Good morning, I also had those thoughts, and I did write those letters to my love ones. one to each of them. then I put them in my file cabinet and I got about them. But felt good writing to them because I said things in it from deep in my heart. YES I cried as I wrote them, it was hard. but I was satisfied. When I did return to my home after my op. I just change words in it, but kept the letters because I realize I can die anytime, it don't have to be from a operation. if my # is up it doesn't matter where I am and what Im doing, or who loves me or how many Kids I have. I got to go. And no one can stop it. This is why I didn't have that much fear going into this surgery. I had concerns, but no fear. So think POSITIVE hon and hang in there. ~*~Hugs~*~