHEN I WENT INTO MY DOCTOR'S OFFICE I SAT DOWN AND THE NURSE LOOKED AT ME FOR A MINUTE BEFORE SHE FINALLY ASKED ME IF I WANTED TO GET ON THE SCALE. I SAID IF YOU INSIST AND GOT UP THERE AND HELD MY BREATH UNTIL IT STOPPED. I DID WHAT SHE SAID AND INCREASED MY PROTIENS AND DECREASED MY SUGARS AND CARBS. THE ONLY THING IS AFTER BUYING A BIG BAG OF PEANUTS FOR THREE WEEKS IN A ROW AND GETTING THRUSH ON MY TOUNGE AND A SORE THROAT, I'V DISCOVERED THAT I AM NOW ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS. OH WELL!

THAT BURNING AND TINGLING THING THAT I HAVE BEEN HAVING IN MY LEG HAS NOT GOTTEN BETTER AND IN THE LAST THREE DAYS OR SO HAVE BEEN WAKING ME OUT OF MY SLEEP AT NIGHT. MY REGULAR DOCTOR SENT ME FOR A SONOGRAM AND NERVE CONDUCTION TEST LAST MONTH AND THEY FOUND THAT I HAVE MARAGLIA PARESTETICA FROM THE SURGERY, WHICH IS BASICALLY FROM THE CUT PROBABLY GOING THROUGH A NERVE THAT RUNS DOWN MY LEFT LEG OR THE STRAP DURING SURGERY CUTTING OFF CIRCULATION AND CAUSING SOME NERVE DAMAGE. WHATEVER THE CASE IS, SHE PERSCRIBED SOME PILLS THAT I'M SUPPOSED TO TAKE THREE TIMES A DAY. FAT CHANCE OF THAT HAPPENING, CONSIDERING I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER TO TAKE MY VITAMINS ONCE A DAY SOMETIMES.

MAY 6, 2003

HAPP ANNIVERSARY TO ME!!! IT'S BEEN ON YEAR AND I DID THE DAMN THING! I'M HOVERING AROUND 150LBS, GIVE OR TAKE. NO LONG SPEACH, I FEEL GREAT AND I WEAR A SIZE 8!

JULY 1, 2003

152. NOT A OUNCE GAINED OR LOST SINCE MY LAST APPOINTMENT. MY DOCTOR WILL SUBMIT PICTURES WHEN I GO BACK IN OCTOBER TO TRY AND HAVE MY PANNI TAKEN CARE OF.

AUGUST 15, 2003

SOMEBODY SLAP ME AND WAKE ME UP!!!!!!!!! LIFE IS SO BEAUTIFUL RIGHT NOW AND THING COULDN'T BE ANY BETTER FOR ME. MY WEIGHT IS STEADY, I'M GETTING A PROMOTION ON MY FULL-TIME JOB, I JUST GOT APPROVED FOR A HOUSE AND LESS THAN A MONTH AGO I STARTED A AT HOME BUSINESS THAT HAS EARNED ME A COOL $1200 BUCKS SO FAR AND THAT FOR JUST 20 - 30 HOURS OF WORK. I CAN JUST IMAGINE THE KIND OF MONEY I COULD HAVE MADE IF I KNEW ABOUT THIS WHEN I WAS ON LEAVE FROM WORK, I COULD HAVE CLEANED UP. THIS IS PERFECT FOR ALL OF THOSE THAT ARE OUT OF WORK OR AT HOME RECOVERING.

SEPTEMBER 15, 2003

JUST A QUICK CHECK-IN, LIFE IS GREAT, COULDN'T BE DOING BETTER. THAT TINGLING BURNING FEELING HAS RETURNED. I DON'T WEIGH MYSELF ANYMORE, BUT I PULLED OUT SOME OF MY HEAVIER CLOTHES FROM THE SPRING AND THEY FIT AS PERFECTLY NOW AS THEY DID THEN SO I GUESS MY WEIGHT IS STILL STEADY BETWEEN A SIZE 8 AND 10.

OCTOBER 28, 2003

I WENT TO THE DOCTOR'S TODAY, BUT I COULDN'T STAY FOR MY APPOINTMENT BECAUSE I HAD A PERSONAL BUSINESS RECEPTION PLANNED AT MY HOME. I DID WEIGHT IN THOUGH, I'M 148. MY APPOINTMENT HAS BEEN CHANGED TO NOVEMBER 21ST. TALK TO YOU THEN!

NOVEMBER 21, 2003

DOWN ANOTHER POUND TO 147. UNFORTUNATELY MY DOCTOR TELLS ME THAT MY PANNI DOESN'T HANG FAR ENOUGH FOR MY INSURANCE TO PAY TO HAVE MY EXTRA SKIN REMOVED SO I WILL HAVE TO BE A CASH PATIENT. I REALLY WANTED SOME FOR MY 30TH BIRTHDAY, SO I GUESS IT'S GOING TO HAVE TO BE MY GOAL TO GET IT ALL DONE AT ONE TIME.

DECEMBER 29, 2003

CONFESSIONS OF A MAD BLACK WOMAN: SINCE CHRISTMAS DAY I HAVE BEEN FULL. AS SOON AS I FEEL LIKE I CAN STAND ANOTHER BITE I TAKE ANOTHER BITE. IT SURE IS A MISERABLE FEELING, BUT THE FOOD HAS BEEN TOOOOOOO GOOD. I CAN'T IMAGINE WHAT I AM DOING TO MY POUCH OR WILL I WILL WEIGH WHEN I GO BACK FOR A CHECK UP IN MARCH. I'M ABOUT TO EXPLODE RIGHT HERE AS I WRIGHT. THIS CHICKEN IS SO GOOD, HOPEFULLY IN AN HOUR I WILL BE ABLE TO FINISHE THESE LASTE 5 BITES.

MARCH 17, 2004

WENT TO SEE DR. V TODAY. WEIGHT IS STEADY, BUT IRON IS LOW. I TAKING THOSE PILLS NOW. I MAY TAKE THEM 2 - 3 TIMES A WEEK. LIFE IS WONDERFUL OTHERWISE.

MAY 6, 2004

IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS NOW AND I FEEL GREAT. NO PROBLEMS, WEIGHT STEADY AND DON'T REALLY THINK ABOUT WHAT I EAT ANYMORE, MEANING, BEFORE SURGERY I DIDN'T WANT LIVER BECAUSE I KNEW I DIDN'T LIKE IT AND OF COURSE I DIDN'T CRAVE IT. NOW IT'S IN MY HEAD AND I KNOW THAT EATTING A FULL SIZE PLATE OR MORE THAT 12 GRAMS OF SUGAR AT A TIME MAKES ME SICK, SO I DON'T STRESS ABOUT IT OR THINK ABOUT IT I JUST DON'T DO IT OR WANT TO DO IT JUST LIKE I DON'T WANT TO OR WON'T EAT LIVER. THINKING THAT I WOULD MISS FOOD THAT I LOVED BEFORE WAS A BIG FEAR OF MINE BEFORE SURGERY. THERE IS NOT ONE THING THAT I WANT TO EAT THAT I DON'T, IT'S JUST ON A MUCH, MUCH SMALLER SCALE. IF I WANT CHOCOLATE, INSTEAD OF EATING A ENTIRE BAR, I EAT 1 OR TWO OF THE LITTLE SQUARES. INSTEAD OF EATTING A DOZEN OF CRABS I EAT 3.

JULY 30, 2004

TODAY IS A GREAT DAY FOR ME. IT IS MY LAST DAY AT WORK. MY BUSINESS THAT I STARTED LAST YEAR IS ROCKIN'. MY ONLY CONCERN IS LOSING MY HEALTH INSURANCE, AND NOT BEING ABLE TO GET THE GREAT SERVICE I HAVE SO FAR WITH BLUE CROSS. I'M GOING TO HAVE TO BUY MY OWN INSURANCE NOW, BUT WHO CARE!

SEPTEMBER 7, 2004

THE CHILDREN RETURNED TO SCHOOL TODAY AND I'M FEELING A LITTLE PANIC COMING ON. WITH ALL OF THE TIME THAT I HAVE ON MY HAND NOW I'M WONDERING IF I'M GOING TO START EATING MORE AND MOVING LESS.

OCTOBER 20, 2004

CONVERTED THE CLOSET OVER FROM SUMMER TO FALL/WINTER AND TRIED ON A FEW THINGS. I'M HAPPY TO REPORT THAT EVERYTHING FITS AS PERFECTLY AS IT DID LAST YEAR WHICH MEANS NO WEIGHT GAIN. I'VE BEEN A SIZE 8/10 FOR ALMOST 2 YEARS NOW!!!!!!!

MAY 6, 2005

3 YEARS OUT!!!!!!!!!!! NOT MUCH TO SAY EXCEPT THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE DONE. LIFESTYLE SEEMS NORMAL NOW.

JULY 18, 2005

WENT TO THE DOCTOR'S TODAY AND I WEIGHT 160 EXACTLY. THIS MEANS I HAVE PICKED UP 10 POUNDS SOMEWHERE, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHERE BECAUSE I'M STILL WEARING A SIZE 10.

May 6, 2006

ITS BEEN 4 YEARS NOW AND WHEN I MENTION MY PRIOR WEIGHT TO PEOPLE, THEY CAN'T BELIEVE I WAS THAT BIG. JUST ABOUT ALL OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS NOW NEVER SAW ME AT A SIZE 22 (REALLY NEEDING A 24). I'M STILL IN MY SIZE 10'S AND THAT EXTRA 10 POUNDS I ADDED ON SOMETIME OVER THE LAST YEAR, I THINK ITS ALL IN MY BELLY. MY GOAL IS TO JOIN A GYM NEXT MONTH. THAT IS THE ONE THING I HAVEN'T DONE SINCE MY SURGERY, EXERCISE!!!!! I STILL TAKE MY PILLS 3 - 4 TIMES A WEEK AND MY SHOT EVERY MONTH. LOOKING BACK, ITS BEEN ALL WORTH IT. I ONLY WISH NOW THAT I COULD HAVE THE SKIN ON MY BELLY AND THIGHS REMOVED AND MY BREST FILLED OUT. IT DIDN'T BOTHER ME THE FIRST 3 YEARS, BUT NOW THAT MY LITTLE SISTER AND I ARE THE SAME SIZE I SEE HOW ALL MY CLOTHES WOULD FIT IF I DIDN'T HAVE THE HANGING BELLY!

JULY 30, 2006

IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS NOW SINCE I'VE WORKED A REGULAR 9-5 AND MY FEAR OF LAYING AROUND AND GAINING WEIGHT HAS NOT COME TRUE. I SEEM TO BE JUST AS BUSY NOW AS I WAS BEFORE I RETIRED, I JUST DO THINGS MORE AT MY CONVENIENCE AND MORE OF WHAT I WANT TO DO NOW. FOR THE LAST MONTH OR SO I HAVE BEEN FEELING HUGE!!! MY CLOTHES ARE MORE SNUG AND I AM DEATHLY AFRAID TO GET ON A SCALE. I KNOW ITS BECAUSE OF MR. WONDERFUL THAT I HAVE BEEN DATING. WE GO OUT A COUPLE OF TIMES A WEEK AND USUALLY FINISH THE EVENING, OR SHOULD I SAY MORNING AT 2 AM WITH A LATE NIGHT DINNER. IN THE PAST, UNLESS IM GOING OUT DANCING, IM USUALLY IN BED BY 10 - 11 PM. HERE LATELY, I RARLY SEE THE BED BEFORE MIDNIGHT AND I GET HUNGRY AND HAVE BEEN EATING RIGHT BEFORE BED. I KNOW I NEED TO STOP IT. I'LL KEEP YOU GUYS POSTED ON MY PROGRESS.

MARCH 16, 2007
TODAY IS MY 33RD BIRTHDAY AND IT'S BEEN ALMOST 5 YEARS SINCE MY SURGERY. FEELING PRETTY GOOD EVEN THOUGH I AT 165. DON'T REALLY WANT TO BREAK OUT THE SPRING THINGS BECAUSE I'M AFRAID I WON'T BE ABLE TO FIT ANYTHING. I STAYED AROUND 150 FOR MORE THAN MY FIRST 3 YEARS. NOW I'VE GONE AND PICKED UP 15 HAPPY POUNDS. IT'S GOTTA GO!

0 Comments