Where am I in 2005???

**WARNING*** VERY LONG POST... lol This is a response to JA's post but I really wanted to share it with everyone and didn't want it to get lost in the shuffle..... so forgive me as I bare my soul. Last year at this time I was contemplating surgery and had an appointment to see Dr. Aranow. I was in a relationship with a great guy who was dead against me having surgery so to make a long story short I ended that pretty quick. I was very close to 400 lbs and going downhill fast. I had a very stressful and unhealthy job. I decided to take men totally out of my life for once and do something for myself. I tend to give so much of myself in relationships that there is nothing left for myself. My health was deteriorating very fast... couldn't walk without pain, my back problems were at there all time worst, asthma and breathing problems were hitting me full force and the fluid rentention in my legs, ankles and feet were very severe. Now I am over 100 lbs lighter weighing in at 280... -90 lbs since surgery. My asthma has gotten so much better. I no longer am on 4 breathing treatments a day. I rarely have to use my inhaler. Now I am coming to a point where a man may be let in and it scares me a little. I do notice however that my standards are very high now and I will never settle in any part of my life I don't know why but there is so much I tolerated for years that now I won't. My back problems were not as bad for a while but recently have reserfaced and I am dealing with that, taking one day at a time. I thank God every day that I do not have to endure as much pain as I did when I had an additional 120 lbs on my body. I now get to enjoy the Loves of my Life (my 4 neices and 1 nephew) I no longer have to make up excuses as to why Auntie Jay can't go out somewhere. I can actually walk places and go out in public without that fear of looks, stares or ridicule. I have a lap now woohoooo....where my neices/nephew can come sit with me without slipping off. I have an awesome job that I love. I can say I am in a much better place now than last year. Minus of course the tragedies and losses my family has had to endure. I have very high hopes for 2005 for myself, my family and all of you. I am so thankful to have found all you and hope to get to meet everyone very soon. To all who are thinking about having WLS.... this is a decision that only you can make and if you have any questions or concerns please feel free to ask them either on the board or email someone directly. I am an open book so ask away. This was the most important decision I have made in my life and no one should take it lightly. I Wish You All the best of Luck, Health and Happiness in 2005. Happy New Year to everyone!!!!!! ~Julie~ Open RNY 8/9/2004 370/280/150

To Ja and Julie I remember I cannot breath normal when I used the stairs up to fourth floor from work and was breathing heavy. Every morning I woke up, I felt aches in my chest and feel lousy. I always feel so tired and don t feel good. I always worried about where I will sit when I go out because I hate booth seat. It won't fit my stomach. After I had this surgery, I cannot tell you how I feel so great. I can go up the stairs without have hard time to breath, can get up without holding things , I slept so good and woke up every morning feeling great. I am not tired anymore and feel so engery. I do have more motive for excercise and enjoy to have sweaty all over my body while excercise. I love my life now and do not want to go back! Julie, I never forget when I first met you last March at Gathering party and I am so happy you feel much better and enjoy your life now. You will know if the right guy will come into your life. Time will tell you . Make goal to go a vacation like cruise or warmer weather for your reward 1 year anniversary since you had this surgery. JA I am so glad you feel better from your health. We all do and we know it is not easy way to have this surgery but it is worth to all of us. I hope to see you at Heather's babyshower party Take care HUGS Kathy K

Julie your story is so touching and familiar. We can all relate in one way or another, I am sure. The best part about WLS for me is that I have gained a family of friends here online. That is just awesome! Keep up the good work, and I hope we can all meet you one of these days! JA

Well said Julie Happy New Year!!!! Darlene

Julie~ Good for you! Sometimes you have to step away from the dating scene to concentrate on yourself, especially if you put alot of energy into relationships. Keep your standards high because you deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. I've been in 'relationships' in the past where I would let guys use me because I had bad self esteem and was craving any form of attention. I finally said the heck with dating and was single for 3 years before I met my husband in 2001. So, keep on doing for you and your neices and nephew and when you aren't looking the right guy will come out of nowhere. I swear, it happened to me. Hugs~ Stacey

Hi Stacey Great Picture !! SMILE!! You looks great and beautiful inside and outside. cannot wait to meet you someday! Kathy K

Kathy K~ Thank you for the compliment. I'm hoping to go to the bowling outing in Newington in Feb. Maybe if the weather is good you can make it. Keep losin'~ Stacey

Julie, I read your post and it brought tears to my eyes, I remember all the family struggles you've had in your life and the inner strength you had then. I read how life is for you now and can't think of anyone that deserves happiness more than you. You've hung in there through thick and thin. (pun intended) I also know of Natasha's struggles and continue to be amazed by her strength and determination as well. I wish you both could pass some to me! I have my own mountains to conquer in this new year and I can only pray I can learn from both of you and Maggie and Kathy K and B and Linda to get me through them. It truly is amazing what you can do with a little trust in friends a lot trust in a higher power than all of us!! I wish you the best 2005 can bring, love Cheryl

Cheryl, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind words. I really do appreciate it. I will pray that your 2005 is a blessed year and you have the strength and courage to get through all that is in store for you. ~Julie~