New bodies, new minds, and maybe dating???

OK ladies (and a few guys that come visit us).... We have taken the steps to get healthy and have regained control over our weight and out lives. We are in the process of making some big changes in our lives. Many of us have mentioned that we have a new sense of self-esteem and that we are learning to find peace within our own skin. And some of us (including me) have even mentioned that we have raging hormones from the release of estrogen from the stored fat. With all of these thngs going on.... has any of the single girls thought about or have already started dating again? I am at the point now where I am looking to start dating and get out there and meet people. I have 2 friends that are going to try things out with me and see if we can meet people (FYI... Pittsburgh is HORRIBLE to try and meet new people in!! LOL) and jump back into the dating game. So if you have jumped back in, how did you do it and where did you start? If you have not, are you planning on it? Are you feeling the need to start dating again? My friends and I have talked about this for a few weeks now and we spent 3 hours talking about it over dinner and coffee last night. I just wanted a fresh and unbiased opinion on this issue. Thanks everyone!! Best wishes for a bright day -- ~amber~

3 times Bitten 6 times shy No Way Ho Say If it weren't for bad luck with the opposite sex I'd have no luck at all. Maybe someday, but not for right now, I need some me time first. I give you all the credit for getting back on the saddle again But you go girl April

Hey April!! Oh I know all about bad luck.... the funny thing is that I am very outgoing and have no issues making friends, but once I find someone I like, I am sooooooo incredibly shy!!! I need to get over that and somehow break that pattern. Thanks for the support and you will get out there soon enough! When you do, I got your back!! Have a great one -- ~amber~

I am starting to get into dating again. I've had a few recent dates with nice people but nothing that had sparks or excitment. Except this man I met while in Berlin, but he lives in Istanbul which is a long way to go for a date. We had a 2 hour conversation FULL of chemistry!!! I have had a profile on bbpeopleonline.com since October and am considering removing it. Its a site for larger people and that's not how I want to market myself any longer. While still obese myself (but not for much longer) I shy away from obese men. It sounds harsh but I'm getting my act together and dont want someone who has the problems I am overcoming. This site does have men who are just incredibly tall and not overweight. Having said that, my profile on cupid.com gets traffic but responses are not from the people I desire; often I am eliminated for being larger. Soon that will change. eHarmony was the most interesting and emotionally scarring to me years ago; you get into really detailed discussions about values, life priorities and then when pictures are exchanged the person deletes you....or at least they delete me. I have hopes for the ole fashioned way of bumping into someone and there's chemistry; maybe Reggie will go up and sniff his butt at the park. Introductions from friends are either hit or miss (one person set me up with a crossing guard, did not get that at all). My picture has recently been in a lot of travel industry press and part of me hopes the man of my dreams will see it and seek me out. HA! Its never that easy!! I am picky and tend not to put time in when I dont feel chemistry or friendship. Excuses... But those hormones are raging and something needs to be done! Tiffany

Hi Tiffany! I too have had very mixed results with online dating. I have had profiles on Match.com, eHarmony, and most recently plentyoffish.com ... I know the feeling of being excluded because of size. It's funny. Guys say they are looking for a real, honest girl yet when you are honest about your weight, they run and don't even want to give you a chance. I have met people from match.com but it went absolutely nowhere and I really don't want to go down that road again. But then again, my sister just met a fantastic guy off match.com and she is very happy. I also do not "prefer" bigger guys. Being short, most guys are taller than me. But "teddy bear" guys are good for me. Not bigger guys, but average size guys. I dated one of my friends that was a short and skinny guy and quite honestly, it made me quite uncomfortable sometimes. I always worried about what he was thinking of my size and weight. Maybe that's an outcome of me having no self-esteem and whatnot. I want to meet that one as well. Strangely, most of my friends don't have single guy friends that they would set me up with. HA! Maybe that's a good thing. I don't drink (and now, really can't drink) and just quit smoking right before the surgery, so going out to the bars is not really appealing. I don't like going to clubs because I still feel very uncomfortable around itty-bitty 21 year olds. I want to find the one the old-fashioned way, but maybe I can bide my time by finding Mr. Right Now.... I just found out that my ex, yes the one I was with on and off for 9 years, got married last September.... to the high school sweetheart.... ugh.... but as I finally realized, that was my last "safety net" and I no longer have anything holding me back. It will be 2 years since we split in June. I need someone new to concentrate on.... LOL May love find us all!! ~amber~ : sexy:

Good luck jumping in the dating pool!! I guess I'm lucky (or maybe my husband isn't so much) that I just take out my raging sex hormones on him...poor guy, I bet he never thought he married someone so wild. Dawn

Hi Amber! Yes, the hormones are raging! This past weekend I was like a kid in a candy store! LOL I have never been so interested in all of the male showmen at Great Western before, let alone the hog showmen! My show buddies also saw the difference... they'd be talking about how cute this one guy was and I'd be all no, he's HOT! lol I would love to go on a date! I've never been on a date, been kissed, in a relationship- anything. So I'm actually quite nervous as to what to do. Sure, I've had crushes before, but those ended badly since those guys loved the itty bitties. So when the time comes for a date, I'm posting to this group for some advice! LOL This weekend, I made a point to hang with the "itty bitty party girls" in my show team and we went to this BBQ place Big Bad Bubba's BBQ that had a mechanical bull, dancers, loud music and a bar. The place was wonderful! These girls danced and danced and I watched in amazement. The next night we went somewhere else and I felt much more comfy and actually had them rolling in stitches. I guess we all have our way of having fun *~*Jaci*~*

OMGosh!!! RE: "And some of us (including me) have even mentioned that we have raging hormones from the release of estrogen from the stored fat." That explains sooooooooooo much. THANK YOU! I started a profile on Myspace. (You can link to it from my profile) The reason I like it is because you can just talk with people and if you wish find people local to you, you can. You can tell alot about someones profile as you can view all their friends as well as a dozen pics of them and their hobbies, whatever. I had a really bad reaction to a relationship I was forming on line. We were not dating he lives far away, but I was allowing myself to have feelings and I had to call that to a stop becasue it was ridiculous to have feelings like that on many different levels, FOR ME. (because of those damn hormones, but the dude understood and we still talk). Anyway, my point being that it will at least give you some practice LOL and people approach you regularly. Trust me. So it's not going to get deleted or thrown away. In fact the same thing I had posted in my profile here at OH was on my myspace profile for quite some time in blog form and a ton of people read it and still responded. So don't be shy when it comes to dating. Do whatever you are comfortable with. I am not a bar scene person and I never will be. I have no idea how I will meet my match someday, I just go with the flow. *shrugs* Best of luck on your "NEW" adventure. ~Kristie