Whats wrong with me! What the heck am I doing?? Help!!

Katt,

I think we're in the minority but having honorary sisters and brothers works doesn't it?

Welcome to the honorary sister society GF.  Best of luck with your job search, I am keeping good thoughts and saying prayers for you too.

Hugs

Barb

I sometimes theink Honorary Brothers and Sisters are better that blood...lol I have a friend. We met in 7th grade and have been BFFs ever since. I consider her kids my niece and nephew. I grew up with 7 honorary brothers and 5 honorary sisters. It was great! I was the youngest of all of them. If anyone wanted to get to me, they'd have to go thru about 6 other people first. Needless to say, I was well protected. lol

Michelle, I know how hard it  is to be the "DUFF" (designated ugly fat friend). I was that most of my life. I was always the one the guys never wanted to date, but wanted me to help them with their love life. I lost a friend when I lost 60 pounds. She couldn't deal with the fact that she may now have to "compete" with me for guys attention. WTF?? I am married. And besides, I've never had to compete for a guys' attention. I attract them with my personality and how I carry myself.

If you really don't want her to go with you to the consult, I am in Fontana and would love to ride down with you. After all, I am a Zorn baby too and we need to stick together. Chin up honey. Don't beat yourdelf up about the pizza. Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start over. It's never too late. Sending love and hugs. xoxoxo

Thank you Katt,

I really appreciate your offer. I have to stop in Fontana Monday morning, as my husband has an eye appt at 7am. If you would like to join us for the drive down, just PM me either here or on facebook and we can meet up.
I hate being the DUFF. She is also very competitive and outspoken. Moody as all get out. I am trying to get it off  my mind today with a couple of laps around my complex, a good friend recommended that would get my mind off things. It sure is hot, Lol! I appreciate your words of wisdom. I will try my best. Have a great day, Katt! Hugs and friendship back at you!

 

 

 

Michelle,
You came to the right place with your questions and heartaches. This is one place where you will get good honest answers from people who can feel your pain. One thing you can be sure of is the people you meet on OH are and will be your friend through thick and thin.

I say you go with Katt, she has offered and would love to go with you as well. It never hurts to make more friends.. Besides as far as the pizza goes, we all have/had our food issues and can relate. Good thing is you noticed it and why it happened now you can work on controlling it better. That will be much easier once you have your surgery. You have come too far to give up now.  I must tell you your story brought tears to my eyes, I can surely relate to life as a fat person and friend.. You need to do what is right for you and for your health.  Hang in there and clean up those old friendships that remain due to convenience and not honesty or love.. Lori W 

Hi Lori,

Thank you for your help. I did decide to go with Katt. She will be joining me on Monday. I am a firm believer that you can never have to many friends, and I for one, always welcome new friends.

I am going to try to remain strong and honest with myself about this friendship. I can not be having it bring me down. I will just see what happens after surgery.

Hugs,

 

Hi Michelle,

I would love to go with you, but I am with major issues myself right now medically.  You have a ton of advise that everyone has given you on here, and you need to take some of it.  Get rid of that user friend...no matter who she is.  Everything in life, now I know it's hard to accept, should be about you, what you decide to do about surgery is about you, no one else.  Best thing I ever did, never regret it, never would want to go back to where I was.  Wish I had done it years ago.  This surgery is your choice, so don't listen to others, it will just increase as your day gets closer.  Everyone here is a great group of peoplethat will support you no matter.  Everyone has had a friend like yours, been through the non support crap, and tried to fill our heads about we can do it on our own.  Next time someone tells you that, tell them, if you could, don't you think you would have done it a long time ago.  It's not always about overeating, but the world is stupid and that is what they tend to think.

Wishing you the best and we are all out here to help you

Diane

Michelle,
Gotta add my .2 cents worth....
The "friend", 17 years is a long time to be beaten down with attitude, bossiness and being used. Move on before you have to tell her you liked her better when you were fat.Nuf said.
Husbands are weird. Sounds like he's willing to go with you to your doc. appt. Thats huge.
And Katt going with you is a great way to meet a knew friend and get rid of an old one.
And hey, I have eaten a whole pizza all by myself too! Move on and don't beat yourself up too bad. LOL.
I'm happy you're here with us. I  believe you are with people who know what it feels like to be in your shoes.
Kathleen

Hi Michelle,

I had some freak out moments myself before surgery and as I am in my 5th week post surgery, I still have freak out moments. I am sorry your mom is so unsupportive.  If she really believes you can't stick with the restrictions post-surgery, there are so many better ways to support you than just saying "You can't stick with the restrictions."  I have a family that thinks they're supportive, but they're not.  Their support comes from harsh tongues.  It's like they have to slap me first and than show kindness.  This has never inspired me to lose weight.

I think venting here is a great idea! You will get appropriate support here.  What I've found with this surgery is I can't do what I used to do when I am stressed or just feeling down.  I have to use other tools instead of having a munch fest on my couch.  I am struggling because I have to sit with my emotions.  That is not an easy thing to do, but venting and talking about it is so much better than the food. I do miss it though, SIGH!

Keep up the good work with venting. We'll all here for you.

Ms.Blues