3 years ago tomorrow.....

I lost my dad... the worst day of my life. He was 47 and died from pulmonary embolism. He had been mis diagnosed the day before with bronchitis... How in the hell do you mistake PE for freaking bronchitis??? I miss my dad so much... my older 2 boys remember him but my youngest son was so young when dad died that he doesnt remember him. My daughter was born after dad died and I named her after him.... he would be so proud of all 4 of my munchkins.... They were cheated out of having him around and getting to know him and it really ticks me off. Everyone told me that it would get easier but it never has... its still rough and it still sucks. I cant go to the cemetary by myself and I havent been there much lately either. Its so hard.... I have picked up the phone to call dad to tell him something goofy the kids have done and then realize that I cant...its been 3 freakin years why hasnt this gotten any easier????

Sarah sorry that you are having a rough one right now,but you have been through one of the roughest things that we have to go through....I have both of my parents and everyday when i here something like this i think.......what would i do with out them..You have such a loving family and all of you seem so happy...you are in my thoughts and prayers through this day................vickie

Thanks, I do have a great family but its not the same without him yanno. My boys loved wrestling around with him... and the holidays.... always a blast at dads house. I should probably post a pic...

Ok girl... I know Mark is still around you...I have felt him around me...And even though we had been divorced a long time, you know how much I loved him...I miss him too...We couldn't stay married but we stayed good friends...He was a lot of fun (N THAT) I don't think it gets easier, I think we just cope...Without him...I wouldn't have the three wonderful kids I have....I see him in all of you...Mason never knew him...but he is definately his clone...Next time I see you...we need a hug... I Love You Mom

I know he's around... just not physically... i miss the goofy comments... on occasion my boys do fill in for him. "hey mom ONEST upon a time" lmfao no one else that reads this will get the whole "onest" thing but you know exactly what im talking about. Anyway I cant get too in depth with this because I'm at work and need to be able to see the needle with clear eyes N-NAT lmfao now im getting giddy and a bit slap happy but you know those 2 words that are all caps very well. Hopefully that gives you as much of a laugh as it just did me.

I am so sorry for your loss Sarah.I can't even imagine.(((Hugs)))

Thanks hugs are always good!

Hello Sarah, I just wanted to say that I'm really sorry for your loss. I realize that it's been 3 years ago, but as I read your post, I can see it isn't getting any easier; I don't imagine it will. I don't have much to offer, only have a virtual hug. I hope that under the cir****tances, you'll find the sun comforting and know that love surpasses all, even death. Bless you Miss Sarah, you're pretty special! Dee

Thank you so much! You are such a sweetie!

Hi Sara, I was just going through some of the older posts. I saw yours and my heart aches for you. My dad died 4 years come Jan. 16th next year and I dont care to tell you I cry all the time. I loved and still love him so much. I am or was daddy's girl. He died suddenly from an aneurysm. The doctors just didnt want to treat it and it was a big one ..aortic...he was 69 years old. He was a great man never stopped. He had just returned from his farm (we are city slickers) he had been there a week. he worked all the time on that place or mine if I needed him. Honey it dont matter how old or how young they are when they die.. it hurts so bad.. and I do believe it hurts forever..I know if I could see my heart it is truly cracked right down the middle. It is a shame that they misdiagnosed your dad.. and it is a shame they didnt treat my dad. But you know what I believe ...is that we all have a number and when it's up ...it's up... now dont get me wrong... I was so mad at God for taking my daddy away...I couldnt understand why my daddy.. I had became a christian , got baptized.. was living right..and now God had the nerve to take my daddy... well I am not mad at God now...and I know he didnt do it to hurt me...I realize I am not the only one who has lost a loved one especially my daddy. I am so sorry he didnt get to meet your daughter..thats how it was with my grandfather... I know he would have loved my daughter he was fond of redheads...well I guess thats life sweetie... and it does get easier but it still hurts like hell... It has been a rough time for me ... I got a divorce from the father of my daughter..married 25 years, got hurt at work and lost my job due to the injuries..after 25 years of working for same company and then dad died... I seen him last on christmas eve of 2002.. he died jan 16, 2003...I have just returned from tennesse ,it was a great vacation and we went to the shops and I saw christmas ornament...I collect the snowmen ones.. I saw one with dad on it and I teared up and later back at the resort I cried like a baby... my husband is great at supporting me when I am down which is a lot.. I hope you have some good support to.. all these things happend wham bam...I really thought I would die and wished at the time I had... but now I have a new life and am happy...well kinda.. I am like you ... I miss my daddy ...and did I mention he was the best papaw ever...lucky for me I am 3 hours away from where dad is buried or I would be there toooo much...it would probably do me in... so try not to go too much..ok... take care sweetie... love those kids like there is no tomorrow...be strong... cry... scream...whatever makes you feel better but most of all thank God for what you have had.... and what you have...if you feel the need to talk just e-mail me sweetie. I am home all the time and I dont like it I get so depressed after working so many years ...take care God bless you Vicki