New and needing help

Hi all, I'm new to the forums and am thinking about going through surgery.  I haven't decided for sure yet, but have been told by several physicians that i should consider it.  My BMI is about 57, so i am thinking about DS but didn't see any physicians listed for the Louisville area that did it.  On a side note, I am having issues with my wife.  My family pretty much supports the idea that i may need the surgery, but my wife over and over says "I won't support you on this".  I think she thinks i am giving up and just haven't tried hard enough.  I have several co-morbiditys and i don't know how to bring her around.  Money shouldn't be a big issue.  I called my insurance yesterday (BCBS of Mass) and they said it was covered and that as long as i stayed in network i would have a 200.00 deductible and 10% copay to a max of 1000.00.  Any advice on doctors or what to say to my wife?  I've already sent her an email asking her to read http://www.wlscenter.com/Significant_Others.htm.  Thanks, Rob

SHOW HER THIS SITE & THE GREAT SUCESS WE ALL ARE HAVING WITH THE SURGERY I WOULD DO IT OVER IN A HEART BEAT ,I AM SO HAPPY I WENT THRU IT ,check out my site it says it all ,I was on blood pressure meds 2 times a day ,fluid pills ,sleep app,colestrol meds ,& was getting ready to take Dib meds that is where I drew the line & had to get healthy ,I feel great now & NO MEDS AT ALL Praise God for this surgery is all I have to say

As far as I know of there is no surgeons in KY that do D/S. As far as your wife is concerned...  Maybe she is just afraid of losing you.?  Explain to her that either way it is possible.  Many of us come to the point of having wls after everything else has failed and our health starts declining. Show her the site.  Let her learn about the sugeries along with you and let her look at peoples success stories of how much better their health is now and look at the before and after pics. Good luck to you.

I went through the same thing with my b/f of 21 years. He just thout I do not try hard enough. I asked him to go to the seminar with me and then he asked if he could go with me to meet the surgeon. I am using Dr Allen for the Lap Band. Now he sees that it isn't just me and that its not the "quick fix" he thought it would be. He understands that this may take more work and dedication than anything he could have ever imagined and that I definitely have not chosen an easy way out. He also told me that the reason he was against it was because he thought I wanted to lose weight and find someone younger.(He is 11 yrs older than me.)  I told him that I needed to do this because I can physically feel my body breaking down under this weight and if I don't do something now....I may not be around for him or my kids. I want to feel better. The ladies above are right...have her look at this website. My b/f was amazed at the before and after pics along with all the stories of struggle and support you can get on here! Now he sits with me when I am on here and is doing this with me. It is a great resource and support site!

I have looked at every doctor in kentucky and like Joy I don't know of any that does the DS,  unless it is someone that has recently moved into the state. the only one I found close to my location was Dr. Spaw at Baptist Hospital in Nashville.  I've since changed my mind and will go with RNY with Dr. Dyer at Centennial in Nashville,  but every one I spoke with were happy that they chose Dr. Spaw.    You may have to get the list of  doctors that are in network with your insurance that do the DS and research that way.    Your wife could be very scared for you,  but  she should also be scared for you if you remain obese. in my opinion the  best way to get her to come around is to give her time and let her see you are determined to be healthy,  let her be a part of your research and let her see this site,  take her to the seminars, if she will go.    Be patient with her.   my partner said no no no, but later could see that i was going to go through with it anyway, and he came around. Good luck.. Belinda

I think the DS sounds great and I have searched for a local doc who does it and there are none.  There are surgeons in Indy and Cincy both however if you want to seriously look into it.  Also write on the DS board and ask around there.  I have decided to go RNY with Mark Shina, here in Louisville, good record and good recommendations.  I had trouble with my husband early on too and it seems some spouses are afraid of the change.  They are afraid you will get healthy and find someone else.  Take her to the meetings with the surgeon you choose and let her be a part of the process, but most of all let her know that you will love her no matter what the scale says.  The only difference the surgery will make is that you will be healthy enough to live together longer.  Best of luck.  Vicki

raedwa01...........................y have u chose   the d s?  have u done the research on it?.............ther r some in ohio that do it    just  go to d s  forum  &   all i can tell u is   research    please  b-4  u make up ur mind

Hi Rob, I just wanted to tell you that Dr. Nease in Huntington WV does the DS. He is located at http://www.yourwls.com I'm not sure if that would be out of network or not... but I just wanted to let you know about him. As far as your wife I would invite her to look at this site...There are so many great resources on here.. Katrina :-)

My husband was against the surgery too.  I told him that I couldn't go on any longer being as large as I was. I invited him to come with me to the seminar (I went to St. Joes East) and afterwards, he was not only supportive, but sold as well. We both ended up having the surgery together. (5 weeks apart) Together we've lost almost 300lbs. and are feeling so much better than we did before surgery. We've been able to do several camping trips this year, whi*****luded hiking, and other favorite things we like. We do not regret our decision. I agree with the previous posters, show your wife this site and let her know exactly what it is your doing and the successes (and failures) of the surgery. Apart of families fears are not knowing exactly what the surgery is about. They base their opinions on misguided information or disinformation all together. Good luck to you and if I can be of any help (sorry, I do not know much about the DS, I had the prox) please feel free to let me know. Take care-- Dee