Believe it or not, it doesn't seem to matter where you are in this journey, we seem struggle with developing a positive self image. I knew that I could be harsh with myself when I was large, but I was surprised that I seem to be harder on myself the smaller I got. I was more focused on the imperfections. As a matter of a fact, as we get smaller, it's not unusual for us to be MORE critical of our bodies, rather than more accepting. I think that for me, this is in part because I realize that I have 'done it to myself' when I see the extra skin. That said, I think it's important to not only appreciate the health aspects of our metamorphosis, but to also appreciate the positive changes in our physiques. So I'd like you to tell me at least one thing, and hopefully more, that you LIKE about your body now, no matter where you are in your journey. This is not about bragging. This is about really trying to see the positive in where you are. To be honest, it was harder for me than I thought it would be, but it's something I'm going to try to practice to see if it will help me become more comfortable with who I am now and what I look like. 

There are plenty of things that I like about how my body works, but these are the things about how my body looks. I like my

- slender frame

- the shape of my face... It's oval and I always thought is was round

- my feminine shape

- the length of my neck... I never realized I had a neck before!

- collar bones

- waist

Please tell me some things you like about your body now... 

I HAD MY SURGERY 5 MONTHS AGO IM STRESSING BECAUSE ...I GAINED 4 THAN LOST 4 THAN GAIN THE 4 LB BK... HAVE ANY ONE HAD THIS PROBLEM BEFORE... I NEED TO KNOW PLEASE ...IF SO WHAT SHOULD I DO

 People overeat and stuff themselves in order to feel good.  It's the pleasure factor that we are all after when we eat.  When we stuff ourselves or give ourselves sweets, we actually are feeding the hormones in our body that give us pleasure sensations and those are the same sensations we get when we feel loved.  We are as addicted to that sensation whenever we choose to overeat, get drunk or take drugs.  All of them give us pleasure and all of us are seeking it.  People just don't understand that food is an addiction just like alcohol and drugs.    I personally realized that I was stuffing myself because I never had the love of my parents.  My mother abandoned me because she chose to be an alcoholic and my father chose to love his second wife more than me and I ended up living with friends and other relatives all of my life.  My father died when I was 15 and my mother died when I was 20.  I harbored anger and bitterness towards them all of my life and chose to 'fill that void' with food because it made me feel good like being loved feels good.  When I realized that fact, it helped me deal with the whole overeating issue itself.  When I chose to forgive my parents and love them despite their failures, the desire to overeat went away.  Granted, the surgery happened before I did that and the weight came off but I've managed to overcome the 'food is my life' issue because I chose to forgive.   See, when you think about it, the people who have surgery are forced to first drink liquids the first week.  Then they graduate to more solid liquids the second week.  Then they graduate to soft foods after that and eventually get to regular food but in small increments from then on.  If you stop and think about it, if a person would eat like that without surgery they would lose just as much weight as if they didn't have the surgery in the first place.   People regain their weight because they never dealt with the issue of why they overate in the first place.  They thought that the surgery would cure the whole fat issue and it doesn't.  They learn how to graze all day or stretch their pouch back out and then wonder why they've regained most or all of their weight.    A person's weight issue will never be solved with surgery.  It can only be cured by finding out why you are overeating and deal with that first and then learn to LISTEN to your body and only eating WHAT and WHEN it wants to eat.  People think that 'mouth hunger' is real hunger but it isn't.  Overweight people usually don't know what it's like to feel a hunger pain because they don't get to that point.  Food is their life.  They live to eat instead of eating to live.  No one really realizes how little food the body needs for fuel each day.    If you ask me if I would have had the surgery again, I would tell you no.  Most WLSers aren't that way.  I would have chosen to cure myself mentally first and then listened to my body and learned what it really wanted and when it wanted it instead of just throwing food down it when I saw a commercial or smelled food cooking.    I don't know what decision is best for you but I do know that you must love yourself enough to cure the inside before you cure the outside, however you choose to do that is up to you.  

Yoli,

I am having the same surgery on July 26th. Would love to keep in touch with someone that has just recently been through the surgery. I may have a lot of questions afterwards and I believe you just may be able to help me.

Thanks,

Anna