Overwhelmed by Mom's Cancer News

Hi all,

I know many other people have had to watch a family member go through the emotional roller coaster of cancer, but this is a first for me.  I received news today that my mom's cancer has manifested into something new and mysterious. At first she had stage IV uterine cancer. Through two surgeries, chemo and radiation, she beat it back for 2.5 years.  Then it came back a few months ago in the form of two tumors.  In July she started chemo, but she noticed another bump protruding from her abdomen. Now chemo has been stopped and a battery of tests ordered. It's most likely a rare form of cancer called soft tissue sarcoma.  The two other tumors are there, but they haven't grown. 

I think the worst part is just not knowing. Having to wait for test results and decisions on treatment is torture for me. My mom seems much more patient than me.  I don't live well with open ended situations. I want to see the clear path so I can plan and know what to expect.  I have to say though, the last round of treatments taught me to live life on a day to day basis.

I think my biggest challenge is making sure I prioritize what's important (that means my job should take a back seat to my mom), stick to my post WLS life, seek out emotional relief that doesn't involve food, and be absolutely kind to myself.

Thanks for listening.

MsBlues

I am sorry for your news.  I will pray that things will get better. 

I think you should change your priorities though.  Take care of you first seek out emotional relief that does not involve food, stick to your post WLS life and be kind too yourself, then you can take care of your mom the best way possible and then your job.  That is my opinion. 

I am wishing you the best and sending prayers and hugs your way!

Rhonda

MsBlues -

I am sorry to hear of this news you received.  I will keep you and your mom in my prayers tha all will turn out well.

I have to agree with Rhonda though on your priorities.  If you don't take care of you first, you can't take care of anything else.  Of course, your mom will ALWAYS come before work.

God Bless, and keep us posted

Annette

I'm so sorry that you and your mother are having to go through this.  I wish I had some words of wisdom.  All I can offer is my prayers and an ear if you need to talk.  Hang in there and keep us posted about what's going on please.

I am so sorry to hear about your mother and everything you are going through.  I will keep you and your family in my prayers.  As the other ladies have said...of course you mother is you number one priority, but if you don't take care of yourself you are useless!!!

One of the best support I have found for just about anything is here on this site.  I know I can come here and ask or say anything and not be judged.

Take care of yourself and if you ever need a....just send me a PM...I am here to listen!!!

May God be with you and your family during this time of need.

Hugs, Michele

MsBlues,

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Mom.  I know what you are going through, just take things one day at a time and as Rhonda and others have said, try to take care of yourself and get the emotional support you need.  Your job will always be there.

Hugs my friend,
Barb

I am so sorry to hear that your mom is not doing well....I had so hoped that the new treatments would beat back the cancer once again.  You MUST take care of yourself first...you're mom will understand and know that if you don't,you can't be of any help to her.  I have no great words of wisdom to give you...but know that here is the 'safe' place to talk about anything...emotions, uncertainties, etc.  PM someone if you feel more comfortable (me included!)...we want to give you any support that we can.  You and your family will be at the top of my daily prayer list...especially that you find some peace and consolation in this trial.
{{{Hugs}}}
Nancy aka Sunray

Thanks so much for all your kindness. I am taking one day at a time and I promise to make taking care of myself the top priority. You're all correct that I need to be healthy to help out my mom and deal with the rest of my family. 

I know my mom wants me to stick with becoming healthy so I'd actually be honoring her in making sure I use my RNY tool.

I have to run and work!

Thanks again for the support,

MsBlues

My brother passed away in Feb of 2001.  He had turned 50 on Dec. 26, 2000.  It is the hardest thing to watch your loved one dying.  My brother was a great person.  He never complained and was more worried about us than himself.  I agree you have to take care of yourself first, and when she wants to talk or go down memory lane let her, it may be hard for you but she needs to do it.  I will keep you and your mother in my prayers.  I hope they can find something to help her.

Msblues, I am so sorry that you are faced with this awful situation. I can totally relate to what you are going through. My father passed away at home in March of 1999 of colon cancer. We went through the chemo and trials. We had done everything we could. In 1996, I was diagnosed with soft tissue sarcoma, which settled behind my eyes. I went through tests and biopsies. Chemo, trials, oral medications, eventually I lost my left eye to a total enuclation (removal). I then had to go through the radiation treatments. That was in 2001. I thought I was free and clear, until I was told I had cervical cancer in 2004, here I went again with surgeries and medications. I was able to do the chemo through pills this time. Last year, 2008, I had a cancerous growth removed from my right leg near my knee. Cancer runs rampant in my family and I am a proud cancer champion. I live each day to the fullest and try to look for the positive in my life. I try to be a positive role model for everyone and encourage people to be the best they can be.
I didn't mean to, in any way make what you are going through less, but I just want to say, like your mom... sometimes patience is the key and to have a positive attitude. What you say in your head is half the battle. As everyone else said take care of yourself and keep up on you. That way you can help your mom and the rest of your family. Your mom sounds like a strong woman. And I will continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Major hug, lotsa love, & total friendship,