Second thoughts!! Am I crazy or just female?

Hey guys, I'm sorry to be a downer but has anyone else felt feelings of "Am I doing the right thing?" syndrome closer to their surgery date? Or being a chicken..Ok, so I'm a little scared. I've already had my pre-op on Friday. Which went fine, except for the fact that I came down with the flu !!! Getting better by the way or else no surgery on the 13th (this is what my primary docs tells me). I know it's crazy but this is how I feel. If I could just fast forward everything to the day of. Anybody?

Fighting the flu will get you down and give you time to think too much anyway. I became more nervous as time drew near as well. Kept asking myself why I wanted to go through surgery when basically I felt like a normal/well person...and surgery is supposed to be for sick people, right? Then I would remind myself that I came too far to back out now. I also reminded myself of everyone I had confided in that I was having surgery, who were supporting my decision and I didn't want to let any of us, including myself, down. So I kept my eye on the prize and kept reading positive profiles of others who went before me. Focus ONLY on the positive. Take care! Sandy L

I too had second thoughts right before my surgery date of 1/23. It is normal to be scared but you have to think of the "big picture". It will all be worth it in the end!!!! When you are healthier and happier after the surgery. You will even have a period after the surgery -like what did I do to myself!! But it will pass and the light at the end of the tunnel will soon appear. Remember-you are worth it!!! Hang in there and good luck with your surgery. Lisa

I had Lap RNY on 1/23 and also went back and forth before surgery on whether or not I was doing the right thing. I think we all do that. I am two weeks out now and down 20 lbs since surgery. Everything is going great, am off my blood pressure meds and looking forward to losing weight and becoming healthier and more active! This is not an easy decision, I know, so good luck with whatever you decide. Sylvia

Hi Jesse- I too had second thoughts ( and third ones....and forths). In fact, I wasn't sure I was really going to go through with it driving to the hospital that morning, I doubted it when I got the hospital gown on, and I know my surgeon (God Bless Him) knew I was scared and worried and doubting as I lie on the table with an IV in me an oxygen mask on. But, he grabbed my hand and looked in my eyes and said "You'll be fine". I know that helped, but truth be told, as I laid in bed after surgery and for the next few days, I had times when I thought "What did I just do?". I remember telling myself to think of something else (denial- I'm really good at that). I remember saying after surgery- I'm glad it's behind me, now I can stop beating myself up about whether to go through with it or not. But here we are, two weeks and 4 days later and I think "YES, of course I did that". It was the ABSOLUTE right decision for me. It is much easier now. The recovery is behind me and I'm developing a routine with proteins and liquids...and all is well. All is better than well, it's great! I have put pants on that I haven't in a year and everyday someone says to me that I'm looking great these days. Great because I'm loosing weight sure, but great also because I am SO happy with the decision that I almost didn't make. And today- I couldn't help but smile and laugh as I power walked to country music all the while imagining this summer finally not being ashamed of wearing a bathing suit. So don't worry Jesse, if I'm any indication of normal- then what you are going through is all very very normal. You'll do great! It's a wonderful investment you are making in the rest of your life. One that you will not regret- at least I don't. Promise. Hugs! Judie

I think it's completely normal to go through those feelings. I started going through them as soon as I was scheduled. The reality of the risks came into play and I went through a couple weeks where I was just crying over the possible risks and having nightmares, to the point that I almost gave up and cancelled. On top of that, something came up with my Doctor's office and they had to cancel my surgery 3 days before. So right away I'm thinking "this was not meant to be". But then others shared their feelings and I realized that I was so focused on being afraid, I wasn't seeing the big picture. I wasn't seeing that reality that those same risks are there if I don't have the surgery. I still think about it once in a while, but I'm not constantly focused on it and I feel better. Also, I don't know if you are getting this at all, but it seemed that whenever I told someone about my surgery, they immediately responded with "oh I know someone who had bad complications from that surgery", and that didn't help me either, so I stopped telling people. People sometimes just don't understand, even family sometimes. I told my uncle what I was doing and he proceeded to tell me about a "dateline" special he saw about how bad this surgery was. He didn't even pay attention to the special, didn't know the facts, didn't even know what surgery I was having, just that it was for weightloss. So again, just try to put it in the back of your mind. Focus on all the things you have not been able to do. I am rescheduled for February 17th and I have already planned my vacation for this summer knowing I'll be able to feel good about myself and do things like walk around an amusement park (something I can't do right now because of my weight). I am looking into snowboarding lessons with my daughter and might even try rock climbing. Hope that helps a little, good luck and you know you can always come here for help if you need it Roni