JustCK
Mmm....Beefy
Oct 09, 2013
Vulnerability moment folks! I have a beef addiction! Like all day today, all I could think about was how I could sneak in some beef next week. I even asked my boyfriend if I could blend the cheeseburger patty from McDonald's into my puree stage for next week! Sad, but funny lol I definitely know that I'm going through withdrawals, and like any addiction break, I know that this process is normal. I'm not too hard on myself (side note: I'm getting my master's in psychology, so I tend to be overly compassionate on mental struggles). But, I need to not be too easy on myself to where I end up cheating the system: which is essentially cheating myself and my progress thus far!
Also, I almost have this surreal feeling like I didn't have the surgery. I haven't had any dumping, or nausea since the surgery. Minus the intermittent cramps and constant medications, I forget that I've started this new journey. My mind just gets caught up with ' you're depriving me!'. I'm hoping that once I hit that 50lb mark, or get into a size 18 (which I haven't seen since high school), maybe that will be enough to daily remind me what I'm striving for.