COUNT DOWN TO MY SURGERY DATE
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Weight before surgery 306
August 7,2003
I am so excited. I have been wanting this surgery since last year. My Pcp gave me a referral for Dr. Juarez but his next seminar was not until Oct. 17th. I switched to his new associate, Dr. Fang and will go to his seminar TOMORROW! I can't believe this is finally happening.
I am 5'6" and about 302lbs.
August 21,2003
Was unable to go to my pysch eval appt. Monday. I called the insurance company and was told that Dr. Messer/Dr. Maxwell was not in my network. Was told that the only Dr. approved was Dr. Seaton. My PCP's office was told something different and that I have to go through a company called Contact. Funny because Insurance rep I talked to last week said Pacificare was handling pysch evaluations for all bypass patients. Get it together guys. I will keep records of everyone I talk to so I don't get screwed in the end. I now have an appt. with Celia Drake on Sept. 8th. My consult with Dr. Fang is Sept. 4th.
September 2,2003
Contact approved my appointment with David Seaton for the MMPI. I saw him last week. Seemed very nice and assured me that my results would be at my surgeons consult on the 4th. Beware though that this office is not handicapped acsessible. Canceled my appointment with Celia Drake.
Sept 4, 2003
Will see Dr.Fang today. Still have to gather more records before I go and make a copy just in case something gets lost along the line. Don't know why I am so nervous. Hubby will be there for support. Don't know what I would do without him.
Sept 5, 2003
Had my consult with Dr. Fang yesterday. Office staff very nice and personable. Especially the young red headed girl. No one was wearing tags so I did not catch their names. Dr. Fang is a very quiet speaker but answered all my questions.Spent about 45 minutes. Feel comfortable enough to have surgery with him.
Sept 14,2003
Went Friday for an initial consult to see if I had sleep apnea. Was told I was a canidate. Have to wait for an appointment for a sleep study. Ginger's story inspired me to do this.
Sept 18,2003
Feel sooo lucky. Just got a call from Angelia at Dr. Fang's Office. She said have a great weekend because you have been APPROVED!! Yipee!! That was fast. I was in the middle of trying to locate medical records to prove diet attempts. Not necessary now. Could be scheduled as soon as November. I am amazed. Thank you everyone. I am truly blessed. I hope everyone's journey is swift and uneventful as mine. Of course I realize this is only the beginning. Gotta go, think I am going to cry.
Sept 19,2003
Ok, so I got the great news. Now I am worried. Wednesday morning, I went through this really weird confusion thing and could not feel my left arm. Could not make it cooperate and felt nothing including slapping it, rubbing it etc. Went to my pcp. She thinks I could have had a mini-stroke. Went for cat scan yesterday and have not heard anything yet. Worried that this new development could hurt my chances for surgery. Taking an aspirin a day but have headache ever since. That was 40 hours ago.Husband is really worried. I know I need to let Dr. Fang know about it, but am afraid he won't touch me with a ten foot pole now. Been poked five times in two days as my veins are pretty bad. I always thought it was because there is too much fat around them. :) I just have poor veins. Even Dracula would give up on me.
Sept 20, 2003
Hi everyone, Headache is finally gone. Have not heard results yet from scan. No news is good news I hope. I came here today because I wanted to make a list of all the things I would like to accomplish after surgery. Here goes:
1)Wear sexy teddy for hubby
2)Look in the mirror and not get disgusted
3)Have the last laugh when hostess sits me in a booth at a restaurant
4)Ride bikes with my kids, this one makes me cry as I have never been able to do this (ridden but not with kids)
5) Walk with my family around a mall without having to stop for many breaks---DONE
6) Run with my kids while they are trying to fly kites
7) Have my three month old sit on my lap and actually have a "lap" to sit on---DONE
8) not be stared at by my childrens classmates when I come to their school
9) not to be the biggest person in a room or in our neighborhood
10) Cross my legs without assistance from my arms---DONE
11)shop for a new wardrobe without going to the "plus size section"
12) Scuba dive again
13) Ride a horse without the horse saying to himself,"OMG"
14) Do yard work without panting
15) Jump on a trampoline with my girls---DONE
16) Run with my girls in the "Turkey trot" at school and beat them or at least give them a run for their money
17) Not wake my poor husband up because I snore so loud--DONE
18) Clean house in one hour instead of all day
19) Bend over and tie my shoes instead of picking them up to cross over my knee and tie them sideways---DONE
20) Go camping and fishing without being winded----DONE
21) Be a size I used to wear while dating 7/8 or 10/12
22) Never be called thunder thighs or lard ass again
23) Do lap dance for husband without fear of crushing him
24) Fit in chairs with arms
25) Put seat belt on without feeling like I am being choked---DONE
26) plopping my butt anywhere without worrying if I am going to break the furniture
27) Use regular stalls in public bathrooms instead of waiting for the handicapped one--DONE
28) Riding the roller coaster or other fun ride at the fair--DONE--(see update Oct. 19 for this one)
29) Being able to hold my head up high when I walk into a room instead of wanting to dissappear
30) Do a kartwheel without falling flat on my face
31) Have my kids give me a hug and be able to reach all the way around--DONE
32) Do dishes without my back hurting after ten minutes
33) look at myself in the mirror and like what I see.
34) Not to have to worry about buying furniture (camping chairs)with weight restrictions
35) To not have to pay higher prices for plus size clothes
These are just a few that I could think of at the moment will post more later
Sept 21,2003 4:00 am
Thinking about my aunt that passed away this summer. She had a horse riding accident and hit her head. She was only 35 and 17 weeks pregnant. She survived for three weeks and then due to hospital neglect, died from punctured aorta. She never gained conciousness. I miss her every day. She left behind two teenage girls.
I guess I am thinking of my own mortality. How can I leave behind three young children? The thought of them having to grow up without me tears me apart. But with this new development with a possible mini stroke I had last week, how can I not have this surgery. I am trying to weigh the differences. I could die a slow and miserable death by being so out of shape, or have surgery, pray that I made the right decision and live a healthier more active life. To those of you who are undecided, take it slow,make your decision only after you have educated yourselves and then educate yourself even more.
Sept. 25, 2003
Well, I have a date. I hopefully will be having surgery on November 6 at St. Lukes in Phoenix. It is questionable at this time due to a positive cat scan. I had an MRI yesterday without contrast as they could not inject the medicine. My veins kept collapsing. I feel like a pin cushion. Thank you to all who e-mailed me with words of encouragement. You are truly a wonderful bunch of angels. I will stay positive. The only thing that really bothered me was that my pcp and her staff did not seem to take it seriously like I did. When I told one girl that the soonest I could get in for an MRI was next Tuesday, she said "that is fine". Fine for her maybe, but it is my head that we are talking about here. Anybody know a good pcp they can recommend? I am worried that after I have my surgery, my doc won't know possible complications and I will not get the care I need in the time that I need it. This has been a concern of mine before this new problem arose. Now it is even more so. Plus I was told by my insurance company, husband, and mother, that the doctors office should have been calling and setting up my MRI appointment, not me. I was doing the work that they are contracted to do. Funny, I don't remember getting a paycheck from them ;).
Oct. 11, 2003
Had an MRI last week with contrast. Nurse said it came out normal. Will see neurologist Tuesday to see exactly what that means. Got my papers yesterday for my pre-op testing. Less than a month away. Has not sunk in yet. I guess I don't want to get my hopes up until I see doctor on Tuesday. Surgery is scheduled first thing Thursday morning on the 6th of November.
Going to the State Fair today. Will be hard to resist all the wonderful fair food. Trying hard to eat better before surgery. I have had only one diet coke in about three weeks. I will bring my water bottle to the fair so I am not tempted to buy their pop. It is too expensive there anyway. Have a great weekend!
Oct 13, 2003
Went to the fair Saturday. Looked at the rides and kept thinking about how next year I will be able to join my children on them. Looked like so much fun.
Oct. 15, 2003
Received some dissappointing news yesterday. The second MRI I had came out normal. You would think that this would be good but it only confirmed what my pcp had suspected, a mini-stroke. Now the nuerologist wants to do a lumbar puncture to find out why as I am so young with not a lot of co-morbidities. He told me to hold off on my surgery. Very dissappointing. I am trying to stay positive but it is not easy. I had everything planned. My dad was coming in from Yuma to help with the kids, husband was taking that week off, etc..
Oct 17, 2003
Well, Just got off the phone with Pat at Dr. Fang's office. She is such a gem. She rescheduled my surgery until Dec 4th due to a mini-stroke I had a few weeks ago. I think I can handle that. She told me that if I needed anything to call her even if it is just for a little moral support. How many staff members of doctors offices do that??? Wow! Thanks Pat. I have waited this long (wanted it since last July) another month will be a breeze. One more turkey dinner at least. Will go to my dad's and savor some smoked breast with all the trimmings. I won't over do it as I have been trying to get ahead of the game before surgery. Hugs to all and best wishes. Keep the faith.
Oct. 22, 2003
I go in for a lumbar puncture this morning at 9:00am. Oh joy. I had one years ago in the ER and it was not too bad but I could think of other things that I would rather be doing. At least this should tell nuerologist what is happening in my bod so he can do what he has to do to fix it. Pray for me that it is not too serious so that I may still get re-born on Dec. 4th. Am not having anymore symptoms besides two episodes of short term memory loss. Maybe he'll say, "Go home, it was all in your head"LOL To everyone, god bless you no matter where you are in your journey.
Oct. 27, 2003
Hospital screwed up. They told me LP was scheduled for the 22nd. It was actually supposed to be on the 21st. Then they could not get me in until the 24th. That in turn forced me to re-schedule my nuerologist appointment until the 4th of November. Not a very happy camper. As far as the procedure goes, it was easier than giving blood. Honestly. Hurt no worse, just awkward for position. Boobs and butt falling out everywhere trying to get my big behind face down on the table. The tech was very professional though and made me feel right at ease. Thank you Peter. Now we wait and see. But hopefully not too long as I don't want to re-schedule again.
Oct 29,2003
I admit it. I am an addict to this site. So many people here that make you feel welcome and loved for who you are. To all of you, I thank you.
Nov. 6, 2003
Lumbar puncture is done and over with. No infection, no inflammation, still waiting on some results. Now Neurologist wants to do echocardiogram and blood clotting test. He will clear me for surgery so I (keeping fingers crossed ) will have surgery in less than a month. Have been pricing the special soap surgeon wants us to use. My Wal-mart does not carry it in stock but will special order it. It is about 5 or 6 dollars for 4 oz.
Nov. 19,2003
I had to get more blood drawn on Friday. I think it was the hardest draw I have ever had to do. Not that it hurt or anything but the poor women that had to do it were really having a tough time getting enough blood to fill all the containers. With as many containers they needed, I thought I was getting a transfusion. After the fourth poke, my body finally cooperated and let go of it's precious red stuff. Cripes, I hope it is not this hard to keep an IV in me for surgery. Tips for good blood flow, no caffeine three days prior, lots of water, and stay warm and toasty. At least I know there will be a very slim chance of me ever bleeding to death. LOL.
Nov. 24, 2003
Well. I have been cleared for surgery by my neurologist. Pat( from Dr. Fang's office) and I are playing phone tag. It is her turn now. I still need to be cleared by a cardiologist but I have recieved nothing in the mail to tell me who, when, where etc. Hopefully she will call me back today so we can do all the pre-op stuff tomorrow or by Wednesday. Looking at the nighties at Wal-mart Saturday but did not find what I wanted. All my nighties either have holes or are too short to walk the halls in. Don't think the other patients would appreciate me showing my granny panties off. Can't wait to be able to buy the pretty panty and bra sets. It will be hard making up my mind. Time is going by so fast. I know this Thanksgiving will fly by. I am thankful I have such a large and wonderful family. I am thankful that I have a second chance to become the healthy and attractive person that is trapped inside this huge body. I plan to follow my surgeons recommendations to the letter to give my new pouch time to heal and work the best for me. I promise not to abuse it and treat it with utmost care. I am thankful that I was blessed with three beautiful daughters, each with their own unique personality. I pray that they will grow up striving to be the best they can be. That is all I ask of them. I am thankful to my husband, a man I have loved for twenty years. A man that loves me and wants the best for me and our family. He is a hard worker and good provider. Without him, I do not think that I could survive. He completes me and I hope he knows how very, very much I love him.
I love you Babe, with all my heart.
Dec. 1, 2003
I found out Wednesday that I will not be having surgery as planned on Thursday. My surgeon will not do my surgery until my six month regimen of aspirin is up. My new date is on Monday the 15th of March. That seems so far away. To all who signed my surgery page, thank you.
Dec. 16, 2003
Not much new going on. Waiting for some sample shakes I ordered. I hope they come as my husband changed our computer and I have lost all my e-mails. For all of you that think I have ignored you, I am sorry but now have no way to reach you unless you e-mail me again. I have been pretty much down in the dumps lately since I found out that I can't have surgery until next year.
Dec. 31,2003
Good morning everyone. Hope everyone has a wonderful and safe New Years. We will be sitting out with the neighbors around a fire pit. Hopefully I can make it to midnight. Since my surgery has been put off, I have been turning to food, lots of it, for comfort. I even started drinking pop again. Not a lot but enough to be mad at myself. I have to get back on track. I feel like the goodyear blimp. Take care, and best wishes for the new year.
January 28, 2004
I have never admitted it out loud before. My daughter has tried to go to school without a lunch on several occasions. I am worried that she will get an eating disorder. I admitted to her about my own eating disorder. In the past I used to eat and then feel so full that I would purge myself to feel better. It started when I was twelve. I never did it on a continual basis like weeks at a time or such. Does that make it any less harmful? I don't do it anymore, at least a year. It is even hard to admit it to myself. My husband did not know until today.
February 26, 2004
Well, my pre op stuff is done. I had to do chest x-rays, ECG, breath into an incentive spirometer which they gave me to take home and practice.( This is to help prevent pnuemonia.)Upper GI, had to drink these citrus tasting rocks chased with barium. Found out I have reflux. Oh joy. Because I had to fast, the first three lab techs could not get any blood out of me. The fourth finally got it but only after six pokes and after my fasting tests were finished. Then I was able to drink so it plumped my veins back up. Blood gases were good. 98%. I think that is all of it, oh yeah, urine sample. Made for a long day though. To top it off, had to drive home in rush hour traffic.
March 23,2004
Hello. Some tragic news hit us recently. Surgery postponed.
We love you Mike.
We knew little that morning
That God was going to call your name.
In life we loved you dearly.
In death we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
You did not go alone,
For part of us went with you,
That day God called you home.
You left us great memories,
Your love is still our guide;
And though we cannot see you,
You are always at our side.
Our family chain is broken,
And nothing seems the same,
But as God calls us one by one
The chain will link again.
April 7, 2004
Well this is the last time I will be updating my profile until after surgery.
I had a filter inserted today. Piece of cake. Met a lot of wonderful nurses. One who had surgery herself six years ago. Loved her and wanted to take her home with me.
I am very calm going into this. I know in my heart I will be all right. I wish I could convince my husband. He is having feelings of dread and impending doom. I am doing this to become healthier. To do the things I have missed out on in the last twelve years. I don't want to be in pain anymore when doing dishes or simple things like sitting on the floor. I want to run with my kids and chase them and even better be able to let them chase me. I will be fine. Love you all, Best wishes, Barb
April 11, 2004
Hoppy Easter!!
I made it!! I have had zero complications, knock on wood. Most everything went fine. For the most part, the nursing staff was fantastic. Especially Gracie and Shannon. Only one nurse did not seem too interested to do her job. She could not get my boots working so she gave up, spilt my ice chips and did not clean them up or offer to get me more. When it was pointed out to her from another nurse that they had spilled, she did not even acknowledge that she was the one who did it. I have to say that she was nice though. The only time I felt she did not like me was when I asked her for more chips. She looked at me blankly, walked out, brought more chips without saying a word. Oh well. My room mate was also nice but was a pig. For ex: we did not have a trash can in our bathroom. They were just too small. So instead of taking it out of the bathroom, she would just dump her trash on the floor. Her family was also loud. At one point during the night, I had my TV on loud so I would not have to hear her and her boyfriend kissing. I am not a prude. I just don't want to hear people getting it on with only a sheet to divide us. The nurse kicked the boyfriend out of bed and the girl went to surgery the next day. She was not a bypass patient.
Dr. Fang came in the next morning, said I looked great.(I had applied some make-up to make me feel better.) Told me surgery went well and I could probably go home Saturday.
The worst part I think was waking up in recovery, moaning and groaning that I was sick to my stomach. My IV went bad after surgery so the nurses were trying their best to get another one going so they could give me something to ease my stomach and something for pain. I did not even realize until the next day how many times I got poked until seeing several band-aids all over my arms and wrist. I have found 6 holes so far. I am ok though and each day is getting better.
One thing I did not anticipate was the gas pain I had yesterday. I refused the suppository at the hospital and drank prune juice when I got home. I finally got some relief last night.
I am so looking forward to being healthy, doing things I have been unable to do for years. At this moment if someone asked if I would do it again, Oh yeah, in a heartbeat. Best wishe to all in your own journey. I will pay it forward as much as I can. Love you all.
April 20, 2004
Wow. I can't believe how much energy I had yesterday. I felt better than I have probably in the last two years. It took me most of the day, but I got my daughter's room clean. Funny how many things I found that I have been missing. Tape, scissors, baby's slipper, nail clippers etc...It really needed a good cleaning months ago but I never had the energy or drive to do it. Daughter helped when she got home from school. She is a packrat that tries to save EVERYTHING. It just feels good to be able to do it. I am so glad I had this surgery. Life is good and getting better day by day. Best wishes.
April 30,2004
I have lost 27 lbs. so far as of Tuesday this week. Feels great minus some mild nausea. Probably the chicken wing I tried to eat without skin. Cleared for pureed for the next three weeks. Then onto real food. Have not started exercising yet. I think I get enough chasing the baby. I can resume normal activities now. Already had. Fitting into clothes I have not worn in years. I feel this surgery has possibly saved my life. I feel so much better than I have in a long long time.
July 8, 2004
Three month anniversary!! According to my scale here at home, I have lost 57 lbs. Made a pact with my daughters this morning to exercise five days a week to one or more of my workout videos. Have had a lot more energy and feel great. Went camping this weekend and hiked half way around the lake. Amazed myself.
August 11,2004
Well, I know I am succeeding at this surgery as my daughter hugged me the other day, stood back and said "MOM! I can hug all the way around you now" I hope she knows how much that meant to me. Thanks sweetheart. Down 75 lbs.
Sept. 9, 2004
5 monthes and 1 day with a total loss so far or 82lbs. This month has been really slow for me. Dissappointed but not beaten yet. I know I am losing inches still as my shorts need belts now. And it hurts my butt to sit too long in a hard chair. No more padding. Isn't that great!!
On a more sobering note, to all the victims and their families of 9/11, we will never forget. May you find peace and comfort.
Oct 19,2004
Hi everyone. Down 92 lbs. so far. Feeling great and no complications except most of my clothes are swimming on me. Went to the fair this weekend and finally rode a fun ride with my kids. Bars were snug but they fit. WOW!! Husband has not stopped laughing as my shirt creeped lower and lower as well as my bra. To make a long story short, I showed more than cleavage. Noticed by many people. Very embarrassing!
Jan 4,2005
Happy New Year Everyone!! Hope all of you enjoyed the holidays. May this new year bring many happy memories to you and yours.
I'm down to 199 so far. 108 lbs. gone. My scale is not very reliable so it jumps up and down a little but I'm still pleased. I don't get all upset if it shows a gain. I just put it back under the cupboard and try again the next day. No biggie. Getting lots of compliments. Hard to accept sometimes, I just smile graciously and say thank you. Clothes are all getting too big. Luckily my mom is losing weight too so she gives me all the clothes that are too big for her. Works out great for me. Only thing I have noticed lately is that my right shin is numb. I guess I'll call the doctor and see what that may be about. Read the Q&A and it could possibly be from B1 or B12 vitamin deficiency. I don't take any of those. Maybe I should.
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