When will my brain catch up?

I have been doing awful lately. You know what I mean, all the negative talk! Telling myself how horrible I look and how huge I am and I will never be thin....but I will be bald soon at this rate! Pretty picture huh? Well today @ Walmart I was standing in line to return something and I looked up at the TV screen on the wall. It was showing a girl standing there and I thought to myself, "Will I ever look like that, NORMAL?" About that time my DH shows up on the screen and I realize its a monitor and HOLY COW, that girl is ME!?! What, how could that be me? Cause when I look in the mirror I see a 317 pound girl. So, is anyone else having this problem, or as usual is it just me? LOL hugs, kristi